Most people knew Lisa Marie Presley as Elvis' daughter and obviously so did I initially. There was so much written about her in the rag mags back in the day (now every 'news source' feels a rag mag these days, doesn't it?) and therefore much mystery around who she was as a person. I remember very clearly watching her clutching Michael Jackson's hand in terror as they walked out on the MTV VMA stage in 1994 looking like she wanted to be anywhere but there. We were in Las Vegas on a trip with my family and had retired for the night and there were rumors about this appearance so we were glued to the TV. Watching that kiss with the rest of the world, you knew it was going to cause a stir and then there came the famous Diane Sawyer interview with them where you actually got to see Lisa's personality. You could tell she was likely told to act a certain way but man when her personality came out, it was undeniable. She was feisty, snarky, a smart ass, funny and every other trait that was very similar to my own at that time. We were soul sisters on some level personality wise.
When there was talk that she was writing music and recording an album, I couldn't wait. I think everyone was waiting to see how she sounded so they could compare her to her father. Would she 'live up' to her last name like that should even be a thing. Children aren't their parents and should never be compared to them, famous or not. What sealed the deal for me with her was her interview/performance on Letterman while promoting her album. The fact that she went after he basically ragged on her for years and called him out on it within 30 seconds sealed the deal for me. I didn't care if she sang off key and sounded like a cat screeching in an alley, I would support her and buy her records. Luckily, she sounded amazing. A wonderful singer in her own right that sounded nothing like her dad. Her lyrics were raw and unapologetic and people picked them apart looking for who she could be referring to. I didn't care who she was talking about, I just knew I hadn't heard lyrics so raw maybe ever. Her first album To Whom It May Concern came out as we were going through my in-laws illnesses. In the wake of my father in law's passing, there was a familial implosion and underhanded BS we had to deal with on top of his death. Her lyrics would hit me at times as we suffered through people's lies:
You said it wasn't sharp but I cut my finger
You said it just wouldn't burn and I scarred my face
You said it just wasn't there when it fell down on me
Well I'm just a son of a bitch no matter what you say
To watching manipulation in a relationship I knew would come to a head one day:
Maybe the reason I got needy is because I never had real devotion
Maybe I criticized your loyalty because it wasn't given to me
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And damn it if I didn't try to do everything that I was supposed to
And now what do I do now?
I don't know
Cause I'm still leaving
Now who's gonna save me next time?
Oh, not you for the first time
Somehow I'll be alright
Somehow I'll be alright
Her words reminded me of things I'd written in high school before I had any real idea of the heartbreak and uncertainty finding your true love can bring and all of the obstacles and feelings that can come along with it.
When her next album Now What came out, I could not wait and it didn't disappoint. This album got me through the worst stress of my life between the crap that went down after his dad's death to the most absolute crippling work stress/anxiety I had ever experienced. I would be in the file room or at my desk after an encounter with my manager who used to be my friend but an upgrade in position turned her into a vicious sea hag and I would turn Lisa's song Idiot on full blast.
I'm gonna tell you what I think about you in that unforgivable way I do
You're an idiot
And I hate your guts
I guess I'm about as happy for you as I would be a cockroach in my food
I know it's terrible
I really hate you though
I still have that song along with I'll Figure It Out on my anger management playlists when I want to punch the hell out of someone. That song in particular hit when I was going through yet another adult rejection from my father and it was like my shield against him to get that hurt out of me.
It took me all my life
To finally figure out
That I'm not in the mood
To be anything like you
Maybe it's alright
Maybe not
I'll conduct my choir
I'll figure it out
She also has a hidden track at the end of the last song Now What that is a cover of The Ramones Here Today Gone Tomorrow. I was so happy to find it because when you see there's still like 4 minutes left on the song that just ended, you know you're in for something fun! Even though I hadn't heard the original, the Mr had so he was quite happy for this little Easter egg and I loved it on it's own merit as being hers. Here's a fun but distorted video when Marky Ramone came out at one of her shows supporting that album.
Her third album Storm and Grace went in a completely different direction and that producer made both her and Diana Krall's album sound almost identical. It sounded more like his vision than theirs to my ears but both women raved about working with him. We were lucky enough to see her on a small tour she did in support of that album. I remember being behind the venue listening to her do soundcheck and I could not stop smiling. I was so proud of her! She funded that tour herself for her fans and we were all so grateful. Sadly my camera at the time was HORRIBLE in low light and no pics were allowed so I had to snap a few crappy ones before security started hunting those of us who did sneak them in.
She was so shy and reserved when she came out. She talked to all of us like we were just hanging out. After about two songs, she saw we were all cool and started letting her hair down, laughing and joking and just being a general badass. I so wish we were somehow able to record that show. It was truly such an intimate show and watching her do her involuntary Presley sneer was so adorable. She even mentioned it later in the show how she was NOT trying to imitate her dad but people pointed it out to her when she started and she came to embrace it but she could also tell by the audiences faces when she was doing it a lot. So adorable. I will cherish that night for the rest of my life especially now.
While I didn't initially resonate as much with her final album because of its country undertones, that show helped change my mind. She wrote the song Storm and Grace about her son, Benjamin Storm Keough.
You are the most beautiful man
That I've ever known
Too much to offer
And too much held close to the bone
Just step on the breaks there
You got what it takes
You blow me away, yeah
Your storm and your grace
My heart can't seem to take it
Your storm and your grace
You have the most beautiful heart
That I've ever known
It kills me you can't ever show it
And a shell has been grown
Stop moving so fast there
Take your foot off the gas
You blow me away
Your storm and your grace
My heart can't seem to take it
Your storm and your grace
You blow me away
Your storm and your grace
You can see in her lyrics the intense love she had for him and it feels like she could sense he might not be long for this world? When he died by suicide in 2020, I was scared she wouldn't be long for this world either. I feared it was coming. The fact that she hadn't yet died of a broken heart when she wrote this essay about grief almost 5 months before her own death made me feel like maybe she'd make it. Maybe she'd found some way to channel her excruciating pain which is so honest and raw in that article into something to help others. It seemed that was the direction she was taking in helping others from what some articles have said but it's hard to sift through all of that and know what's true. If so, it's all the more tragic that once she was finally able to move forward in a way that could be of service to others she had that opportunity taken. Anyone who saw her at the Golden Globes saw how unwell and frail she appeared to be. I literally gasped when I saw her since it's the first real time I've seen her recently and I just hoped after the awards circuit that she would get the rest she looked like she needed. Her death ripped through me and I am still in disbelief.
Her memorial was so very much all facets I've seen of her when she was kind enough to share herself. There were gospel interludes which she grew up on with Elvis, songs sung by her friends Billy Corgan, Alanis Morrissette and Axl Rose, and beautiful eulogies including one by one of her teen twins read by Priscilla, a eulogy from long time family friend and manager Jerry Schilling who did an absolutely stunning job of memorializing her and her personality which cracked us up, Sarah Ferguson - that's right, Fergie- who did a lovely job of eulogizing her 'sissy' and I could not stop laughing because of course Lisa was friends with the first black sheep of the royal family. Perhaps the most moving and tragic was read by her son in law that was written by her first born daughter Riley who conveyed what it was like to be loved by her from a small child to two weeks ago on her couch. In that eulogy, it was revealed that Riley gave birth to a daughter whom she hoped she could love the same way she was loved by Lisa. Good on her for being able to pull off the ultimate eff you to the press by being pregnant and giving birth. I pray Lisa was able to meet her and love her but my heart breaks that she will never get to know her grandma personally. I can only imagine the absolutely beautiful hellion she would've been as Grandma Lisa.
I don't know why someone I've never met means so much. I can only assume as someone who has a low BS tolerance, searing comebacks balanced with empathy and vulnerability that I found a strong kinship with her. Someone who if we'd become friends would've been a feared duo to anyone who saw us coming. 😄 I loved her for her...not who her father was. I loved her for her own merit, honesty, talent and truth. The world is a little darker for me knowing she's not in it. The only solace I and I'm sure anyone else who knew, loved or admired her is that she's with her beloved son again and that she and her daddy were finally able to duet in person instead of by technology. The video for one of the duets is sadly a fitting memorial video for her. (You can see others here, here and here) I'd like to think they're sitting at the piano together again; they have a lot to catch up on.
I love and miss you Lisa. Thank you for everything.
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If you want to skip to different parts of the memorial, I've got timestamps below. Even if you weren't a fan, there were some wonderful performances.
Jerry Schilling's Eulogy (*highly* recommend watching this! You will laugh and cry)
Blackwood Brothers Quartet Perform (wonderful full circle story told here- Lisa's grave revealed)
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I do remember seeing her in the MJ video and on the awards show and wondering if she was being taken advantage of. But as I saw more of her personality come through in her music I realized this was a person that was not easily fooled into doing something she wasn't okay with and I saw her as just a tough-as-nails personality. That is why it was so hard to see her struggle so much after her son died but that is the only thing that can break a person like that I suppose. The memorial service was exactly what she would have wanted I think and we will always have her music so I am thankful for that, cause it's really good in it's own right.
ReplyDeleteI think she would've been so happy with the memorial. I know she still had a front row seat
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