Hunger pains and Food Journal Friday

I'm getting a bad scale vibe this week.  I cut my calories back this week and I have been so friggin' hungry that I literally was awakened from the very little sleep I get from stabbing hunger pains 4:30am Thursday morning.  Then I would eat and less than an hour later I would be painfully hungry again.  So this'll be interesting.  I also think I might've torn my calf muscle because every move is painful right now so exercise today will be walking around the neighborhood to give it a bit of a rest.  Note to self:  don't do calf raises until they hurt or you will hurt for days later.

I found this article interesting, so I thought I'd share.  It's 3 words men don't want to hear and could eventually change their opinion of you.  Yes, it's weight related and oddly enough, something I was already considering writing a post about before I even read it.  It's not Earth shattering and I could certainly think of far worse three word phrases but still, in case you're bored at work.

Let's get to the eats!

Sunday was Trader Joe's Spinach Ricotta Ravioli and finished off the last of the King's Hawaiian dinner rolls.  Calories:  453

Monday was fiesta lime Orange Roughy over thai lime rice.  Calories: 440

Tuesday was orange chile pink salmon (cayenne pepper and orange marmalade) with grilled asparagus.  Calories:  394

Wednesday was Mahi fish taco with broccoli slaw and arugula and a side of brussels with pesto gouda.  We're almost out.  Trader Joe's PLEASE bring back the pesto gouda...it's amazing!!!!  Calories:  485

Thursday was chicken tacos with arugula and hot taco sauce with a side of brussels.  Calories:  685

Tonight is BBQ salmon burger with a side of russet wedges and brussels.  Calories:  526

If you need some Easter yummies to bring Sunday, consider some of my recipes I shared last year.

Easter Egg Cake Balls
Easy Pineapple Banana Easter Cupcakes

Happy Easter y'all!  Try not to imbibe in more candy than you can work off in a week!  ;-)

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Oh good, another fat passenger debate

Did y'all hear about the push by one economist to urge airlines to start charging passengers by the pound?  Mmm hmm.  I usually try to stay out of hot button issues like this one but since we'll be traveling in the next few months, this perked my attention.

His three “pay as you weigh” models are:

Total weight: A passenger’s luggage and body weight is calculated, with the fare comprising a per kilo cost. In this scenario a passenger weighing 100 kilos (220 lbs) with 20 kilos (44 lbs) of luggage (120 kilos / 265 lbs total) would pay twice that of a passenger of 50 kilos (110 lbs) with 10 kilos (22 lbs) of luggage (60 kilos/132 lbs total).

Base fare +/- extra: A base fare is set, with a per-kilo discount applying for “underweight” passengers and a per-kilo surcharge applying to “overweight” passengers.

High/Average/Low: A base fare is set, with a predetermined discount applying for those below a certain weight threshold and a predetermined surcharge applying for those above a certain weight threshold.

Bhatta prefers the third of these options. He goes on to say that weight could be ascertained through passenger self-declaration, with one in five passengers randomly selected and weighed to dissuade cheats (with penalties for cheaters) or by weighing all passengers at check in.
This latter option however would “incur huge transaction costs” and “would require a passenger to arrive a couple of hours early to have time to get through weigh-in, security and passport control.”

To read the full story, click here.

I've got all kinds of things running through my head from "I'm not surprised" to "isn't the public shame and/or comments enough to deal with?" to "let me move to an atoll and live out our days amongst birds and fish so I don't have to deal with idiots anymore."

What are your thoughts on the 'pay by the pound' suggestion?  Would it deter you from flying if you're overweight/obese more than you might already be with the court of public opinion you have to face when walking down the aisle?

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Jelly legs and movie review

Woo Lordy are my legs sore!  The Mr gave me "homework" before he left for work yesterday to come up with a lower body Total Trainer/Free Weight hybrid workout as good as the upper body version I created the week before.  Well just to crush any future requests he might have brewing I came up with a torturous lower body version.  He couldn't walk afterward.  Let's see if he gives me workout homework again in the future.  Don't worry, I'm going to have a "workout week" and it'll get included so get your "pinning" trigger finger ready!

It was movie night last night.  We rented...



I've always loved Billy Crystal even back in the "Fernando" days on SNL.  "It is better to look good than to feel good and dahling, you look mahvelous!"  Yeah, I dated myself, wanna make something of it?  I also remember seeing City Slickers in Grauman's Chinese Theater in L.A.  I loved that movie and I still say "hellooooo" 22 years later.  Typing that made me want to figuratively shoot myself.

In Parental Guidance, (affiliate link)  Billy plays a baseball announcer and when he returns home to find his wife (Bette) doing her strip class in the house, he moseys past her and reveals some upsetting news.  Their daughter, Marissa Tomei, needs babysitters for her three kids for a week.  Hilarity ensues.  Long Duk Dong makes an appearance and makes you weep for lost youth.  I pray that the representation of parenting in this day and age is seriously overdramatized.  For real yo.  Of course being the sap I am, I was sobbing several times towards the end.  Midler and Crystal are the perfect couple and I'd love to have 'em as grandparents.  This is a great movie and we give it four thumbs up.  If you're not affected by "lights out Alice", you have a heart of stone.  Rent it.

Rented any good movies lately?  Made up any cool workouts?

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Size distortion

I forgot to write my post last night and as usual, the Mr jinxed me when he said "at least we get to sleep in tomorrow."  He's got a routine blood panel this morning so he gets to sleep in for an extra hour whereas that would've been my normal wake up time.  But just like always when he said that, my brain registered "5am wake up call?  You got it!"  I went to the bathroom came back in and laid there for an hour.  Then I realized I forgot to write my post and despite being tired, I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep.  So here I am.

I got up and flipped on the tube and some new uber workout that looks like fun but my feet will never be able to handle in this lifetime anymore was on.  A woman who lost 22 lbs was all "I lost 22 pounds and went from a size 9 to a size 0."  Um...I'm NOT trying to be mean but if she's a size zero did they start going into negative numbers in clothing?  She's a solid size 4-6 especially with her curvy booty.  Now I'm not saying I wouldn't love to have a body like hers but wow, our vanity sizing is out of control!!  (But if you're a long time reader, you've already heard me rant about this.)  I think mentally all I need is to get out of what society considers "plus sizes" that's what a size 14 or is it a 12 now? and anything below that will be nice but not really hold much merit in my mind anymore.  I mean I remember back in the day when I was a tween and a family member had bulimia.  Before we knew she had it, she was down to a size 0 and I mean a REAL size 0 and it was horrifying...not something you aspired to!  It's like some of society won't be happy until they have the ability to say "I'm a negative 4...the smallest size they make and when I turn to the side, I disappear.  Beat that!  Damn I'm hungry."

Sorry, this is what you get when my brain is hazed from lack of sleep and incessant infomercials as my background noise.  I blame the Mr and his declaration of extra sleep before extra sleep was had.  It makes me want to fry up some bacon and say "oh I'm sorry, I forgot you have to fast this morning!"  But I won't.  I don't think.  Hmm...

What's the most ridiculous sizing issue you've ever encountered?

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Hometown, saucy messages and bingefest

It was an interesting weekend.  

I surprised the Mr. with a road trip to his hometown.  We got some of our favorite food there and to bring home to freeze like we do every year so when he's homesick, he can have one of his favorite meals.  We stopped off at a park and watched the ducks.

We stopped by all of the same haunts, heard the same stories (recited a few with him) and then started our way home.  We saw some classy sites like a truck with the following painted on the back...

 I'd be lying if I said a little part of me wasn't tempted but I didn't.

Then came the beginning of the end for our nerves.  It all started with this guy.

That is a bad picture of a douchebag that was on our ass for a few miles, then decided to get on the butt of the guy next to us while we're all in a construction zone going 55 with nowhere to go.  He was laying on his horn and screaming so I took out my camera and snapped this pic and kept it trained on him so he thought I was recording him.  I don't know if you can tell he's covering his face then he backed off...way off and minded his manners around us from that point on.  

The rest of the night was spent shopping locally and it seemed that every complete and utter idiot had decided to descend upon every place we wanted/needed to go.  We (okay, I) picked up some things from World Market that had no business in our cart like a medium bag of mango jalapeno chips (we never buy chips) and mini ginger snap cream sandwich cookies.  Then I stress ate them over the weekend.  Yep, all of 'em.  Well between the two of us. 

We've had some stress and I hate that occasionally that urge to quell it with food still pops up.  We also came to some realities on how badly our plan will have to change from this point on and it was like "screw you!"  *insert chips and cookies.*   It's really bad when we're both on "I don't give a shit anymore" mode.   We're over it now but it was ugly.  Like chip crumbs around the mouth and cookie logos embedded in your forehead ugly.  I need to get my head around where we need to go from here so just bear with me while we figure this out over the coming weeks.  I know I'm starting by getting in a lot more water because I'm just really slacked and I'm tired of my fingers looking like prunes.  

So yeah, that was my weekend.

What did you do this weekend?

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Weigh In

I knew from the way my legs were bloated and sausage fingers weren't allowing my rings easy access despite them spinning like loose lug nuts all week that the scale was going to show a gain.  

Up about 1 1/2.

It makes me want to say "I should've just stuffed myself with the damn stuffed cheeseburger I so triumphantly  threw in the garbage last Saturday!"  I know, I shouldn't have but hell if I was going to gain anyway, why not do it with panache?

I know...illogical.

I don't care.

It's my blog...I'll spout whatever non-sensical crap I want.

*Hmmph!*

It just cements my plan for next month.  I'm not sharing it yet because I don't know all of the details yet myself but let's just say there's a small part of me that hopes it won't work because it would suck if that has to be my new reality.  Stay tuned on that front.

I'm trying not to let it affect my mood for today since I already have a previous night's irritant on my mind, the bra I need to wear today was left overnight in the washer by someone on a pretty good roll with laundry (not me), was deprived of sleep since I seem to be waking up at 5am every day and just lay there for 2 hours and now this weigh in.  I know, "choose happiness!"  "Seek rainbows!"  "Don't be a bitch when you're trying to surprise your husband with something nice!"  *HISS!*

I will say, I need to get my water in check.  I was dehydrated oh, pretty much every day last week.  I suck at it.  I'm already up half the night peeing (once or twice) then can never get back to sleep so I feel like adding more will just screw me up even more.  I guess I'll just have to make a point to chug a whole 36 ouncer between breakfast and lunch then continue with business as usual and be closer to 100 oz of water than 70 but still not feel the increase into the evenings.  Welcome to middle age.  *groan*

I think it's time we put the down comforter away for the season too.  I wake up so friggin' hot in the middle of the night (not a hot flash...I have hit that beauteous stage in life yet, thank God.  Hats (or clothes) off to ya's that are going through it all) and its all because of that comforter.  It's pretty but I'm tired of kicking it on and off.  I cringe when I hear the heat kick on.

Welp, the Mr is downstairs, I have to pretend to be all jazzed for today with a stiff neck, headache, a wet bra, sausage fingers and tree trunk legs.  Obviously you all wish you could hang out with me today when I'm in such an awesome mood.

Time for breakfast.

What has you frustrated lately?

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Free money and Food Journal Friday

It's Friday y'all!  Man this week has dragged/drug been long.  

You know when it's a good day?  When you get this...

$10 off at Sur La Table?  Don't mind if I do.  I know where I'm going Sunday!

I'm going to have the Mr run over to the video store and pick up This Is 40.  (affiliate link)  There has been a serious dry spell of good movie releases this month.  Boo.  I have high hopes for this one.  I'm actually hoping I will love it so much it'll go on the wish list for b-day/Cmas.  Let's hope I'm not eating those words tomorrow.

{Update} - Mmm, these words taste mighty good with BBQ sauce.  It's REALLY bad when the credits are better.

You wanna see the food, don't you?  Let's eat!

Sunday was pineapple, roasted red pepper bbq chicken naan pizza and our Sunday tradition of TJ's chipotle cheddar bites.  Calories:  715

Monday was chicken tacos with "rainbow salad."  (Black beans, corn, red peppers, scallions)  Calories:  623

Tuesday was crab stuffed flounder, thai lime rice and grilled green beans.  Calories:  645

Wednesday was one of our favorite meals.  BBQ chicken quesadilla with TJ's pesto gouda, grilled purple potatoes since my russets were putting down roots and brussels.  Calories:  656

Thursday was mahi fish taco, leftover rainbow salad and a side of brussels with roasted red peppers.  Calories:  680

Tonight's dinner will be BBQ salmon burger, a side of brussels and a clementine.  Calories:  425

I've got a little surprise for the Mr tomorrow so I can't say what we're doing this weekend but Sunday I'm definitely hitting up Sur La Table.  If only I could live there, roll on the floors and cover myself in their merchandise.  Oops, I probably shouldn't have said that aloud.

What's on tap for your weekend?

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It's current crush time

I am obsessed with Justin Timberlake's song Suit and Tie from his new album The 20/20 Experience.(affiliate link) 

Of course I'd like it a heck of a lot more without Jay Z in it but that's just my personal preference.  I streamed his album on iTunes and it's no FutureSex/LoveSounds ((affiliate link) which was AWESOME) but still has some good tracks on it so I bought it.  My favorites are Suit and Tie, Mirrors (except for the incessant "you are the love of my life" part...it makes me want to smack someone), Strawberry Bubblegum and Blue Ocean Floor.  I'm not gonna lie there are a few tracks that annoy me but who knows, they might grow on me.  I desperately needed some new GOOD music.

West Elm has these adorable Dog Plates by Claudia Pearson.

There is nothing cuter than a weenie dog wearing a panama hat or drinking a margarita.  Let grilling season begin!

This Bronson Galvanized Divided Lazy Susan from Pottery Barn makes me want to go out and buy a bunch of things to sort and divide just so I can use it.

World Market has this Aqua Vintage Style Scale that has me a-swoonin'.

Can't you just see a big ol' colorful bunch of bananas or oranges in there?  I'm easily impressed.

Pier 1 Imports has this cute Ceramic Menu Board that I'd love to write my nightly creations on even if the Mr and I are the only people who would read it.

Home Decorators has some cool bookends and I really like this Birds on Fence set for our French Country bedroom.  I like how it's broken up with three ends instead of two.

That's about it for me...how about you?

What are you crushing on?

(This post contains a few affiliate links)

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Letting fear become your fact

I wanted to thank everyone for their kind responses to my freak out yesterday.  I wish I could say my heart isn't still beating out of my chest but it is.  I think it's because before it was such a distant thing and now it's a couple of calendar flips away.  I think the biggest part of why its affecting me is because of the part I can't train for...getting on the board in the water.  I'm going to have this tiny little local boy who can easily whip up on his board like it's nothing and I picture finding the right way to kneel onto the board getting far enough over to get my other leg/knee on the board without looking like a beached manatee...or farting in his face.  From that point on, I'm pretty confident.

I know, that seems like such a small thing but I am a control freak and not being in control of that part just freaks me out.  I know people say "what's the worst that could happen?"  Well I liken it to 2011 when we went to Napa and I surprised the Mr with a hot air balloon ride over wine country.  (I still crack up that two non-drinkers spent the first few days of their 15 year anniversary in wine country without drinking a single sip of wine.)  I wasn't worried about being 2500 feet over land, running into electrical wires and plummeting to our deaths, about highly flammable tanks malfunctioning...nope.  I saw the balloon and that there was no step stool to get in.  I hounded the people about how on Earth were you supposed to enter the thing and was freaked out about our weights (just over 300).  They said there were "steps" built into the basket and you ladder climb up them and into the basket.  Oh yeah, sounds simple.  So was it as bad as I thought?  Yes.  It sucked.  I was the first one in and pulled my thigh crack because it was so awkward for a tall, fat chick to attempt to hop down into a big wicker basket 4' deep with people behind you waiting to get in.  The only "upside?"  No one did it gracefully.  Thinner people did it less graceful including someone who actually dove into the basket.  I was just glad it wasn't me.  I made a point to not watch people getting in so as to not make them more nervous.

The paddle boarding is going to be the first appointment in the morning and that's fine but you have a bunch of companies that launch off of that site not just for SUP (stand up paddle) but rafts going out to the ocean and making waves.  I remember how intently the local in the raft last time was watching the Mr and throwing in his two cents and as I listen to him on the video, it makes me want to reach through the screen and punch him.  We weren't paying you for your instruction Mr. Mouth, even if one thing he said..."look at the horizon"...was the best advice someone could give to keep your balance.  There were like 5 instructors and clients all standing around focusing just on him and while he can block that crap out, I'm not as adept.  I'm sure it will be different when I'm actually doing it but I HATE that I over-analyze so much.  I'm a dweller...what can I say.  That's never going to change.  This trip has the potential to be a life changer in the best possible way or send me into a social coma curled up in the fetal position and picking nits off of each other for food.

I cannot let fear become my fact.  I just have to accept that this is what I do.  I freak out, I am and always will be a worst case scenario person.  I will analyze, re-analyze and sometimes I will do something I am uncomfortable with for myself and/or for others.  And yes, sometimes I will chicken out.  If someone asked me if I would do a hot air balloon ride again, would I?  In a hot second with the right company.  Because for as crappy an entrance as I made into the basket and the 2 days of walking funny afterward, that isn't the first thing I remember.  I think of the 52 minutes of floating over green valleys, seeing other balloons in the air around us, the sun rising over the mountain and how I can't help but smile every time I hear Fifth Dimension's "Up Up and Away."  I know the same will likely be true for this regardless of how terrified I am.

FYI-  Under my instruction, the Mr booked it.  Now if I back out, we lose $65.

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Psyching myself out

I have been "training" for stand up paddle for about 8 months.  I use a Reebok Balance Board (affiliate link)  and a kayak paddle.  When I got sidetracked due to my injury, my balance suffered immensely.  I have thankfully recovered the balance and feel like I'm about as ready as I can be...physically.

Mentally, I'm a friggin' mess.  I have had crying fits just thinking about doing this.  I know this is something the Mr really wants to do with me and I want to do it for him but I am terrified.  The part that terrifies me is actually getting on the board.  I've watched the Mr's video of him getting on and he fell a few times but you know, the Virgo in me feels like I shouldn't fall or I should do it perfectly the first time.  I am almost paralyzed with fear at the thought of other people watching me attempt to get up or whipping out their phone and ending up a viral video.  I know, that is completely insane to let those things get to me and I would tell someone else in my same situation to not deny themselves or their spouse the happiness of doing something like that together.

I remember when the Mr did the stand up paddle in 2010 and I watched him paddle off with the instructor. I went in the truck and cried not just because of how proud I was of him but how disappointed I was with myself.  I told myself that the next time I went, I would do it for him.  The fact is, I'm not just doing it for him.  I WANT to do it but it's easier to shift the blame to take the heat off of yourself.  I said I wanted to be 250 when I did it and I'm just over 20 lbs away from that so there's excuse #2.  It doesn't matter in the grand scheme of it all because the Mr was just over 300 lbs when he did it so the weight limit isn't a valid excuse.  When we go I will be 100 lbs less than the last time I was there.  Problem is, I sure as hell don't feel 100 lbs lighter than when I was there last.  I feel like I am just as big, just as insecure and just as pathetic.  THAT is where this all stems from.

Then the Mr mentioned snorkeling...one of his favorite things.  A new terror took over me at the thought of going onto a beach in my bathing suit.  I know...what do I give a shit?  I mean really, I don't usually care what people think that I know but I'm going to not do something because a stranger might say something, record it, make some kind of noise at me even though there are people bigger than I am who would be on the beach.  I've cried the whole time I've written this post because I know that even though the Mr says it wouldn't matter to him if I didn't do it, I know it would no matter how many times he says it wouldn't.  I've seen his excitement and he's talked about nothing else when we refer to this trip.  I think of how because of my big, stupid ass last year's anniversary surprise fell through and I'm afraid I'll be writing the same kind of thing at the end of this trip because I'm really not much thinner than I was last year...18 lbs to be exact so yeah, that's not going to make a difference.  (No, my measurements are not different either.  I've lost 2" in my gut in 18 months!)  I'm crying because I get these wonderful emails from people telling me what an inspiration I am and this behavior and the idea of letting you all down is far from inspiring.

So I get to sit here for the next few months in panic mode releasing stress hormones into my system which makes getting more weight off by the trip virtually impossible.  There is no amount of pep talking, reasoning, logic or whatever that gets through to me on this.  I will probably just force myself to do it and people can film me puking all over the instructor.  Then by the time I come back I can be a web star with my own auto-tuned video of me yakking and re-yakking on him.  I'm tired of ruining everything new and different that the Mr and I can finally do because I'm mentally an idiot who feels like she can't just gonad up.  I need to find a way to stop this anticipatory stress because it's not helping to have my heart beating out of my chest or getting dizzy or whatever.  Ugh...I suck.

Have you been in a similar situation?  If so, what activity/event was paralyzing you with fear or doubt?

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Trashed dinner, country club pizzas & open house don'ts

I surprised the Mr Friday night by going to a muscle car show that was rolling through town.  This is big because even though my grandpa restored old cars, that gene did not get passed down to me.  Not even the slightest interest.  So it was one of those things akin to a person not liking sports taking their dude to their favorite basketball/football/whatever ball game.  I smiled, took pics and was glad I chose Friday because that meant it wasn't digging into our Saturday.  Then he surprised me with movie night at home where he suffered through Working Girl while we cuddled on a blanket on the floor.  (Can you tell we've taken recent oaths to kick it up in the romance department?)

Saturday morning he surprised me with chocolate croissants for breakfast in bed and it was a great way to start the day.  By the time we finally rolled out of bed, we had a seriously hard time coming up with where we wanted to eat for lunch.  I knew I was going to make my stuffed burgers for dinner so that left us open for lunch.  I wasn't craving a damn thing because usually if I crave something, I make it.  I was kind of craving IHOP's Cinnastax pancakes with eggs but I looked up its nutritional info and I almost fainted.  I knew I could make it for a minimum of half the calories but I needed a break from cooking so I wasn't in the mood to bust out the skillets.  It's almost a blessing and a curse being a good cook because you know how much crap they put in restaurant food and you know you can make it so much healthier (and often times tastier) at home and it kind of ruins you for restaurants.  So we ended up going to a generic steakhouse that had a massive salad bar that sounded good.    We checked out a new high end grocery store downtown and got an ice cream pint to go with our cake slices and by the time we ran errands (including getting our Trader Joe's and Target runs done so we wouldn't have to get up early Sunday for once) it was late for dinner.  I asked twice if the Mr was really hungry or not because I was still full.  He was being wishy washy and leaned toward yes because he wanted something other than sugar in his belly.  So I made it all...my stuffed burgers and baked fries.  Forty minutes of prep time and 9pm before we sat down and I took one bite of the burger with my already full stomach and I was about 2 seconds from throwing up.  I threw it all in the trash and skipped dinner.  I think it's been a LONG time since I've done that.  I still felt like yak when I went to bed so even though it was a big victory, it still didn't feel like it.  I just felt gross and what's worse is I woke up feeling gross so that's an awesome way to start off the next day...not.

Sunday we slept in and my back paid for it.  My lower back and shoulder blades were so sore.  I knew we had to go to our last grocery store but we had to pick up the Mr's car from the shop so we went there then met at the grocery store.  We came back home and I made lunch.  We grabbed some Pizza Formaggio's from Trader Joe's the night before to try for lunch and they were SO good!

They reminded me of a french bread pizza taste and the Mr said they reminded him of summers at the country club when he was a kid.  Well pardon me while I play the grand piano.

I paired that with some fruit salad made with the leftover cantaloupe, pineapple and half a blood orange.  I felt like Dexter cutting it up.

We went to a couple of open houses.  Thankfully nothing I fell in love with.  The one looked AMAZING online but in person it was obvious they elongated the pics or something because that huge living room didn't look so huge anymore and the kitchen that I said I wouldn't have to do anything to suddenly looked like a lot more work.  The basement was non-existent and what did exist was a rank ass kitty litter box that smelled like 2 years of chit from that mangy but friendly cat they had walking around left as a welcome present.  The Mr nearly darted out of the basement from it because his allergies kicked in pretty bad.  When will people learn they can't leave cats especially in their home when they are having open houses?  The lady behind us was leaving because she was allergic as well and couldn't stay in the house.  The next house was nice but the layout was poor from the kitchen and it was overpriced because the owner rehabbed it and decided to stay and brag about it to the people who came in after us.  That's another huge pet peeve.  If you're the owner, don't stay in the house while there's an open house.  I feel very uncomfortable when they do that and when you have people either use booties on your precious floor or take off your shoes, it makes me want to turn around and not even go through it.  It reminds me of the first time we encountered that and it turned out to be a stuck up wench I went to high school with because they left their pics up all over the house...pet peeve #3. Do you people NOT watch HGTV!?  Anyhoo.  Enough of my griping.

Dinner was yummy roasted red pepper, pineapple and bbq chicken naan pizza with chipotle cheddar bites.  I still love watching the Mr's eyes roll in the back of his head on that one.  It is so good.  Homemade naan is on the culinary to do list this year.

What did you do this weekend?

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Late weigh in

Sorry I'm late with the weigh in this morning (or Sunday morning for those of you subscribing by email).

Down like 1 1/2 lbs.  I really hate that I've gone from my not counting the decimals to counting them.  It used to be if I was 283.4 lbs and went down to 281.8 I'd be all "I lost 2 lbs!" because I'd only count the whole number.  Since I acknowledged last weeks decimal does this mean I have to that from now on?  Because I'd really rather say I went from 274 to 272 and not 274.0 to 272.8.

Sorry, I'm high on chocolate croissant the Mr served me in bed for breakfast.  Yay for romance!

I'll shut up now.  Regardless, going down and I would be THRILLED if I could get out of the 70's by the end of the month.  Fingers crossed!

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Google Reader, virtual mooning and Food Journal Friday

In case you're not on my Facebook page, I wanted to make sure Google Reader subscribers were aware that they are doing away with it on July 1st.  If you'd like to still follow me and your favorite bloggers in a reader, you can do so at Blog Lovin'.  If you like, just click the Blog Lovin' button at the bottom of my social media buttons on the right sidebar and you can get to switchin'.  They make it really easy by importing your subscriptions in a few simple steps when you sign up.  This is where I would normally bash the powers that be for not leaving well enough alone by forcing me and others to find alternate readers but I'm afraid they'd drop my search rank so I'll just virtually moon them.

(__|__)

You're wanting to see the eats, aren't ya?  Oh okay, you twisted my arm!  Let's eat!

Sunday was a ground chicken Mexican tostada with some TJ's enchilada sauce, hot taco sauce, chipotle hummus, arugula and 1/4 cup cheddar cheese with a side of mini chipotle potato bites, of course.  It was GOOD!  Calories:  696

Monday was spicy grilled sea scallops over thai lime rice and a side of grilled green beans.  I'm always so nervous about cooking scallops.  Underdone and you could be in the bathroom all night... overdone and you are eating rubber.  Thankfully these were perfect!  Go me!  Calories:  461

Tuesday was leftover so the same tostada (why do I keep typing toastada!!?!?) and brussels with asiago cheese.  Calories:  656

Wednesday was lemon pepper pasta with crab alfredo sauce.  It was might yummy and first for that dish.  Calories:  560

Thursday was spicy baked tilapia over TJ's carrot and spinach polenta with a side of brussels with half a piece of crumbled bacon and asiago cheese.  Calories:  680

Tonight's dinner will be Mahi Mahi fish taco with a side of brussels, bacon and asiago.  Calories:  495

I'm not concrete in our plans for the weekend but I'm sure we can scrape something up.

What's on tap for your weekend?  Are you ready for Spring to start next week?

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Doctor! Doctor!

Just to clarify, you should read the title ala Thompson Twins version of Doctor! Doctor! and not Robert Palmer's Doctor, Doctor (Give Me the News)

Yes, I saw the Thompson Twins in concert as a child...I may or may not have been wearing a silver sequined tube top....and jelly shoes.  But that's not the point.

I was checking my calendar and realized I have quite a few doctors appointments coming up in the next two weeks.  The Mr and I are getting physicals next week.  He was reminded after a visit last week that last year we never returned for physicals after having some stupid consultation with a doctor we've seen for well over 10 years.  Because I was denied out of town treatment by her when I was sick in San Francisco three years ago, I figured I'd better get it done so I'm not considered a "new" patient.  Red tape blows.  Back in the day, you could go six years without seeing your doctor, call in and say you have the creeping crud and they'd call in a prescription.  I know she's going to go over last years bloodwork where all she told me was we need to talk about my cholesterol.  If she tries to put me on meds, she'll be cut off before she even gets it out of her mouth.  I don't have diabetes, high blood pressure and a good resting heart rate and putting myself at risk for the other side effects from cholesterol meds is not an option for me.  I've been eating my chia, oatmeal and other natural cholesterol lowering foods so I will continue with that and know with more weight loss will help get it down.  I'm not a "throw a pill at it" kind of person and if it was dangerously high I have to imagine she would've said "you need to get on meds or die" and since that didn't happen...no thanks.

Then two days later I have my follow up with my chiro, Johnny Angel.  It'll have been a month since I've seen him.  He said I'm diligent with my exercises and stretches, which I am and cleared me for all exercise based on pain.  Like an asshat, I did some Power 90, which is pretty tame in the impact department and my muscles hated me for days and we decided to do our recovery half week off.  I felt so much better and because I felt better, I forgot myself and did some jumping jacks during one of my favorite Turbo Fire moves and my foot said "no mas por favor!"  It was sore for a few days following.  I got really frustrated with it and cried like a dork.   We walked for a LONG time Saturday and some on Sunday and thankfully I was only a little sore.  Tuesday I did this killer rowing circuit that puts direct pressure from the straps on the area where the affected muscles come together.  Thankfully I had no soreness from it, so that's very encouraging.  I'm doing my balance board 5-6x week so I'm building up the strength there too.  It's all so tedious but I have to be vigilant about it all.  I'll be interested to see what he says.  I think I may only have one appointment left with him after that.

Then the following week I have my annual gynie appointment.  The Mr will come with me and I'll wait far too long to get in...actually maybe I'll call ahead and see how far behind she's running this year before making the trek across town.  I don't mind that she's late because she's the best gynie in town and it means she actually takes her time with patients and she'll do the same with me.  I'll just have to remember to take Gas-X because you know how it is when they give you the "scoot" command those veggies you had for lunch try to rear up on you.  Or your gut growls because you didn't want to eat veggies or anything before your appointment.  I know it's never happened but I don't want "farter" to be written on my chart.

I got a postcard reminder that I need to go to the eye doctor.  Oy!  I suppose I should do that too at some point.

How often do you go to the doctor?  If you don't, why?

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Last on the bandwagon

I finally jumped on the bandwagon.  What bandwagon?  The frozen grapes bandwagon!

I know, I know, I'm the last person on Earth to jump on this but I love grapes so much on their own, the thought of freezing them made me cringe!  But this sad, crappy bunch was starting to get a little squishy before their time and the thought of throwing them out ticked me off because I hate wasting money.  Then I thought don't throw them away, throw 'em in the freezer!

I did and what can I say, they taste like...icy grapes.  Nothing mind blowing like some people seem to think they are but a different way to eat them if your grapes are starting to go south.  

Have you been the last one to jump on a bandwagon?  If so, what was it?  (Frozen grapes?  A food craze?  An exercise craze?  Boycotting a show while it's disgustingly popular only to watch it once it's cancelled or in its last season and realize you love it)

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What a crock

I need some help y'all.  (Like you didn't already know that.)

Perhaps you remember when I revealed my beautiful grandmother is going through stages of dementia.  Well, my aunt is at her winter home with her for vacation and reported back that she's declining.  The weight of all everyday activities is falling on my grandpa who, if the truth be told, isn't the picture of perfect health himself at over 80 years old.  Unfortunately grandma can't cook anymore and he never learned so it's restaurants for them most of the time and he doesn't like eating out for every meal.  So we're going to have to do some things to help ensure they get some home cooked meals and I said I could go over once or twice a week to assemble something in a crock pot.

Then I realized I don't have a whole lot of recipes that appeal to the older adult palate...aka-bland.

Obviously I'll have to do some research as well going through websites and such but I thought maybe I would check with my peeps and tone down any spices or things I know they wouldn't eat.

What are your go to crock pot recipes?

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Sodium bombs, new duds and open house love

Weekends are never long enough, are they?

Remember when I mentioned the Mr's sodium was out of control in my weigh in Saturday?  Well I decided to do some investigating in his FitDay to see what the culprit could be other than the things we already suspected.  I did a sodium breakdown by food and saw his salad dressing was coming up as 800mg and I knew that wasn't right as he purposely only gets things under 300mg.  Well, it would help if someone would put they're having 2 tablespoons instead of 2 SERVINGS of something.  The thing is, he doesn't even have 2 full tablespoons of dressing because it won't fit into his little holder so he's been screwing himself on Zesty Italian for who knows how long.  So that knocked 600mg off then we're going to have him finish off the Laughing Cows and won't replenish that supply.  He was using unauthorized Ole High Fiber tortillas (you know, the ones I buy for fish tacos and chicken quesadillas?) for lunches and they recently SERIOUSLY jacked up their sodium to 350mg and lowered the fiber so buh bye.  Instead, we bought Tumaro's low carb tortillas and they have 60mg of sodium and 80 calories or something like that.  They taste like stale cardboard on their own but I always stuff 'em with something good so we'll just have to adjust.  His 460mg cottage cheese went byebye for grody low salt kind for the protein and to keep him fuller during the day.  We got some pre-portioned raw almonds from TJ's to help balance the cheese we're having to cut out from his lunches.  He's required to pre-plan all of his meals the night before so he can pay attention to the sodium. So hopefully this helps...it already has for today's food...under 1900mg of sodium!

I got some tops for the trip in a few months from Avenue and low and behold they actually had some cute tops that weren't all cap sleeves!  Hallelujah!

I got a black and light blue ruched polo shirt which makes my chestage area look pretty dang good with an underwire bra and the crossover v-neck shirts actually have sleeves!  Those are really flattering so I picked up four of those.  That should about do me for a while. They're just fitted enough that even if I went down another size they'd probably still look okay so I think they'll last me a while.

We came up with a great Total Trainer/Free Weight hybrid workout yesterday.  The Mr wants to do more rower workouts so he found a good one on Shape.com of all places and he's going to do that tomorrow.

We went to two open houses and fell in love twice.  We may need to stop doing that.  The place we fell in love with last week?  Gone.  The area we're looking in barely has any inventory and when they do, they snatch 'em up.  Sigh.

What did you do this weekend?

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Semantics- Weigh in

Down almost a pound.  Last week I was 274.8 and now I'm solid 274.0.  I never count the decimals in a number so what I write on the calendar will be the same but mentally I need to acknowledge the .8 lb because I've been uber bloated this week and was expecting a 2 lb gain or something.  Sometimes semantics are in order.

We're going to do a little revamp of our diets.  I'm hooked on the "pink stuff" and have been trying to get off of it in my tea by doing one packet of Sweet and Low and one packet of Stevia to try to ween myself.  I tried straight up Stevia and I'm not there yet.  (FYI- Target now carries a Market Pantry brand of stevia so it's less expensive than Truvia and the others.)  We're also going to stop buying sugar free jello and sugar free pudding.  I know those have artificial sweeteners and when I looked at the delicious pudding ingredients, I saw "partially hydrogenated" twice and that's not good.  I'll make our own pudding from chocolate and skim milk if we want it bad enough.  The Mr's sodium is out of control so we're going to cut some things (buh bye regular cottage cheese, hello my nasty no sodium cottage cheese for protein's sake and so long Laughing Cow "cheese.")  We'll add some almonds and he needs to up his protein so we're going to sit down tomorrow and come up with a plan before we head to the grocery for our produce fuel up.

Still no idea what we're doing today but it's sunny and gorgeous and we're heading out somewhere!  Hope you guys have an awesome weekend!

Have you been surprised by what's "snuck" into your diet?

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Chaotic closet and this week's eats

I got some kind of itch to organize yesterday.  I was tired of opening the linen closet door and seeing controlled chaos so I dove in.  If you follow me and my sporadic Instagram musings then you saw that I had crap like 4 year expired cough medicine and such.  That seemed to be the common theme in things we would take and wonder why they wouldn't work.  Oh, you mean in order for Tylenol PM to work it mustn't be expired for 3 years?? 

But after a few hours of going through it and finally pitching crap I was holding on to but held on to for so long they went rancid, I got the after pic on the right.  Yeah that's right apparently Bath and Body Works long discontinued Daffodil Fields will smell like stale ass if you leave it to rot in the back of your linen closet.  Same with Avon's long discontinued Aromatherapy splash which now smells like bathroom cleaner.  Sigh.

I also found a buttload of expired prescription and OTC meds.  Since flushing is a big no no, I put them all in a plastic baggie while I went through the closet and then put veggie scraps in with them when I threw them away in the trash.

It looks SOO much better in there and I don't fear for my life anymore when opening the door.  

Now, let's get to the eats.

Sunday was chicken tacos with arugula and a side of brussels.  Calories:  596

Monday was crab stuffed flounder and a side of brussels.  Calories: 448

Tuesday I blew it up fancy pants style yo and made black pepper crusted filet mignon with caramelized onions, purple roasted garlic mashed potatoes and a Hawaiian sweet roll.  Calories:  760

Wednesday was three pepper chili with low sodium oyster crackers and asiago and a slice of toasted asiago peppercorn sourdough from TJ's.  Calories:  593

Thursday was leftover chili and the last of the cracker with a side of brussels.  Calories:  641

So that's the excitement to round out my week.  I don't think we have specific plans for the weekend yet but it's supposed to be 60 degrees and my butt is gonna be out and about.  I have no expectations for the scale tomorrow as Aunt Flo has taken to swinging from the rafters and bloating me like a puffer fish.  *grumble*

Got any plans for the weekend?  Have you cleaned out any closets?  When you clean out one area, does it inspire you to tackle other organization projects or take it all out of you?

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What I'm Reading Lately

I just realized I haven't done one of these in a while so I thought I'd catch you up on what I've been clicking on.

Tips for Working Out at Home

Top 50 Date Night Ideas

5 Tips on Eating Meat and Still Stay Healthy

Exercise Leads to Better Sleep

What Your Cravings Say About Your Health

Salt May Be Risk Factor for MS and Other Auto-Immune Diseases

Household Items to Help Lose Weight

What to Eat Before and After a Workout

Intuitive Training for Fitness

17 Health Benefits of Sex  (Who knew you could save you or your partners life by bumpin' uglies?)

What have you been reading lately?  Anything good?

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You're not hiding in plain sight

Pretty much my whole life, I wore clothes that were baggy to "hide" my weight.  I think a good amount of us do this and think we're getting away with looking thinner by not wearing form fitting clothes.  I mean really, who wants to have shirts clinging to their rolls, lumps and bumps?  If we're wearing a tent, surely people won't think we even have rolls, lumps and bumps, right?   WRONG!  I see this all the time on weight loss shows or even just in real life passing people at the mall or whatever.  People with weight problems wearing clothes a size (or two!) bigger than they are because they think they're fooling someone but trust me, we're only fooling ourselves people.  I'll use this pic as an example...

463 lbs on left /  356 lbs on right

That wasn't even my heaviest on the left, I'd lost about 30 lbs from my highest weight and thought I looked good.  Yike.  Anyhoo...note the non-descript square man's t-shirt, baggy elastic jeans and (swallowing yak) Crocs.  (In my defense, Crocs were about the only thing my fat club feet would fit in at that time, it was not a fashion statement!)  Now at that weight, I likely wouldn't have worn something more form fitting but you can see that it does nothing but convey how big I am.  A shapeless blob kind of look is always so attractive, no?

The pic on the right is 107 lbs later and while losing weight always certainly helps, this is the first outfit I FORCED myself to buy that was cut for a woman.  I don't mean form fitting or anything but a shirt that actually had shape when it was on the bed like coming in a little toward the top, accommodating for the hips but lays flat in the front so it doesn't bell out so a rogue bird couldn't fly up the front like in a man's shirt and it even has some silvery stitching around the bottom, neckline and arms to make it look like I was trying.  The jeans aren't skin tight but fit well in comparison to the clown jeans on the left.  I'm not saying there is a massive difference between the two but one is definitely more flattering than the other even if I'm not overly jazzed about how I looked in either one.

It was so difficult for me to finally grasp just what kind of injustice I was doing my body even if I was nowhere near goal.  I couldn't believe how many compliments I got and how many people began asking again if I was losing more weight just based on how my shirts were cut.  I have some pretty good arm dangle going on and am so self conscious of it but it's hard to find women's shirts that don't have those stupid cap sleeves on them.  So I just bit the bullet, bought some Old Navy shirts so I didn't spend too much on them and forced myself to wear them in 2010.  That year to our family reunion I wore one of them and my cousin who I see pretty frequently said that was when he REALLY noticed my weight loss (even though it was slowing down at that point) and it inspired him to get his act together a few months later.  It can still be a struggle for me to wear shirts with sleeves shorter than I would make them but I force myself to do it because it's entirely too easy to go back to "hiding" in plain sight behind big ol' baggy tees.  Don't get me wrong, I have a TON of tees I wear around the house but when I go out in public I try to go outside my comfort zone with clothes because baggy looks sloppy...period.  That is not what I want to present to people.  Even if I wear a jacket or cardigan, I always want my base piece to be a little more fitted and if I'm wearing something super fitting (rare) then I break out the Spanx!  (Even the thinnest of celebs proudly proclaim their love of Spanx...no shame, yo!)

So I challenge you, if you're guilty of buying everything in a size or two bigger than you are or buy men's clothes to cloak your figure, buy at least one new shirt with a flattering cut.  Experiment and try on things that you would never wear in a million years and take pics of yourself in the dressing room.  I do this all the time because what I see in the mirror seriously does NOT look the same as it does in pics.  It's easier to identify your better attributes when you have a different perspective other than the mirror.  (I mean really, how many times have we walked out the door thinking we were looking pretty good that day and saw a pic from the same day and thought, "WTH!?!?!")

Do you wear baggy clothes to hide your figure?

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Fancy pants food and flexin' muscles

I got all fancy pants with my fruit salad yesterday...

Yes, apparently all I need to consider my fruit salad "fancy pants" are raspberries and a slice of star fruit.  I'm also apparently very easy to please food wise.

We tried sweet potato tots from TJ's.  They were really good but I wished they had a little more crunch to them.  I think I'll throw them under the broiler for a minute or two before serving next time.  But if you have a TJ's in your area, give them a go!  A nice change of pace.

I finally got around to trying the Toasted Asiago crackers from Kashi.  They're going to the Mr's work tomorrow.  I don't taste asiago and I suspect before they became crackers they were used to pack someone's belongings in for a cross country move.  Not a fan and big disappointment because I was really looking forward to those things.

Sunday night we did our first Total Trainer session since our recovery break.  Oh my Lord!  I was so sore yesterday especially in my calves from the balance board work I did afterward.  I knew I was going to need to stretch really well so I didn't take it into today.  That's so insane how quickly your muscles get a little lax from a few days off.  I am glad that the muscles I have worked so hard on have held up.  I really hope that fat flap tightens up a bit.  I can see reshaping happening but it's never quick enough.  The Mr's muscles are coming along quite nicely as well...

The Mr. flexin' his guns!

Rawr!  :-D

Have you tried any new foods lately?  You getting some muscles coming in you're particularly proud of?

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A sweet gift and the perfect home

Late last week, we got a very sweet card from the friend who gave a new home to our treadmill.  After we stopped drooling over her absolutely flawless penmanship, we saw the gift inside.

Does she know us or what?  She's such a great girl and said she hoped I could make something delicious.  So when we did our grocery haul yesterday, I got a filet mignon that I'll coat in a peppercorn crust, sear off and finish in the oven tomorrow night.  We also splurged on a bag of dark chocolate peanut butter salted caramel truffles which taste like heaven.  I also ended up grabbing some pesto gouda which is going to be AMAZING in something; I haven't quite decided what I'm going to do with it. It took off a good chunk of our bill which we were grateful for.  Even when I think I'm spending less, I still end up with $120-$150 worth of stuff from that place.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned that we're open house junkies.  If we don't have anything planned for a Sunday, we'll go out and about in what I'm hoping will be our future neighborhood and see what's out there.  There have only been two homes that have given us that pit in our stomach that it could be "the one."  One of those was yesterday.  It stinks when we find a place that feels right.  There were a few signs that someone up there was trying to make us think long and hard about phoning the agent to see if they would consider a contingent offer.  They have our exact same bathroom mirror which isn't one of kind but also not common, our specific bamboo blinds and even a little hedgehog painted in the kids room.  (The "hoggie" was our dog's favorite toy, she was buried with it.)  It had room for an 80's arcade and a home gym which are both prerequisites.  The kitchen would need to be gutted because, well, it's ugly but lots of natural light for picture taking.  Sigh.  I know, some people would say "jump on it!"  But unfortunately there is shaky ground at the Mr's work which means making life changing decisions isn't a good idea right now.  The house won't be on the market long.  This particular area is in the city and never suffered the effects of the recession.    But I do make sure I keep the addresses of the places that give us that "willy in the tummy" feeling and when we're ready to sell and make the leap, we'll see if by some planet aligning coincidence they're on the market again.  Something tells me people aren't in their homes as long as we have...almost 17 years.

It was a nice weekend.  I spent some quality time with the Mr and we had fun going shopping.  It was certainly better than last weekend when we almost choked each other from boredom.

What did you do this weekend?  Anything fun?  Boring?  In between?

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