Hairy beast, impending age issues and what I'm reading this week

It's Friday y'all...can I get an Halleluyer?

I need a vacation.  Seriously.  I'm so tired of dealing with irritating people who won't proverbially shit or get off the pot, situations out of our control and decisions being made that basically are akin to Indy throwing the sand over the invisible bridge and taking a step on faith.  I would like to just be able to take a breath please and not have some kind of bullcrap to worry about for a week or so.

Yesterday was hairy beast day.  My hair turned this weird ass orangey color from the sun in Kauai.  I mean I had brown roots and red hair with no dye involved.  I HATED it!  It reminded me of my cringeworthy Sun In days.  Ever since then, my hair tends to get this brassy red in the summer.  So I grabbed some John Frieda foam hair coloring.  I'd never tried it before and I wasn't sure how foam would work but it seems to be just fine.  The color is nice and dark again with only slight hints of the red in certain light but it's not the dominant color.  No blotchiness that I can see and it's somewhat soft but thankfully not fried like it felt a few years ago when I found one gray hair, flipped out and grabbed cheap hair color and turned it into a haystack.  Then I grab the cold wax strips and shaped the brows.  I can't do tweezers.  Maybe one or two but nothing more than that.  I don't rip them way back because I can't stand over-tweezed/super thin eyebrows and mine border on Brooke Shields in the 80's.  I don't really mind it but as I've gotten older, the hair seems to grow further down the eyelid than it used to.  WTF is that about?!  Am I part Bigfoot, Gus?  (Extra points if you know the reference)  Is this just the beginning of the things waiting for me as I age?

That reminds me, when I was at the wedding last weekend, I was talking to a guy from high school in church while we were waiting for the wedding to start.  There was a row of older people ahead of us.  Most in their late 60's, maybe a little older and then one couple that was probably late 50's.  The guy was lamenting about how he's going to be turning 40 soon and we began lamenting about earlier bedtimes (12:00am is early for me), aching joints and not wanting to go out quite as much.  I said I should just start practicing beating kids with a stick off my lawn.  The woman in her 50's turned around, smiled and said "just you kids wait!"  Hey, has Oprah been lying all this time when she's been word barfing about how much "better" it gets as you get older?  Is that a lie that people older than we are tell us?  Kind of like how you can't get relatives that are mothers to talk about pain of childbirth or the possibility of pooping during childbirth because if you knew ahead of time the human race would go extinct.  She scared me a little in her "you're going to piss yourself when you sneeze, your boobs will end up tucked in your socks and jowls are imminent" tone.

I'm babbling.

Let's get to...

How to Lockdown Facebook Now that Graph Has Rolled Out  (Don't let something stupid you said 5 years ago pop up to the general public)

How to Get Sh!t Done Working from Home  (Great ideas!)

Father's Epic Letter to His Closed Minded Daughter (Regardless of your stance on the issue...this is why Grandpa's rock)

Get a Full Body Workout with No Equipment

Clean Stubborn Stains with Shaving Cream  (Good to know!)

Airlines Promise a Return to Civility...For a Fee  (If everyone pays to board early then how can you call it early boarding??)

24 Smart Ways to Stress Less About Technology  (Take this to heart tech junkies!)

17 Reasons Kids Don't Like Facebook Anymore (Don't drink anything while reading this.  Hilarious)

12 Fall Food Fails  (Make yourself feel better about not being able to produce what you saw on Pinterest)

11 Fashions the Kids Were Wearing in 1993  (Uh, thank God I didn't wear 80% of these stupid fads!)

7 Ways to Curb Your Cravings   (Could've used this the other night!)

5 Unusual Ways Men Learn to Be Good Husbands

Roll Out With These 5 Foam Roller Exercises (video starts on landing)

Pill made of poop cures gut infection  (For my friends with gut issues)

Dumb and Dumber's Blind Billy is back!  (video starts on landing but you don't need to watch it.  There are pics in the article)

That's about it for that.  We're going on a small road trip tomorrow then watching football when we get back.  We need to clean the house Sunday...boo.  Or maybe today.  Double boo.

What are you doing this weekend?  Anything good?

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