Wednesday, August 17, 2011

There has to be better ways to burn 1000 calories

We played chase the ball last night for exercise...aka- tennis.  I wanted a way to burn 1000 calories but knew this was the last of the nicer days we were going to have for a while before being in the humidity just wasn't an option for us.  Tennis sounds so good in theory, if you're good.  We aren't.  I don't mind that we're not good but the place we go to has no nets, is fenced in and the length of three actual courts.  Somehow we manage to chuck the ball over a 20' fence several times and go from court 1 to court 3 as though sucking that bad was a requirement for being paid.  It's fun like the first 10 minutes and then you realize you're either doing that jog that implies "I don't want to chase this ball anymore" or you're bending over for the 548th time saying out loud "I don't want to chase this ball anymore" or I believe my exact words were "this blows!"

The first time I looked at my HRM, I figured I'd burned about 300 calories.  Sorry. Wrong answer.  Try 258 or something like that.  I audibly groaned and told myself "just make it to 400.  I know you came to burn 1000 but that ain't happening."  I got to 500 and I was about ready to quit.  Then I thought about how much I'd have to burn between the other 2 workouts this week and thought no, go to 800.  800 is acceptable.  At some point I just kept trying to keep my heart rate in the "pathetic" zone over the "are you even moving?" zone.  When the Mr was off to fetch another rogue ball from the other side of the fence, I'd walk around the court to keep from standing still.  I used to think those runners who were jogging in place waiting for a light to change were just trying to show off.  "Hey look, I'm a runner.  I'm jogging in place so it's like I'm still running but not.  Aren't I cool?"  Now I get it.  Oh you mean you're actually trying to keep your heart rate up to burn calories.  Roger.  We have clearance Clarence!

Finally I just kept telling myself 50 more calories until I hit the 1000+ calorie goal I set in the first place.  I felt really good about reaching it and very glad to get out of the sun with my wicked sunburn from the previous days antics even though I was now coated in 100 SPF.  But the problem with being heavily shellacked in the stuff is when it sweats into your eyes you have a special kind of temporary blindness.  Hey maybe THAT'S why I kept hitting balls over the fence!?  Yeah, that's the ticket!  I'm going with it.  I'm glad I got it in for a change of pace and we got to enjoy the weather but I think I'm rather fancying my homemade circuit tonight to burn a good 800 calories in 30 minutes.  It's our last peaceful night before a family member's dog invades for a few days.  She's a puppy, submissive pees when someone new enters the room and has the attention span of a gnat.  This should reinforce our decision not to get another dog for a long, LONG time.  Our lifestyle just doesn't support awesome is that?

What exercise is the least favorite in your repertoire?  

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  1. I push it too. When I'm on the bike and the calories tick off SO slowly, and I'm ready to give up, my competitive side takes over and keep saying just 25 more, just 25 more. I get it done but it sucks the whole time!

  2. As usual, love your wicked sense of humor. It would never in a million years occurred to me to go out and attempt to play tennis just to burn calories, considering I don't play tennis. Come to think of it, though, I did make a half-hearted attempt to play basketball with 5'2", him 6'4", lol.

    Love your blog spot!

  3. Unfortunately my most common exercise has become my least favorite. I joined Curves in January (after I used up every day of the free month my SIL gave me) and thought it was great. It was, considering I hadn't done a damn thing in a long time and I was now exercising 4-5 times a week. Now though it's really hard to get my heart rate up during the regular circuit (Zumba nights I don't have that problem). Plus, when I try to get it up there, people look at me funny. Many of the members are older ladies trying to stave off osteoporosis, not lose weight, so they do a whole different style of workout. Add that to the gossip central aspect... Blech. Hate it.
    I stay because 2 nights a week I get Zumba in a small group, if I don't go I won't do any strength training at all, and it works best for me time-wise. I just wish I looked forward to it like I used to.

  4. Your description of your tennis match is pretty much what I'd expect if I were to give it a go. It does look fun, though! And I just looked at your workout schedule and giggled when I saw you have tennis in quotation marks!

  5. hmpetras- Isn't it funny how we can psyche ourselves out just to push through something irritating? LOL

    Cheri- Glad to see you here! I would love to have access to a basketball hoop. Whenever we go to the park, those are where all the kids are and no way would I try to compete with that! LOL

    Cattitude216- You'd probably do better! We're SOOO bad! :-) Yeah I felt compelled to write "tennis" because I felt like a real life demo on how NOT to succeed at tennis!

  6. Another Layer- Can you get a friend to join with you? It would be nice if you had someone with as much intensity as you do. Who the heck has time to gossip when you're exercising? That's best done over a cup of tea in the morning or after a workout! ;) Hang in there and keep on showin' those old ladies how it's done!

  7. right now I ams till limited so when I can get any excercise in I don't complain

    but I despise the treadmill - boring

    I am not a jogger, but at least if I go for a brisk wlak outside I can see something

  8. Least favorite exercise ever: anything to do with lifting my arms over my head. I hate it. My neck is strained and my arms and the worst part of my body strength-wise.

    PS: You were doing it wrong. You're not supposed to hit it over the fence, you're supposed to try and hit the Mr. in the head...that's what I do. Then it becomes a 'Gladitor' event.

  9. One work friend actually joined recently, so she'll be there at the same time as me once school starts. I don't want to scare her off though so I'll have to wait until her intensity ratchets up a little on her own.

    One of the "coaches" talked to me about a more intensive workout she was going to train in and then pass on, but she's the mid-day person and I'm not usually there at that time.

    My philosophy is that if you have the air to chat, you're not working hard enough. I don't like to be rude to the ladies though. Once school starts and I'm back to afternoons instead of mornings it should be better because a bunch of us "non-retireds" come in after work and many of them work harder.

  10. You stinker! Are you gonna hide from spark now? :( Hmmm my least favorite workout-guess that could be running since I can't do it with ye olde PF--all I can do to walk the dog in the morning. I don't care for the Insanity workouts either...way to many high impact jumps and squat thrusts--anyone with even a 1/4 innertube around the waist can't keep up with such nonsense. Seeing as I have the entire spare tire, not happening.

  11. I'm doing a boot camp right now and he KILLS us every day. I would say my LEAST favorite of all of the exercises he has us do are the wheel barrows where a partner holds your legs, then drops one. You support that leg while either doing push ups or walking on your hands back & forth. Then repeat with the other leg. Also any of the hopping or jumping exercises just hurts my knees.

  12. Hey there, Beautiful! I found you! I've been missing you, and I'm 'here' more than I'm 'there' so, I hope we'll be friends here, too!

    As usual, you blow me away with your uncompromising, take no prisoners effort. You are my hero in every way possible.

    I HATE jogging/running in general, and honestly, I still hate exercise for its own sake. I love moving, I love friendly competition, I love sweating and exerting myself as I play, but I hate exercise for the specific and sole purpose of burning calories... which is exactly my problem in general as I continue to work through this weight journey.

    Thanks for being YOU, and making it easier for me to become who I really am.

    {{{{{{{{{ HUGS }}}}}}}}}


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