That's my view sitting at my seat at the Jake Shimabukruro concert Saturday. I took the pic and I looked at it and I thought, "I remember in 2007 when I went to a musical for my cousin and sat there terrified the seats were going to give in under our weight and having bruises on my hips for almost 2 weeks after that from bolts digging in."
I remember being heartbroken on having to miss out on two different times Duran Duran came to town because I was petrified I wouldn't fit in the seats or that people would say something to me and ruin the evening. This summer I'm driving to see them in another city because I'm tired of missing out on seeing the band that was my first crush as a little girl. 2nd row thankyouverymuch. I'll be the girl getting dragged out on the encore for trying to lick Nick Rhodes' face. I doubt I'll be able to hold back tears of finally making that dream a reality. I even decided what the hell and we're driving to see another band this year because mama used to do this quite a bit as a teenager and I miss it. I miss feeling like the people are singing just to you. I remember being at the Popmart Tour for U2 in 1997 and I swear that even at the top of the stadium in the worst seats ever, Bono was singing "One" only to me as the 102,000 people faded away.
I think it was 2 years ago that I realized I could just fit back into auditorium seats and while I knew I could fit, my brain just wasn't havin' it. When I went on a concert ticket buying spree earlier this year, I gave no thought as to whether I fit. I'm certainly not small enough to never have to worry about that again, I mean I know my current weight after losing 200 lbs is still another person's "before" picture. But the freedom of not being completely paralyzed over the thought of going to an arena, auditorium, etc is truly one of the most freeing things in the world.
We enjoyed that concert and even though my seatmate was cool, he kind of impeded on my personal space by sitting with his legs all widespread and the guy on the other side of the Mr was the jolly green giant so he impeded on his space with his wicked tall gams. In the end, it was nice to know the fat people, the one expected to lop over and take up extra room, in fact, were not. The skinny people were. While I'm not a big fan of having a random dude's leg bobbing up and down on mine to the beat I didn't care because 1) I was just happy he really dug Jake's music and 2) he had to come over to my side to touch my leg, not because he had to due to my girth. I don't expect many people to relate but that's major. Let the good times roll.
Got any NSV's to celebrate? Shout 'em out in the comments!
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Oh, I can relate! I'm short, only 5'3", but at my heaviest I was always twitching my legs to try to keep them together so I wouldn't impinge on someone else's space. Trouble was, my thighs were so big that to keep my knees together would have required a bungee cord around them. You are more gracious than I would have been--I even shove my husband's legs over if he's in my space in a situation like that. A stranger would have received 'the pig-eye' at the very least, lol.
ReplyDeleteYeah I had the same problem at my heaviest. Even with my thighs pushes together, my knees wouldn't touch. I wasn't overly annoyed with the dude for bobbing his leg on mine. I talked to him briefly before the show when he asked his partner to remind him not to forget his glasses then told me to remind him too and we were laughing. I guess he felt comfortable around me! LOL
DeleteThat is an awesome NSV!!! And don't take it the wrong way, but when you said that was you I seriously looked around at the picture because all I saw was some old lady and a SKINNY GIRL!! Lady, you have made such AMAZING progress! You are just fantastic...there's so many words but none seem to do what you and the Mr. are doing justice. :-) Keep going on those NSV's...and *jealous* - I wanna see Duran Duran!!!! (I went to Depeche Mode several years back as they were MY band as a teenager, and it was amazing...way better live than even on their albums). U2 and DD are both bands I would love to see live...although I did have a dream that me and Bono were best friends once and I swear, it was so realistic that even now when I think about Bono, I feel like I KNOW him. hahahahaha (Okay, that's just between you and I because it's a little creepy...) ;-)
ReplyDeleteOh no dearest, that scrawny girl isn't me! I could've picked my teeth with her. I'm the one taking the picture. ;) Still have a LONG way to go!
DeleteWe saw Depeche Mode back in 1998 and they were awesome! Bono would be awesome to be friends with. I think I would like to be friends with him and his wife and Sting and Trudie so we could have friends that we could be in awe of at their contributions to making the world better and having the money to back it up. (Well that and Sting lives in a castle and has a winery/olive oil company and I bet he send friends home with both after a soiree!)
Excellent NSV! Good for you!
ReplyDeleteThat is so awesome!
ReplyDeleteI can just picture you getting "ma'am-ed" for trying to tongue bathe Nick Rhodes. ("ma'am-ed" is what my sister and I call it when we envision being kindly reprimanded for poor behavior, usually by someone younger than us: example: "Ma'am, can you please stop licking Mr. Rhodes.")
My NSV as of late? I bought a bathing suit bottom in a size MEDIUM. No joke, I checked the tag three times and then checked the rack to make sure I didn't accidentally have a "maternity" medium or something.
Well, you know I TOTALLY get it! Amusement park anyone = ) That's awesome, and I'm really glad you're going out to see bands again. Is there anything greater than LIVE music?
ReplyDeleteAwesome NSV--those really are the BEST indicators of progress, aren't they? Seeing a lower number on the scale is great, don't get me wrong, but it's what that number translates into: being able to DO the things that our weight has held us back from, either in reality or in our minds. My latest NSV? Getting brave enough to sign up to play on a softball team for the first time in well over 30 years and not worrying that everyone would be rolling their eyes at the fat girl trying to play. Might still suck at softball, but it won't be because of my weight!
ReplyDeleteThat's an awesome NSV and it must feel so great to have that perspective of how far you have come! Great job. Enjoy your summer of concerts! :)
ReplyDeleteThat is awesome! There are so many little things you miss out on and you really come to appreciate these things that everyone else takes for granted. And how cool that you're going to see Duran Duran. I am jealous! And now I have The Reflex stuck in my head, of all songs. :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on sitting comfortably in a concert chair!! Oh how I long for the day for that to happen for me! You were fully able to enjoy the concert without having that nagging worry (or pain)about the chair breaking or being uncomfortable. Way to go!!
ReplyDeleteAs for my NSV, I would say it's surviving a car crash that my husband, dog and I were in on Saturday. My car is totaled, but we are ok. My knee and boob are horrifically bruised and my ribs hurt (not broken), but those things can heal. Number One--the dog is just fine! Watched him like a hawk and he's as happy as a clam! Car decided to turn in front of us in an intersection during a rainstorm--it was ugly. Now having to have a car payment is going to suck, but we'll manage. It was hard to say goodbye to the old gal though--that car has a lot of memories for me. Sigh...
Thanks for clarifying the NSV, I didn't know what that was. My triglicerides are normal now, that's a victory! Have a great day!
ReplyDeleteWhat a fabulous NSV! I had the same when we went to see U-2 last summer.
ReplyDeleteI totally, totally, totally relate. I don't go to concerts or certain restaurants anymore because I don't fit in the seats. I'm terrified of our upcoming trip to Wrigley because I know I won't fit (I didn't fit at 314 pounds, and I'm 340 right now). One of my biggest goals is losing enough weight to feel comfortable out in public again. So many people take venue seats for granted. Not me... I panic every time Brent wants to go somewhere unfamiliar.
ReplyDeleteI am SO happy for YOU!!!
ReplyDeleteOver the last several months you've brought to my attention the idea of 'set point' with regard to weight, and the image other people hold in their minds... and the image we hold of ourselves. My latest NSVs have to do with this... I once again fit through spaces I think I do (in the last couple of years I'd move to pass through a space and find myself 'stuck' and embarrased), and people don't move out of my way when they see me coming. I also don't find myself flinching and worrying about chairs... I once again sit wherever I darn well please. I have a renewed sense of freedom in the world.
What a great NSV! I remember all too well the 'will I fit?' anxiety before venturing out to public events. I remember even more the first time I wandered into a classroom setting and FIT in one of those awful desk chairs! I was so excited, I asked a classmate (a perfect stranger) to take a picture of me fitting in the chair. Nerdy? Yes, but I wanted to share that moment with my readers who understood.
ReplyDelete