Friday, December 29, 2023

What I'm Reading This Week #52

Time for the ole Miss...the olllllle man.  (Kudos if you don't need to Google that.  I know the Mr doesn't.)   It shouldn't surprise you I don't have a sappy year end wrap up in the works for this last week of the worst year of my life.  My goal over a resolution is to not die this coming year...which will be cringey to stumble upon if I do.  We have lived like hillbillies since March with no baseboards on the left side of our house, no handrail going into the basement, green glue covered carpet that makes me want to spit every time I step on it, a shitty ceiling smoothing of the 2nd floor that still makes me cringe when I look up in addition to the bathroom ceiling that blisters that I pretend to ignore but see more spots every time we shower, the balusters rotting in the garage, the bathroom sink not attached to the wall so you can see the caulk break all around the counter and on the chair railing in our only bathroom, and said bathroom's flooring taking up a corner of the office.  We've got black paint for the front door that was supposed to be painted 6 months ago before my world imploded.  So we have MORE than enough to keep us busy and zero motivation to do any of it because we also have a basement that looks like someone took all of our belongings, put them in a dryer and opened the door mid cycle.  So yeah...there's all of that.

Now let's open:

32 Ways to Motivate Yourself to Work Out (I'm really hoping my legs fall into line because I miss our walks.  I just bought this lil baby to speed things along.  It looks straight out of Beetlejuice!)

How to Meal Plan: 5 Easy Steps for Quick & Easy Meal Planning  (Tis the season!  If you're new here, I love these meal prep containers and if you're going back to the office, this Hot Logic Mini is a life saver!)

Water Is Life — Here Are 11 Simple Ways to Drink More of It  (Um, if you think I'm going to obsess on doubling my intake when I can't even get in 64 ounces of pure water, I laugh in your general direction.)

I Ate Peanut Butter Every Day for a Week—Here’s What Happened  (Oh, me too!  Peanut butter blossom... peanut butter ball... peanut butter cup...oh, wait.)

Do Acupressure Mats Work?  (Well, I know when I've got a jerk azz muscle in my calf or lower back mine sure helps loosen things up.)

Why is My Scalp So Itchy — and How Can I Fix it?  (Like clockwork with the change of season.)

15 Things You Didn’t Know Could Slow Down Aging  (Dying, don't forget that!  Whoops!  *Stuffs grief dark humor back in pocket*)

Menopause Gaslighting Hinders Care for Women (I really don't know how I'm going to deal with that crap when things get bad.  Their answer to everything is antidepressants.)

If you missed any posts here this week, catch up below:

So that's that.

2023, I literally hate you with every fiber of my being.  

If I could set fire to a year, I would burn you from beginning to end but you did a pretty good job of that for me.  I have spent the past 5 years signing off every year of our "one happy year" thankful that it's over because the bad seemed to outweigh the good but I see you were trying to prep us for the worst.  With that track record, the Mr and I are just going to dig a bomb shelter on a piece of land and hope life doesn't say "hold my beer."  There is nothing to celebrate here for NYE and I have zero desire to watch a ball drop or even pay attention to the calendar flip.  Mom's sib and I both said we're dreading the calendar flip because we are leaving Mom behind.  She was here to start the last one and not here to start the new one and that just feels like shit.  Yet another grief puzzle to work through.  We also agreed that we can't even take solace in getting through "the firsts" because literally every single person who has gone through heart wrenching grief has told both of us "oh, you think the first year is bad, that's nothing compared to the second!!"  Um, thanks??


I hope everyone else has a great NYE if you're going to go out and about.  Be safe.  Hug everyone you love and you know why.  I don't have to say it.  That's the cheeriest I can muster right now.   We'll see you in the new year, God willing.  (Unless your resolution is 'yeah, I'm not up for this crap anymore... unfollow.')

So I try to not let my grief brain post stuff like:



(It could be your last.)


So instead I'll just sit this right here and peace out.


Seriously though, got any plans for celebrating or are you the part of the five people here that is perfectly content to be in bed by 9pm with earplugs? 😁

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  1. Seeing the 52 is always interesting to me and this really is the toughest one ever. I don't have the words to make this better but I do completely understand because I had the same feelings with the loss of my Dad. It's not an easy place to be when stuck between leaving a crappy year behind and not wanting the year to end either for that particular reason. Just know that you are not alone in this and we'll get through it together as always!

    1. I'm sorry you have to suffer along with me. 😞 Thank you for all you have done and the ways you support me. ❤️

  2. The second year and all the ones that follow it are not necessarily the worst. It's different for everybody, and with different years come different feelings. It's way too hard to predict how you'll feel in one year compared to now. People mean well when they try to empathize with someone's grief, but it's unfair to say "this year is going to suck worse for you than the first one." No one knows that ahead of time, just because of what's they've experienced.
    We have no plans for NYE other than the hubs working a 1/2 day and me working on the house and working for my job since it's month-end and year-end that needs to get done. The hubs is in bed every night by 8pm at the latest and I try to follow suit by no later than 10:30pm, so ringing in the new year is something we haven't done in probably over a decade.
    I'll be thinking of you guys and send you lots of love and hugs as you go through these next few days. xoxoxoxo

  3. No plans for the hubs and I for New Years, we will be content with that. Pork and sauerkraut, that's all I'm looking forward to. Here's wishing that 2024 is a much better year for all of us. {Hugs}


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