Tuesday, March 3, 2020

Fortunate One

That was the fortune that the Mr got from one of our homemade Chinese food nights right after he got word his resume got through to the next level.  I am happy to report the fortune was right and he got the job!  It's been 10 years of him being in a very reactive job at this company where his butt is on the line every single time.  Well, that's how it felt to him.  The Mr has a mythic work ethic he inherited from his dad and while that's not a bad thing, it doesn't make for a life without issues.

Issues with feeling the constant stress of "what is waiting for me?" come Sunday night or as vacations are coming to an end.  Issues of feeling his reputation is on the line if something he could never in a million years see coming breaks on "his" watch.  Issues with never being fully present at home because he is the one fully competent man heading up a department that used to have twelve people handling half of the tasks.  It has been hard watching him slowly kill himself over the course of his career.  He has made good strides over the past 18 months where he began pushing back in certain ways by standing up for himself.  They got a system in place that helped alleviate some people going directly to him instead of through the proper channels to delegate tasks fairly.  In the end, his bosses were not willing to get him even the slightest bit of help and when the big, big boss was told he was looking for a job, the response was "so what."  Well, you'll see what, lady.

I know it will take some time for him to not instinctively feel like he's got to run into his day Mach 10 with his hair on fire and space out during workouts because he's thinking about work.  I can't tell you how many times I've had to say "stop thinking about work" in the middle of a session.  Exercise can't do its de-stressing if you're thinking about everything pressing.   He is wired to keep going until the problem is solved and that's fine except there's ALWAYS a problem at this job.  It's never "done."  You start the morning a hero if you fix something and two hours later, you're on a shit list.  I can't watch him do it anymore and I'm so glad I no longer have to.  It has been the third person in this marriage for sure and it's time to kick them out.  More importantly, I am glad HE no longer has to live with that dark cloud that has loomed over us in his 24-year career.  It's always the best employees that get taken advantage of the most and they have ridden him for 10 years at this place like he has handrails on his back.

He'll still be with the same company so same vacation time and all of that stuff but the people he knows on that team are all happy to have him.  They all say "you're not going to believe how much better the management and atmosphere are over here!"  I pray they're right.  He deserves it.  Everyone involved has agreed it's important for him to make a clean break so ask him questions next week because he will not be available after that.  He's been desperately trying to train and get his team up to snuff (they all received the same training) and it's been easier for them to throw it back on him claiming ignorance.  While his immediate boss is a good guy and is sad to see him go, he said maybe this will help his team in the long run because now they won't have a choice.  This always happens too.  He leaves a position and they end up losing their key person and hire a whole team he'd been asking for for years.

The cool thing is we could see this plan aligning. For example, some things happened for seemingly no reason a year or so ago and have helped give him the edge over others.  He has always said God has taken care of us where his career is concerned and he's right.  There were things people were doing on their own that made it like "well, if you left, this person could do that and this other person could move here."  It made it feel like he was a shoo-in even though we never said it out loud so as not to jinx it even if we gave a knowing smile a time or two.  Now we can breathe that collective sigh of relief knowing the next part of his career is here and it appears to be much less stress because while he still finds issues, it's someone else's job to fix them.  He's in a class this week which was already paid for and funnily enough is a skill he needs for his new job so it's another one of those universe hat tips that makes you say "I see you."

So thank you to those who sent out your good vibes for his interview.  He appreciates it and so do I.  I am so proud of his dedication and I know that will continue but I am looking forward to him being able to leave work at work for his own health.  He has worked hard and now it's time to be rewarded with a new adventure that can take some weight off of his shoulders.

I love you hon.  I am so proud of you and I know you will be a happier, healthier person because of taking this risk.  Yes, it's nervewracking starting a new job but you've got this.   Listen to reason, season is calling.  😉

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  1. That is awesome! It makes me hopeful for my own situation.

  2. All of the above is true. I have been putting out fires my entire career and I never signed up for being head "whack a mole". Being in support like I have been is always a "what have you done for me lately" situation but the past 10 years in my position has progressively gotten worse because they just flat out refuse to fill seats yet continue to add more responsibilities. I am following a few other co-workers of mine to another division that is managed better and I do think it will be so good in the long run. Thanks everyone for the thoughts and prayers. And if you are in a situation that sounds like this, you owe it to yourself to find a way out, trust me.

  3. Big congrats to the Mr! I hope this new position is all you both hope it is.

  4. Congratulations Mr.! This is just awesome and is going to usher in a whole new reality for you guys with the old stressors being gone. Jobs always have some kind of stress, but this won't be the liver-eating kind that's been there for 10 years now. I'm so happy for you guys, especially knowing that time away will truly be time away, both physically and mentally. Celebrate well!!

  5. What wonderful news! Yes, a new job can be stressful in the beginning....what new thing isn't? And, I know from experience, it'll be a while before you stop having those awful, reactive feelings when something goes wrong. But know that they will stop and you will know how to do your new job soon. You both will be calmer, enjoy life & each other more. Congratulations!!!!

  6. Congrats to the Mister. A promotion well deserved, I would say!!


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