The other night when we went to see The Martian, we knew we weren't done for the night. Before we left, our time ran short and we didn't make it to the grocery store to refuel on produce for the week. By the time we got to the grocery store, it was 11:30pm and it almost looked closed from the outside.
It's kind of awesome because there was literally two other people there plus the stocking workers. But then the awesome turned to a bit of sadness as we recalled this used to actually be our usual shopping time on the weekends when we were at our highest weight. The last thing we wanted to do at 455 and 494 lbs was make the rounds at the grocery store for all to judge during the day. It wasn't even that we had a ton of junk in the cart either. People tend to think the morbidly obese just fill their carts with Ho Ho's, Nutty Bars, frozen pizzas and ice cream. Our carts were filled with fruits, veggies, Lean Pockets, organic tortilla chips, Snackwells, microwave popcorn and stuff like that. Not the greatest compared to what we get now but not what most would expect to see either.
Then we'd have to go through the self checkout because they don't have cashiers on lanes that late. It would take forever but we liked shopping in peace. It's not like anyone ever said anything to us. The Mr said he remembered a few side eye looks into our cart from Judgey McJudgersons but I never saw it because if I had, I would've said something. "Eyes on your own cart!" I have never looked in someone else's cart, it's not my business and frankly, who has the time to do that?
Actually one thing I do remember from those times was how invisible we were. We had people cut us off with carts, walk into us, barrel down the aisle at us as though we were going to move (we didn't) and I had no problem saying right at them (but to the Mr) "are we f**king invisible??? Because I know you can't miss me!" It would get no reaction because I think they were surprised the fat girl would stick up for herself.
Please do me a favor. If you see a morbidly obese person in the grocery store, please just give them a smile and some compassion like you would anyone. It likely took everything in them to even go and they may feel like everyone is staring at them. There is nothing worse than feeling like an outcast and nothing better than someone smiling at you and making you feel normal and that you matter.
When do you usually go to the grocery store? Be honest, do you judge other people's carts? I won't chastise you. ;-)
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It was definitely not a fun time in our history. Times have changed so much and for the better in that regard. I'm glad this is no longer our norm!
ReplyDeleteNo it wasn't. But if they had real cashiers at night, it might be worth it to avoid the throngs when we get out later than we intended.
DeleteWhen I was in college I used to shop after work (I got off about 1 am) and I loved the emptiness of the stores. Given my choice that's still when I'd shop, but it's not like I can wake up the boy and take him to WalMart in the middle of the night. Plus the Safeway here closes at 9pm. Now I have to shop on the weekends like everybody else, and I end up leaving as a shaking wreck sometimes. Seriously, it's not a coffee shop people, grab your stuff and move along. No need to stop in the middle of the aisle to chat - finish your shopping and go get a coffee if you want to catch up. And when you do stop to chat, don't give me that glare when I dart between you to grab something you've blocked. I wouldn't interrupt your conversation that way if you weren't standing in front of the bananas. Geesh. Have I mentioned I don't do well with people?
ReplyDeleteI don't judge other people's carts, what they get is their business. I do admit to having grocery cart envy though when the person behind/ahead of me has their cart all stacked neatly by category (frozen, canned, etc.) and it looks pretty whereas mine is all jumbled together where I threw stuff in. I just don't have the stacking gene I guess. I don't care what the items are, I'm just a little jealous of their organization.
Just tell him you're having a sleepover at Walmart! :-) I can't stand it when people stand there in the middle of the aisle and then when you say excuse me, they grunt all annoyed like it's your fault. I don't do well with people either. (Actually, I looked at a part time job working the Santa line at the mall and the Mr laughed and said "that would not end well!")
DeleteI have never seen anyone stack their carts! Is this common? That's how oblivious I am to others!
I've never looked in someone else's cart regardless if they were obese or super fit. Just never interested me. I dislike grocery shopping more and more these days so I try to get what I have to and get out. I used to peruse aisles, but the vibe just feels different and I don't enjoy it anymore (used to love doing it). Weird. I hear what you're saying though with the peacefulness in the store later. I didn't get home the other night from shopping for mom until 10pm and the store was wonderful. Plenty of space, could make my loop (had to double back a few times though because I was extremely tired and forgot stuff - lol) and still had a check out guy who was super nice. That was one of the more pleasant experiences of late.
ReplyDeleteYeah me either. I dislike grocery shopping when it's past 9am or if the store hasn't stocked something I need. Otherwise I don't mind it but I don't lollygag as much as I used to that's for sure. I should try it though, there are probably new things I should try that I'm missing.
DeleteI tend to go Sunday mornings at about 8 or 9. I honed that skill in when I lived in CT to time it when the store just opened or people were at church. If you go too early, things aren't out yet and the store I went to in CT had grumpy stockers in the produce department.
ReplyDeleteIf I have to hit up Sam's Club, I got at 7am on Saturdays since I have a business membership and it isn't open to the public til 9am. So it's much more peaceful.
I don't really judge people's carts. I do look, especially if their cart is over-flowing. I managed to hit everyone's "pantry re-stock" day a few weeks ago when I went in the afternoon with my mom... And it reminded me why I got at 8am, not 2pm.
That's when we go too! Especially Trader Joe's because once the entitled granola moms come in with their hellions, the experience goes way downhill. Cool deal on Sam's Club!!
DeleteI recently looked at a dude's trunk when the multi-colored Rubix Cube of colors caught my peripheral. He had about 20 12 packs of various soda and then was loading in the vitamin waters. I'm assuming either a coach or a party I'd want to be invited to since it wasn't beer.
I do judge other's carts. I felt judged before, and now am proud of what I have bought, but unfortunately I check out other people's purchases and do some judging. Or sometimes it's just jealousy, as in, "I wish I could still eat like that." I find the worst people in stores are those that work there. They evidently feel like they are more important than the customer, they will stand in your way, walk in front of you, and sometimes run right into you. Whatever happened to, "The customer is #1?"
ReplyDeleteFOR SHAME!!! I kid!! ;-)
DeleteHA, the customer is #1. I think that attitude stopped when they started hiring 20 year olds as managers. You complain about something legit and they shrug and say "so."