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Wednesday, November 16, 2011

People amaze me...

...and often not in a good way.

There are few things more personal to someone than their own weight loss adventure.  What works for me/us, may not work for you and you know what?  That's okay!  There is no one right way to eat.  (Obviously the Twinkie diet or 'diets' of dangerous meds that have been proven to have unsettling side effects are not the route to take for long term results)  I saw where someone jumped on another blogger for "sneaking" healthy things into their Thanksgiving side dish.  Are you serious!?  I am so sick of people jumping on the latest food diet fad or just getting started with their plan, lose a few pounds and preaching to others that they aren't eating correctly.  This blogger has lost over 90 lbs, I think she knows how to do this without your help Ms. Nosey!  Or the whole veggie people vs. meat eaters.  I totally respect both sides.  I could never be vegan because it's just not for me but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy eating vegan dishes.  Does this make me some kind of traitor to my meat lovin' brethren?  No!  It just means I like the diversity that being open to any kind of eating brings.  It's FOOD people.  Have we really gotten so self righteous about food that like politics and religion we can no longer discuss food in polite company?  I am sorry for this midweek rant but it had to be said.

I get that we all have opinions and are excited about the way we eat but when you force your opinions on others and make it an issue of right or wrong, you will always be wrong.  If we all were clones and had the exact same metabolism, genes, environmental circumstances and were basically drones then yes, we would all follow the same regimen to lose weight.  But thank God we're all different and while it may be frustrating that everyone else seems to be losing faster than you are and it may take longer than someone else to reach your fitness goal, as long as you can honestly say you're doing everything you can to go in the right direction, that's all you can do.  You need to be open to new ideas when things stall but you don't need to listen to someone try to chisel at your self esteem because they feel the need to have a pissing contest.  I'm urging all of us to remember that while you can be excited about your plan because it's working for you to remember that your plan is not for everyone and there is no "right and wrong" when it comes down to it.  In the end, we all have the same goal which is good physical and emotional health and the eating plan that gets us there is our own.

Has anyone ever tried to tell you what to eat?  How do you handle it?

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  1. There's always someone who has a better way!!

    I thank them, think about what they said to see if it's going to help me in any way and then I move on and do what I want anyway!!

  2. oh boy. With Thanksgiving coming up this can of worms is so open for me right now. (hmmmm - I wonder if worms are healthy?) I'll just have to grin and bear it, I won't be responsible for a family feud.

    When I started bringing lunch to work though I started getting lots of attention. People started looking at my plate, asking questions amazing how many people don't know what fresh mango looks like, and making comments. It shook me at first, but then I got used to it.

  3. I don't get how people can criticize other people's habit when we are all working towards the same goal. We should be praising each other for changing our lives.

  4. I always try to remember this phrase:

    Opinions are like assh*les. Everybody has one.

    Our friendly sparkly site is a hotbed of know-it-alls and you're-doing-it-wrongers. If I see it on the message boards I just try to leave a comment that reinforces positives (reminding folks that any "healthy" change is good, and you can always change more later).

    If I get really annoyed, I blog about it. There need to be more folks who use their "sparkly" blogs to critique things they read on the site.

    In real life, I just go with a generic "whatever works for you" reply and keep on keeping on.

  5. I try never to judge what people are eating because I so don't always "stick" to what I "think I should"! I love food. I love comfort food. What works for one doesn't always work for others. I too am tired of people jumping on and off the wagon. Or trying the latest diet or workout because it worked for someone else. It doesn't mean it is going to work for you. And don't judge others! You don't know, you just don't know what is going on with them.

    Thanks for keeping it real! I haven't been on the "other" site in a while. Tired of the drama!

  6. I don't know what it is about human nature that refuses to live and let live, but there you have it. We continually try to win people over to our way of thinking, our faith, our political values, our social soapboxes, our brand of car, washer, bread, our methods of marriage and parenting dynamics, our tools and ideals in relationships. The list is endless. There's a verse of scripture that I love. (Even if one does not believe the bible, there is much wisdom to be garnered from it, as with almost any great literary work.) It says: Men despise that which they do not understand. Isn't that spot on? If I don't understand your needs and desires, I don't like them. Period. How pompous and petty is that? lol God save us from shying away from diversity and help us to celebrate each other in all our differences. Part of respecting and valuing others is acknowledging their ability to discover what is right for them and following that path. As so often happens, you give me a nugget to chew on and it grows and expands in my head. I'll be gnawing on this idea for a while to come. Thank you!

  7. I agree with you 100%, and I actually wrote a post about this yesterday. Having blogged for just over 5 weeks you wouldn't believe the emails I've gotten. People go crazy!

  8. I can't say I'm "glad" that people understand but it's good to know that people get what I'm talking about.

    Maren- Sadly this is why I have no contact info. That lasted 2 days and the douches that decided to contact me and disrespect me made it enough for me to say I have no desire for hearing from people who want to criticize me. If someone wants to comment on what I put out there, they can comment and not hide behind an email that no one can see.

  9. I share your sentiment. People have a tendency to believe the grass is greener on the other side but it just grows in a different directions... And it's still grass.

  10. Am I the only one who has a mom that points out ALL the flaws in ANY kind of decision or action plan?

    Also, it's amazing how everyone's mouth is shut until someone tries to step out of the box and make changes in their lives. I'll go straight with Hey-Butt and say, "Everybody has one, is right!" If I opened a tupperware of leftover gooey-cheesy-something, not a sound. Open a tupperware with rice and vegetables, EVERYONE has to look and see what it is, then look at me and assess me. WTH?
    Mrs., I had my wedding rings resized down recently, like you did. Fist pump, right? Do you know both my mom AND my MIL made comments about how badly it'll make me feel WHEN they have to be resized up again. WHEN!!! of all the.... and my MIL added the usueful tip, "Don't wait too long, whatever you do! Mine had to be cut off!!"

    GAH!!!!! I agree. Live and let live.

  11. Everyone has an opinion, and that's fine--until you start telling me I'm 'wrong' for having a different one or (in this case) choosing a different way of eating. I respect people who choose to eat completely 'clean' or go vegan, but I know that for me, trying to follow a rigid plan doesn't work. I usually just smile, say 'thanks for the input,' and move on; it's not worth getting into a fight most days.

  12. Amen! I've received lots of well-intentioned advice, and for most of it I was able to say thanks and move on. I've had more than a couple of comments that annoyed me,though,

    (Btw, thanks bunches for the link to the B-sprouts recipe. I'm definitely going to try it--maybe this weekend.)

  13. I am right there with you, I can't stand when people feel the need to overzealously tell me I'm doing something wrong! Hello i'm encroaching on losing 80 lbs, I think I can handle it! It's different when you ask but for REAL! Plus it really bugs me when people say "but you dont need to lose anymore weight" or "you really think you need to lose 20 more pounds? You'll be a bag of bones". ARG!

  14. Food Police, preachy crap and rude criticism of choices all SUCK.

  15. I'm going to chime in and say that I try really hard not to be the person who says "You know, you'd be a lot better off if you ate this or did this" and the like. I'm only 20 pounds down, but I know the rules even if I don't follow them perfectly. However, I really don't want to be the girl preaching about how someone could eat better or be healthier. I know how pissed I'd be if someone did that to me, so I try very hard to keep my opinions to myself and only impart my "wisdom" if I'm asked for it.

  16. I think I might know the blogger you're referring to. I don't know why people do that. I have definitely had people telling me about what I should or should not be eating. Don't think that just because I am overweight that certain foods are off limits for me. It actually makes my blood boil when I get unsolicited advice from someone telling me about what's good or bad. I normally just say, "I can eat whatever I want." and then walk away.

  17. I have a lot of vegan friends who are always trying to convert me. Is the food good? It can be REALLY good. Thing is, I just classify it as another "ethnic" food - kinda like Indian food. It's good, I enjoy it, but I wouldn't want it every day. I like variety. I also don't think I know enough about nutrition to get a balanced enough diet without it because there are some things that meat provides more easily than veggies (and vice versa).


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