Monday, February 3, 2025

Bathroom Shenanigans Weekend Recap

Good February morning to you.  You made it through January (for the long suffering folk) and I can't believe it's already February (for those with endless work or projects that made the month go quick.)  For those of you who read Sunday's post, you know how monthly weigh in went and the ensuing frustration.   Once I calmed down and we both stopped stalling, we knew what had to be done.

Wallpapering. 

This was the project we'd been dreading since the second I mentioned it and made doubly more nerve wracking given for only papering the upper third of the walls, it was $500.  Yeah, we went with the bougie place you've probably seen on your IG feed because it was the only one that made me gasp.  The Mr seemed to like it too but I gasped again when we bought the sample.  The color on the monitor and the whole reason I picked it was because I thought the leaves were a deep emerald green. When we got it, it seemed to be more of a steel blue.  I still liked the pattern but it would be an adjustment from my expectations because I couldn't get the original out of my head even when it was right in front of me.  I need to design wallpaper.  HA!  

We got to it and made our plumb line.



Good Lord that wall looks really textured.   We read this article a few weeks ago about how to keep the paste off of the ceiling (you can't) but it also addressed how to potentially make where the spot comes together look better because the pattern might not match so you want it to be inconspicuous.  We measured off of the plumb line to see where it would end if we went all the way around the room.  Well, it would be a 5" strip (out of 24") right next to the shower.  We thought the chances of it potentially steaming off would be higher by doing that so we agreed we'd have to start from either side then meet in the middle over the door for the least noticeable spot.  

Because we live in a shoe and every square inch of flat space was taken, we had to pull out our Jankified Inc hats as per usual on home reno.  So our wallpaper marking table was a 22" plastic cutting board on the bed.


So us.

Then we would book it, wait and get to hanging when the paste was activated.  (I remember watching videos about wallpaper booking and it terrified us both.  We were sure it was going to glue to itself but thankfully it didn't.)  The Mr tolerated me like a champ because I know if I would've been working with someone like me freaking out over certain stuff, I would've been like "GTFO NOW!!"  But he did need me to line up the seams on the bottom, smooth and hand him stuff so I guess he couldn't kick me out despite probably wanting to.  I wasn't sure we'd get it all done in one day but we did and we're both thankful as hell it was only the top portion because doing the entire wall would be enough to drive you nuts.  We both collapsed when it was done and I fired up the heating pad and massage gun because I was super screwed from walking 6 miles the previous two days in barefoot shoes.  

Sunday we both woke up with headaches so he brought up coffee and yogurt and we watched the tube for a bit.  I had planned a big breakfast so I made that.  We tried the Dolly Parton pancake mix and yep, they're pancakes.  It took a lot in me not to tell the Mr screw it, order breakfast from somewhere which would've been more calories than we were probably allowed for the day so I consider it a win against the 'eff it monster.'  The Mr hung the light in the bathroom after I ordered some vintage LED's for it.  Then we discovered a problem...the medicine cabinet door will hit it.  This thing is literally almost the exact same size and proximity to our old one but nope.  It looks like we'll be able to open it 3/4 of the way and still have access to everything which is all we care about so I'll trudge on as far as making the door as planned.  If it becomes an issue, we'll deal with it but it friggin' figures nothing can just work.

I forgot to put on my watch earlier so I ran up and grabbed that and we went to grab Mom's Christmas wreath off of her "condo."  (I don't like saying grave.)  We went to the park and walked for 6K steps and I made some homemade pizza and salad for dinner while we watched Marc Maron's End Times Fun.  Then we went up and watched Groundhog Day.  I didn't make anything for the coming week but I will a bit today.  

How was your weekend?

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Sunday, February 2, 2025

My Plan for the Week (2/2)


Good Sunday to you.  I'd better still be sleeping when this posts but Saturday night me says good Sunday to you!

Last week was a doozy as we added strength training back in the mix.  I won't lie, in addition to the soreness, it brought up a lot of feelings about how atrophied my muscles are - most of it wasn't in my control.  With all of the vein procedures last year, and having to wait a month in between each one, I couldn't get back into a routine literally from May-December.  Why?  Because my witch ass doctor's office was using the WRONG CODE for every procedure except the last one meaning I didn't HAVE to wait for that long.  Meaning I could've literally been done in 2 months (July) instead of seven and you have no idea how much that pisses me off.  The way I hold weight now is different all of a sudden and I have already been medically declared to have a slow metabolism (thanks BodPod) so losing all of that time to throw my resting metabolic rate even further into the abyss is very soul crushing.  Not to mention it could've helped with keeping some of the weight gain at bay from stress even though my body reacts with massive inflammation when I do add strength back in which I'll have to figure out but still.   I know I can only look forward from now but that's almost a year of my life I lost to doctor's ineptitude. Shocker.  Friggin' shocker.  

Here are the workouts from last week:

Sunday- Floor Bike (60 minutes- 6500 steps)
Monday- Floor Bike/Walk (12K)
Tuesday- Floor Bike/LIIFT 4 Back/Bi's 50/50 (10K)
Wednesday- Floor Bike/ LIIFT 4 Legs 50/50 (10,300K)
Thursday- Floor Bike/Walk (12K)
Friday-  Floor bike/Walk (13K)




Tuesday and Wednesday were when we threw strength back in and we started small.  If we went back in on week 1 Back and Bi's, it would've killed us.  We've been down this road before and doing full circuits will burn us out for DAYS and since we had potential wallpapering on tap for the weekend, that wouldn't have been smart.  The 50/50 days are half weight lifting and half modified HIIT.  I know we both would've been doubly sore had we chosen the other way so even though I could  wash my hair with a few winces Thursday, I still consider it a win.  If we hadn't done 50/50, we would've had to wash each other's hair in the kitchen sink.  Tuesday I was 500 steps away from 10K steps before so I walked them at the end of the bed before conking out.  Wednesday because of strength, my steps were 2500K off after the workout and dinner so I had to hop back on the bike while watching the tube.  I guess this is what dedication looks like or something.  I also had to tell myself that the bike is going to have to be my thing regardless of what "results" it gives me.  I have a tendency that if I don't see a plan or activity that is supposed to be working, isn't working outwardly then I stop; never knowing if I gave it long enough to make a real difference which should be like what, 3 months or something.  Especially at my age.  😒

Water was decent after Sunday.  I still didn't do the watch thing but I guess I didn't need to.

Sun- 64 oz
Mon- 118 oz
Tues- 126 oz
Wed- 125 oz
Thurs- 125 oz
Fri- 123 oz

It's still technically a little under what everything says it should be but I need sleep and I'm already peeing twice after midnight so that's going to have to be good enough.  Given it's twice the amount I used to get on a good day, I'm going to consider it a win.

I began adding more psyllium husk up to 2 teaspoons last week but because of the statins I now have to time everything with ninja-like precision.  Vitamins have to be taken 2 hours before husk to have with breakfast to soak up peanut butter fat then I can't take my refrigerated probiotic until midday.  Then husk with dinner and 2 hours before statin and then I can't take my magnesium within 2 hours.  I need to get off this shit ASAP.  The amount of crap that interacts with this med is ridiculous and do you think my dipshit doctor or the pharmacy lists them?  NOPE.  "Don't eat grapefruit."  Literally the only thing either of them said.  Do you think I can take my morning Ceylon cinnamon with my oatmeal to keep blood sugar stable?  Nope?  Why?  Because it could give me "severe liver damage" according to Dr. Google.  I friggin' give up.  This is supposed to be saving my life right now, right?  Anyhoo.

This past week we caught up on months of unread stuff on our 2024 One Happy Year.  It was so stressful rereading we had to take a break!  One thing that became very apparent was October (when the bathroom stuff originally started) is when we really went batshit with getting takeout more.  Again, not more than some people but more than we're used to and just stress eating the hell out of every brain melting obstacle we came against.  We looked at each other and were like "how did we survive??"  It was quite eye opening.

Then came Saturday's weigh in.  I told you I'd be doing those monthly because mentally I can't handle the stress of "what if" they're shit numbers.  They were shit numbers.

4 lbs lost in a month.  

Don't.  I know the temptation to say that's 4 lbs less.  (But 8 lbs higher than before I left for Vermont.)  Look above.  Look at my water, my steps, my calories were between 1800-2100 and my "remaining calories" after exercise were anywhere between 300-1000 so nope, don't need to cut calories.  Actually, according to TDEE calculators, this should be my calorie range to lose the 2 lbs per week I've been chasing.



I'm not comfortable going up that high for a month only to find out it screws me.  Actually, hang on, let me average last week's calories a sec.  So my average last week including last Saturday was 2174.  100 over what it claims I need.  So in order for that to even out, I'd need to throw in a 1600 calorie day then keep it to 1900 if we want to still have a higher cal but still cooked by me day on Saturdays.  I guess I'll try that for a few weeks and see what happens there.  

But needless to say that I had a meltdown of mass proportions which I feel horrible about because what did the Mr lose last month?  10 LBS!!  (WOOOOOT!!!!)  While I'm so happy for him, what does that do to me?  Reinforces there's something wrong with me on every level.  I know men lose like they're being paid but he actually does less than I do.  He doesn't do the bike and has a desk job.  So there's another mind effer for me.  I start going on about how damn tired I am about tracking every friggin' aspect of my life.  Weigh your body, weigh your food, how many ounces of water, how many steps, how many calories, how many grams of protein, how much saturated fat compared to your total calories and making sure you're between 7-9% so your heart doesn't explode.  And ALLLLLL of the reminders.  Drink your water, roll your legs, take your pysllium husk, take your vitamins, take your statin, put on your watch, drink kombucha because you have zero microbiome apparently, and on and on and on.  Never mind the flippant comments about reducing stress and getting more sleep like it's just so friggin' easy.  Oh and do all of this in excruciating foot pain you have to push through on the daily because the foot pain won't go away until you lose weight which refuses to come off and do it all as you're going through perimenopause.

I. AM. EXHAUSTED.

I can't stop crying.

But I'm not stopping.

So the only thing changing plan wise for this week is making sure my calories average out to the TDEE calculator and adding lymphatic drainage massage in there a minimum of once a day since I guess mine are dead otherwise.

Sorry for the rant but real life only here so, you're welcome.

You got goals for the week?

====================
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Friday, January 31, 2025

What I'm Reading This Week #5

Hello there sassafras!   Happy last day of January.  I know a lot of people complain about January being long but as a winter girl, I'm not ready for 50's and zero possibility of snow.  Tis Friday and the week is hopefully wrapping up for y'all on the work front.  It has been a helluva week body wise as we acclimated back to some strength training and I walked in my Lems for the second time and it really did my gams in.  So I will be doing some lymph work to try to get my body flushing out some inflammation.  It always goes insane when we add strength back in but add that and new walking shoes that are completely not padded and you can guess how that feels!  Here were the workouts for the week:

Sunday- Floor Bike (60 minutes- 6500 steps)
Monday- Floor Bike/Walk (12K)
Tuesday- Floor Bike/LIIFT 4 Back/Bi's 50/50 (10K)
Wednesday- Floor Bike/ LIIFT 4 Legs 50/50 (10,300K)
Thursday- Floor Bike/Walk at Park (12K)
Friday- Floor Bike and whatever my body will allow to get me to 10K

There were two days I had to put in extra at the end of the day because I wasn't going to hit 10K but I got there.  I'll discuss more about that in Sunday's post.

Now let's discuss:



What is Nordic walking? This is how to do it properly, as per experts. (We do this in the winter because Lord knows we usually don't have enough snow to shoe)

20 Best Anti-Inflammatory Dinners  (Damn some of these look good!)







6 Things You Should Never Carry in Your Wallet  (Good tips!  Remember when everyone used to carry around their SS card?  What the hell was that about?! 😂)

How to Turn Off Apple Intelligence on an iPhone, iPad, or Mac  (For those doing the update, AI is automatically turned on)


Just checking, are the Sunday posts being looked at/helping anyone?  It's one thing for me to get it in my head to plan out for us but if it doesn't help anyone else, I can drop 'em.  (I know I said initially it wouldn't be a weekly thing but still checking in.)  I think we're wallpapering this weekend if we get the attic hatch paint touched up.  He poly'd that thing 3x and it still got scratched up.  I will never EVER get $90/gal paint that everyone swears by ever again...you got me Monsieur Williams??  I don't know what else we might get into but we'll see as the day progresses Saturday.  I'll still be cookin' away.  All day.  Every day.  Beh.

Whatchu got planned for the weekend?


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Wednesday, January 29, 2025

Hump Day Poll: Side Goal



In addition to my health goals for the year, I also made a side goal which isn't grand but still something I want to focus on.  Using my lotions.  

Do you know how many lotions I have?  Lots.  Like...LOTS.  

Stuff I've picked up on vacation.  

Stuff hosts have gifted me on vacation.  

Lotions whose scents were being discontinued so I had to stock up.  (No link because...discontinued)

The lotion we bought at the Vermont Country Store when our hands were chapped beyond measure and the smell is so strong I can only use it on my legs.

Pure unscented lotions to cut through the stronger lotions that I love but don't love my nose on their own.  

The lotion that I'm obsessed with and don't use much because I'm afraid it'll run out even though I could buy more but don't.

Not only do I have all of those but in December when we were at the Cabot Annex in Waterbury and we sampled Farm + Sea lotion and I bought the one I liked more and we bought the one the Mr liked.  Then when we put mine on at home, we both couldn't stop smelling ourselves so I went on their website and ordered 2 large tubs because they were 50% off because girl math.  That's right, four new 8 oz bottles of lotions in a month when I have all of those other ones.


source



So there's my soft, dermatologically dirty secret that turned into a side goal.


Any of you have side goals?  (Probably not related to silky smooth hoarding)


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Monday, January 27, 2025

Painfully Productive Weekend Recap

Howzit y'all!  We're back to Monday.  Bleh.  The Mr was a trooper this weekend.  If you read yesterday's post, you saw the bathroom got started and that was thanks to the Mr.  Between my bunged up calves, feet that can't take being on a ladder yet and usual shoulder issues, the bathroom ceiling stuff was dumped in the Mr's lap.  He took it like a champ so I kept the vittles coming.  I had 85/15 beef I needed to use from a while ago so I used that for the burgers that the Mr gave enthusiastic thumbs up to.  The night before, we went to a specialty market downtown and grabbed some pepperoni that our favorite pizza place uses so we could make pizza at home for dinner.



While it wasn't exactly like our favorite spot, it was fine.  I need to figure out how to get the sauce our favorite place uses because I got it years ago but it only comes in like 6 lb vats because the grocery store brand was meh.

The Mr got the attic trim done and a coat of the ceiling paint.  I'm not going to share any pics yet because I want it to be a surprise but I will say that our bold color choice for the ceiling isn't as scary as I thought it could be.  It took a lot out of him because of the overhead work.  I massaged his shoulders because they were bothering him and trying to get in front of any potential headaches for the next day.  Any kind of overhead work including military presses always spells a migraine for him the next day and we thought we evaded that.

Sunday...migraine.  😢

I gave him another massage with some arnica on his shoulders and close to the shoulder blade which is always his problem spot.  Then I hit him with the massage gun until he waved the white flag.  We tried feeding it and it just wasn't getting better.  I suggested the cooling shoulder wrap I got him for Christmas so he put that on his shoulders and conked out for a bit.  I felt horrible for him.  Then he decided he wanted to push through and do the second coat on the ceiling so I started our food prep which was cutting each chicken breast and cooking them one at a time since they were all being used for different things.  How the hell I spent 90 minutes in the kitchen doing that is beyond me.   I now know why I throw it all in the crock pot.  I made the two cauliflower bowls for our lunches this week.  So we are STOCKED.


He put the final coat on while I put his clothes away and we chatted on the bed.  At this point, I had a headache too.  I warmed up the turkey meatloaf I made last weekend, carrots and warmed up the mashed potatoes I threw together earlier in the day.  Before we knew it, it was 6pm and painting was his workout so, I hopped on the floor bike after dinner.  We finished watching Jo Koy: Comin' in Hot that we started the other day and laughed our asses off so hopefully a little extra calorie burn.  We're giving the bathroom this week to start curing before working on the part that scares us both a little next weekend...wallpaper.

How was your weekend?


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Sunday, January 26, 2025

My Plan for the Week (1/26)



Well, howdy do.  Let me take a look at last week's plan and see if I did anything close to success.  Please hold.


Ah yes.  Okay, so I was happy I did the meatloaf and chili last week.  We're likely having the meatloaf today for dinner with some mashed potatoes on a slice of Texas toast bread like The Cheesecake Factory used to before they took it away years ago.  RIP Mile High Meatloaf.  I don't feel the need this weekend to do those kind of make ahead meals, I don't think.  We've got another batch of big ass chicken to get rolling in the crockpot.  I need to cut some up though and do them in the skillet because I'm getting tired of the texture of shredded chicken.  I made the food again Saturday.  I spent way more time in the kitchen than I wanted to because I didn't plan ahead.  The Mr was kind enough to paint the attic trim while I worked over yet another batch of caramelized onions.  This time I did them proper and added 4 boiled dates and 1 serving of real bacon bits for a Bacon Date Jam which is legit the best thing you will ever put on a burger.  I used the remaining 85/15 organic ground beef that's been in my fridge for probably 2 years.  Added some Dinosaur BBQ seasoning to it and attempted to make smash burgers but I can never get them thin enough.  I also made some jalapeno cream cheese spread as the condiment to mimic our favorite, the Pungi Burger from Slabtown in Traverse City.  I had so no salt fries I baked up and judging by the eyes rolling back in the head, sinking in his chair and happy cursing, I believe the Mr approved.  We both agreed we were craving chocolate cake.  Problem is, every single grocery store around here has crappy chocolate cake since everything has gone off site and they are drier than the desert.  We decided to try one of those frozen famous dude cakes since it could be fit into our calories and buy a cheap bit of fudge frosting if I didn't like the milk chocolate frosting.  Well, after thawing, one swipe of the frosting and a wee grab of the cake to taste and it told us it was all pure shite.  Into the trash it went, without hesitation.  I was more upset the Mr's time was wasted getting it, dealing with a woman ahead of him in line with 41 items when it clearly said 12 and $11.50.  The can of frosting went down in the pantry to be forgotten about or until I apparently have to bake our own cake.  So he grabbed us cupcakes from the local bakery and while they're not as chocolately as my time of the month demanded, they lightly scratched the itch.  I will likely make more cauliflower rice bowls for a few lunches this week.

Exercise.  That was on point.  Most days I'd do the floor bike in the morning to go toward those NEAT calories and then formal exercise in the afternoon/evening.



You know what wasn't on point?  Me overstretching my calf muscles doing the 'right' thing for them by doing heel drops off the stairs to elongate the muscle.  I have seriously tight calf muscles I have to work on this year and I literally did that twice in a day on Wednesday and by Thursday I was in serious pain.  Add on that we did what are considered beginner workouts like WATP with 2 lb weights and Grow with Jo which did kicks, knee lifts as well the next day and I was a sore hobbling mess.  Those bodyweight exercises I said I needed to do?  Well, I did 3 sets of stair pushups and the next day I could barely brush my hair.  I won't lie, that was humbling on every level.  I wanted to cry.  So if you think lifting my arms overhead to paint was going to happen, sadly I couldn't do it or stand on the ladder.  The Mr came through like a champ to get the ceiling stuff done in the bathroom.  I'm a lucky girl.

Water was, not surprisingly, my weak point again.  I think I only managed to remember the watch trick 1 1/2 days last week.  

Sun 102 oz
Mon 141 oz
Tues 110 oz 
Wed  74 oz
Thurs  101 oz
Fri  129 oz

Monday was the only day I reached my goal.  I'm hoping to do better this week.  I already hit it yesterday so let's go for today too.

This week will hopefully be my body getting used to us doing more muscle involved workouts like last week even though we didn't realize that's what we were doing.  I'll need to keep doing the heel drops but maybe for not as long at first.  Maybe 30 seconds at a time instead of a full minute.  I did walk one of the days in my Lems barefoot shoes and my shins were quite pissy to me Friday because of it.  I had to get The Stick involved as well as the heating pad.  Again, I'm not sure strength training is a great idea when we need to hang wallpaper overhead so I may need to go with the bodyweight stuff again (but like more than just stair pushups.  Throw in some squats and running lunges so I can both work and stretch too.  Clearly my calves are going to fight me every step of the way but they're going to have to fall in line.

As far as weighing in, I'm doing that once a month right now.  I am way too influenced mentally by the numbers on the scale and all of the things I can be proud of will swirl if it doesn't give me the result I seek.  The Mr has been steadily losing weight up to this point so that's good.  I think this is the longest we've gone without a restaurant high cal day in years.  The ground beef I've used for burgers the past two weeks were ones I had to get rid of because with the cholesterol 85/15 is going to have to be cut back to 90/10 if we want beef burgers.  We also like Beyond Burgers and turkey burgers so it won't always be red meat.   I've still got chili in the freezer so we'll see if we want that next weekend or if something strikes our fancy.  I said I might look on copycat restaurant recipe sites and see if I can get ideas on how to healthy them up.

If you have any thoughts toward your health goals for the week, feel free to share!

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Friday, January 24, 2025

What I'm Reading This Week #4

Well hello there Friday!  (And hello to you too!)   It's been a literal stinky week in these parts with the oil based primer we had to use on the ceiling.  We had issues with the ceiling bubbling in 9 spots where only two year old paint was and we read that was the best solution.  Well, it's also a lung burning solution to someone like me who has sensitivities to strong fumes.  We had an air purifier running day and night but it was no match.  Given it was 7 degrees out at the time, we couldn't exactly throw open the sashes old timey style.  The Mr was kind enough to deal with the ceiling portion and cut in the other type of primer on the walls while I went behind him and rolled on the rest.  Nothing like primer to show you what still needs to be filled and sanded.  So a big thank you to him for doing the ceiling because with my shoulder issues, I really didn't know how I was going to do that and the ceiling.  

As far as my plan, we did really well.  The watch alarm kept me on track with water.  I never really notice any difference when I drink it except peeing.  I have to tell myself it's helping to carry the cholesterol and toxins out of my body because the clear skin, brighter eyes and better pooping everyone swears it helps with is lost on me.  Because of the weather being in the single digits and no snow to shoe in, we didn't have the option to be outside which meant we had to take it to the basement.  

Did I mention this is what the basement looked like??

(Actually, this was cleaned up to make room to workout)


Yeah.  That would be reno, Vermont and displaced object remnants as far as the eye could see.  Oh how I miss 2019 basement that was freshly renovated, clean and we had grand ideas we could go down with a thermos of hot tea and do puzzles on my craft table to get us through the winter.  Never done it.  Sorry 1000 piece puzzle.  At this point, we had to just push everything to the side so we could get in some formal exercise.  Here are our workouts for the week:

Sun- Floor bike (5500 'steps')
Mon- Floor bike/Turbo Fire HIIT 30 (11K steps)
Tues- Floor bike/WATP 3 miles w/ 2&5 lb weights (12,100 steps)
Wed- Floor bike/Grow with Jo (11k steps)
Thurs- Floor bike/ 3 laps at park (11,500 steps)

I'll likely get in a minimum of 10K steps today so I averaged that per day this week!  WOOT.  

Now let's get to:


A movement expert suggests five moves for hip mobility. (I need to work on this for sure.)


Moderate Exercise Isn't Enough to Offset Sitting All Day, Study Says  (I'm really trying to make my 10k a habit between my floor bike while I eat breakfast and lunch and 'formal' exercise)

The Unique Type Of Pasta That Has More Protein Than Eggs (We have it every Wednesday for Italian night!)

New Study: Chronic Stress Could Age This Body Part 33% Faster  (I believe it.  My MIL owes me some Olay)


Chilling Out is a Better Way to Manage Anger − Review of 154 Studies Reveals What Works  (Yeah but there's nothing quite like singing Break Stuff by Limp Bizkit and Let the Bodies Hit the Floor at the top of your lungs soooo...)

People are baffled to find out they've been burning candles wrong their whole lives  (It's true.  Commit the first time or you'll regret it for a long time!)

11 Uses For Bar Keeper’s Friend In Your Home  (We love this stuff and I'm trying it on the stove)

How to say ‘no’ when family and friends ask to borrow money, from a financial therapist  (Look, I know people say "you have to look at it as a gift" and you really do.  You will very likely never see that money again but I can tell you from watching my grandma, people will then consider you an option.  They will use every excuse in the book to manipulate your kindness and then get pissed when/if you try to set boundaries.  Just say no up front.  I know it's hard but I've seen enough to say I've seen too much.)

I think we're going to get the materials we need for the panel portion of the project.  I know we need to get a new toilet too and replace the flooring and all of the things.  We're about to get into the meat of the sandwich so to speak.  Yay.  What a week for Aunt Flo to be driving the bloat/cramp rig into town along with a tweaked lower back and sore muscles everywhere because I didn't realize how effing out of shape I was just doing knee lifts!  😑

Whatchu got cookin' this weekend?


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Wednesday, January 22, 2025

Was It Worth It?




Howdy.  Remember in Monday's post where I let you in on what my therapist and I talked about after the bathroom project manager left?  If not, go back to that post, scroll past the pic of me snow shoeing and refresh yourself.

I honestly wasn't sure if I'd hear back from him.  I know the kind of man he was 5 years ago when we last dealt with him for our kitchen reno but who knows what time and well, the world imploding might've done to him.  He called Monday afternoon.  Usually our phone is on DND so it was a surprise to hear the phone ring.  When I realized who it was (and after jolting the Mr out of a post priming nap), I won't lie for a nanosecond I thought about not picking up but I did.  He said he was really surprised to get my email because he said the project manager said Friday things couldn't have gone better and we seemed happy.  If he didn't offer up a solution, I hardly thought he was authorized to give us any money back.  I was stunned in the moment and didn't know how to say "are you serious mutha effer?!"  We ended up talking for half an hour and I actually pulled up Monday's post where I listed the other things I was holding off mentioning when I felt like I was basically getting a polite justification speech as to why they weren't discounting anything.

He admitted that Covid, the jacking up of prices on all of their materials, trying to price things in a way that won't scare people away and such that they're doing a hail Mary with an ad campaign hoping to dig out of the hole.  This bathroom stuff is new for them and something they're trying to see if they can branch out into.  He went on about how they tried to price slightly lower than their competitors to bring people in (he's not lying, we did our own research) and this whole system is new for all of them.  Matter of fact, he confirmed we were the first ones and I said "I know.  Your guy Todd literally said to the kid he was working with that "I have zero experience with this system which doesn't fill one with confidence after hearing it being forced into place for the third time.""  He said due to their mistake (and probably the fact I called the manufacturer before they could, told them the company screwed up the install, what is realistic to be fixed and what timeline are we looking at) they likely got no discount.  He said they made nothing on ours since they had to do it twice and that's their fault but he wanted me to know if he had the money, he would refund some back.  Look, I totally get that y'all had to eat the cost of reordering the entire system sans the doors because your guy was the one who screwed up but that isn't my problem.  We're now $300 in the hole between the new fan and supplies to fix what they damaged.  

When I told him about the other things that were either not done correctly (the fan) and the other damage we incurred in the ceiling and on the walls, he was like 'well, we can't fix what you don't tell us."  

*bitch switch activated*

I politely but firmly let him know these things were relayed to either the project manager or the lead contractor dude.  Then it seemed like me pointing out that the contractor seemed to look at the damaged ceiling portion like "y'all can't fix that?", he got super defensive of him and said that guy is a perfectionist, gave a long winded example his perfectionism and I said "I absolutely know that about him and I'm not knocking his work.  However, the way a contractor looks at something that is simple to them and being the homeowner who is on the third contractor damaging the same area because their guys weren't careful and yes, it doesn't sit well especially when the guy who did it looked at what he did, went upstairs and never said a word."  He did say that particular helper guy is a bull in a china shop and they've had to talk to him about it.  Well, maybe if he was docked the pay to cover the cost of our materials that we had to buy to fix his carelessness, it might sink in.  He tried to explain to me why the fan housing wasn't replaced and from a contractors perspective if it's the same size then it doesn't make sense to take that out.  I said "yeah but the housing rattled and we paid for it."  

"Oh okay, maybe if that was conveyed they would've made sure they did that?"

"It was conveyed to the project manager, your crew threw away the new housing so we had no choice to but to incur the cost of buying a new fan and have the housing properly installed like we were paying for.  Essentially, we were being charged for a service that wasn't provided because the Mr could've done what they initially did.  We specifically paid for that to be done and even cancelled another contractor we had scheduled who WAS going to go in the attic to do it."

source  (This is also funny because this guy raises bison.)

In the end, it was me giving him tips on how his guys need to have "spacial awareness" because regardless of the size of the house, it's still our stuff getting damaged and we're incurring costs we didn't budget for.  I told him he needs to get some kind of corner protection for the walls for that system.  He offered to have them come out to mud the parts they messed up and I said no, it's been taken care of.  I don't think contractors realize that isn't a solution to someone who just wants you the hell out of the house after going through a bunch of BS.  No, don't send the guys who did the damage out to fix the damage with a chip on their shoulder and make it weird for everyone.  He said he hopes we give them another chance in the future if the need arises and he would make sure he knocked money off of that.  I said nothing else needed done.  He said that he sees the buffalo art I had made for him after the kitchen remodel every day along with my thank you note and this just hurt his heart.  I told him his crew are the nicest crew we've worked with but the lack of care used is a big problem.

So...I did it.

Was it worth it?  I don't know, I guess so.  Part of me feels like a failure for not getting what I wanted out of it so then why bother?  Then the other part of me thinks I let him know that no things didn't go well on some fronts and you should be prepared to compensate for that or people will have a bad taste in their mouth.  He sounded truly sorry and flustered by the whole thing and wasn't at all condescending like many contractors we've worked with have been.  The people pleaser part of me feels bad and I tell myself..."NO, stop that!  You have a right to be upset.  The point was to be heard regardless of the outcome."  I know my brain and it'll likely stew for a bit which I would like to work on in the coming year.  

Okay...byeeee!

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Monday, January 20, 2025

What a Week Weekend Recap




Happy Monday, my friends!  Did you have a good weekend?  I hope it went nice and slow and not the kind you blink and it's 7pm on Sunday and you feel disoriented.  We had quite the week last week with the bathroom reno restarting.  I will say it takes a lot out of you to have people come in like a wrecking ball on Monday only to finish the day looking exactly the same but now with the smelly addition of toxic adhesive fumes.  They ripped out what they did wrong and put the new one back in.  Actually no, it didn't look the same.  There were a ton of gaps that weren't there before on the top and in the corners.  Why?  Because they couldn't be trusted to line up the templates as cut by the measurements the project manager took.  The solution?  Thick ass trim.  3" thick trim because they couldn't do it right otherwise and they had to eat the cost of the reordering the entire system again and that's how much trust they had in their work crew.  You know what else worried me?  The fact that even WITH this gap in the corner, the outer walls where they lined up before were almost 1" shorter from the drawn line on the wall of where it lined up before.  I checked the base and that lined up the same as the new walls and I was perplexed.  Did they piece together what they had available??  Why is nothing lining up?  What can be done about this?  Nothing.  If we're getting shorted an inch somehow, we have to just deal with it.  I swear it felt smaller just looking at it.  At this point, I will be happy to have something even slightly wider than my body given I've been getting mauled by the shower liner with every shower.   

Monday was re-installing what they screwed up.  

Tuesday was the main dude having an appointment so he didn't arrive until 11am and that day was an inordinately long amount of time cutting trim.  I mean they left at 4:15pm, there were two guys, essentially FIVE pieces of trim to cut and that's what was done in a half day when the day before he told us he was going to do that plus install the shower doors so we could have a working shower by Wednesday because it needs 24 hours to cure.  So that wasn't going to happen.  Looks like wipe showers and dry shampoo for us.  

Wednesday rolled in and they installed the new bathroom fan.  (At this point, I purposely bought one they would be forced to take the old housing out because it's smaller but the other one was a piece of crap that the company wouldn't stand behind when I showed them direct pics of defects.)  That and skim coating took about 4 1/2 hours before a lunch break and getting back to it.  Whatever that was because the Mr and I were messaging each other the whole time and it went a little something like this, hit it:



As you can see...underlying stress all day long as we overheard conversation when we would mute the TV if something perked our attention.  I mean if we had two of the one dude there, it would've gone faster but it was a lot of telling the other dude how to do his job because he was 'teaching'.  How about since this is a job where the last time your 'teacher' told his student "I have no experience with the system" just because trying to force in three different walls multiple times and you had to eat the cost of ordering a whole new system, maybe you could send a fully experienced crew?  13 minutes after that exchange, we hear a sound that sounds like them cracking into the frosted glass door.  We look at each other since he's off by now and we know we're going to have to do an even closer inspection than we were going to do anyway.  A lot of looking skyward.  Then the 'student' comes down to get the plumbing fixtures we had them take out with a gently worded note to be careful when they removed them as they were new.  (We never knew who we were getting day to day so sadly we had to leave notes like we were leaving them for 10 year olds because the dude who was forcing in the walls last time?  Older than us.)  

By 4pm, like every day for them, as if the whistle blew in the sheep field...

source

they were packing up.  

The Mr went up to inspect and I went up as well to change into shoeing clothes.  He pointed out where if you fling the door open, the glass is going to crash into the handle on the left we said we didn't want.  (It opens to the toilet so no need for it from the inside.)  I called the manufacturer and asked if they had bumpers for the track or anything and he said they didn't.  He pulled up my order and said 
"oh.  These are the guys that had to reinstall because they scratched the cap and base up."  
"Yep."  
"I remember that."  
"Me too"

I also asked about another concerning issue when I was looking at their website about how to avoid any potential damage issues.  You're supposed to 'let it breathe' or on white colors, like our walls, there can be yellowing.  I asked when our unit shipped and he said the 10th of December.  I said "so it's been sitting there covered in plastic for a month, is that bad?"  He said "its not great, ideally they should've pulled that off but if there's ANY issue with that, call us, we'll fix it."  So I'm praying there IS no future issue awaiting us but yeah.  He's sending the new handle out and we should have it this week so we can replace that ourselves.  He's like "lets not get them involved with this, I'll send this straight to you."  😂   We went snow shoeing after and it was bitterly cold on the fingertips but on our third lap we got to see deer when it was dark and we were under stars.  (Well, I saw their shape but still.)  It was a nice reward for hanging in there all day.




Friday was the day the project manager came to inspect what they did and get the final payment.  I purposely didn't write the check because I wanted to see if they were going to do the right thing and give us money off for the BS.  He looked at it and said because of our job, they now require trim because otherwise it's just too tight.  We recalled how Todd forced the panels in multiple times, mentioned about the dings in all the walls, you know, reminding him of the trouble.  All of the more harshly worded things we swore we were going to say the previous day went out the window.  Then he gave the amount to be paid.  Full price.  I was stunned for a second and my blood was boiling so bad I messed up the first check as everyone stood in silence.  At that point it was just like GTFO of our house.

Luckily, about two hours later, I had therapy.  I griped to her about it pretty much the whole time.  I told her I was so tired of this crap of getting the shaft from every contractor, 5 star rated with much research by the way, every effing time.  She asked why I didn't ask for money off.  I said I felt like we dropped enough reminders that he should've offered it.  I think I was waiting for the Mr to say something (not in his nature) and he was waiting for me to be the heavy, then neither of us did it.  She said it wasn't too late just because we paid and I could contact them.  She could tell I was likely not going to do that.  She said I continue to allow bad behavior of people not delivering or taking responsibility when they f*ck up and don't have the confidence to hold people accountable because I don't feel worthy.  I agreed and she said you can do that without it being personal.  The standard now is shit expectations and by not holding people accountable, it allows them to walk all over you.  I told her I would consider it and she said "I can lead you to water Anele..."  I said "I know!"  When it was over, I talked to the Mr about it and he was hem hawing around and said it was up to me.  I asked why he would be against it and he said because then it makes us look poor like we can't afford it.  Well, when he told his own co-workers at the beginning of the week when he said the project was starting back up, they were like "at a discount, right??" and he said he didn't know.  So even his own co-workers thought we deserved money off after all of the bullshit but he wasn't going to be the one to ask.  So you know what?  I did.  I emailed the owner whom we dealt with on our kitchen project.  I told him I understood there was likely cost on their end since they had to reorder the system again but given the inconvenience along with the door repair I was going to have to do upstairs when they scratched our doors which was an added inconvenience and cost we were not prepared for.  I said I purposely didn't make out the check to see if the project manager was going to give any money off and when he didn't, it was upsetting and maybe he didn't have that authorization.  I was contacting him to give him the opportunity to correct that.  I have no idea if I'll hear back from him or not.  I've kept a couple of other things that went wrong in my back pocket like ceiling chunks that were just finished 2 years ago as well as their team shortcutting the fan replacement we paid for and throwing away a part of the new fan so we had to incur extra expense for that.  We'll likely never see them again anyway.  Even if we put another bathroom in the basement, it would be a different type of job they wouldn't do.  We'll see how that pans out.

The actual weekend was pinching ourselves their part was actually done and we don't have pending appointments with them anymore.  I needed a day to mentally recoup from the previous anxiety of the previous two weeks and prepare but the Mr was jacked to get some forward progress made, which I get, but just made me grumpy.  He asked earlier in the week what fun thing I wanted to do this weekend and I didn't know then but later saw an antique store I liked was having a sale so I scheduled a reminder email Friday so we could get to it Saturday.  That's where my headspace was.  I'm a processer especially after writing an uncharacteristic email asking if you're sure you wanna charge full price after that BS in addition to what needs done, need a day to breathe from a week of gut gnawing stress and he wants to plow forward to get the reminders of them out of here as a way to deal with his anxiety.  Not getting the day I needed started me on a spiral so I guess I have a new topic for therapy tomorrow!  We wallpapered the attic hatch drywall piece, he spackled holes they made pretty much everywhere.  Of course we didn't have the same ceiling paint so we had to buy a whole new friggin' gallon just for touch ups which pissed me off more.  I should send them a bill for all of the things we had to buy due to their guys screwing up or not being careful.  So he got that delivered and repainted the ceiling spots  I worked on some meal prep earlier in the day which you may have read about in a rare Sunday post.  I hate how much food prep takes out of me and to pile that on regular having to cook makes me really pissy.  I even pre-formed and seasoned our burgers the night before thinking I was ahead of the game but forgot to make the caramelized onions I had planned and those take for-EV-errrrr.  So that first glorious shower in our completed shower that had me so clean?  I now smelled like an onion farm for the rest of the day.  I got some work done here and there and I know all of the tax crap is looming for me to get together so I was feeling the pressure.

Sunday morning was spent with me bed rotting with my earplugs in as long as possible.  Nothing like starting the day with some good old fashioned avoidance.  Plus, you know how it is when things ended on a pissy note the night before and the next day you're mentally like "are we still doing this because my frame of mind is only worse because of have to do's after not getting to do my want to do's."  I come out and the Mr is painting and gives me a good morning.  

Have to do's.  Beh.

I guess time to get the crockpots going and cut veggies for chili since I don't like the way the chili tastes when I use the food processor.  Then I have to cook some more for actual meals that day and I can already feel the mental pressure.  Hmm, since he's already on a painting frenzy, I thought I'd see how he felt about priming while I'm food prepping because the thought of doing both makes me not want to do either.  He then asked about going to the antique store and I told him that was kind of a yesterday thing because I said I needed a day and he said he wanted to get the other stuff taken care of.  I don't think people who don't suffer with the kind of anxiety or whatever I have, where I don't want to be reminded yet/just give me a minute get how stressful that is to watch other people do the stuff you're not mentally ready for yet.  Major guilt comes into play and overwhelm which turns to a swirl of other emotions.  Between getting home from a road trip, a week of anticipatory anxiety for both of us with the unknown and a week of the known, now my headspace with all of the crap we had ahead of us that is now hanging over me, I had a breakdown and started crying.  I asked if he could prime and he seemed okay with it so I told him I'd make brunch first since he woke up with a headache.  Time to stop doing the coming week food prep, switch to all of the brunch food prep which is always a fun balancing act hoping everything is still hot when you get it served and it never seems to be.  😕

After that, he got working on the priming and I turned on this super cute speaker my friend got me for Christmas and put on some boogie tunes to make kitchen time suck less.  I went back to veggie cutting, doing the mountain of dishes awaiting me, switched out the trash and cleaned it inside and out, cut up some of the bag of jalapeno peppers I got to encourage me to actually use them instead of letting the rest of the bag rot.  Peeled our black garlic for the week and did a quick wipe down.  My back was really starting to hurt but I still needed to paint the attic hatch so I sat down and did that then washed the brush so I'd be ready later that night for coat two.  

When we finally hit a stopping point, then we made it to the antique store.  I spied the books I liked as a kid.


There wasn't anything that caught my fancy but it was nice to get out of the house.  We came home and he fixed some ceiling paint issues and I put the second coat on the attic hatch wallpaper.  Primer revealed there were some holes to fill and some areas to sand so the Mr took care of that.  We had some of the chili I'd been cooking all day then I began parsing out the crockpot chicken.  I did two cauliflower rice bowls for us this week...Chinese and Mexican.  Then I got the others in dishes to be used another night.  I got the chili in the freezer and cleaned up a little and I was a pooped pup.

We watched a little tube and that was about all she wrote for the night.  We cozied in with a little hot cocoa before the temps take a nosedive.  So that about wraps up our end so far.  If you want to see what my plan for the week is health wise, head over to yesterday's post.

How was your weekend?


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Sunday, January 19, 2025

My Plan for the Week (1/19)



I doubt I'll do this every week but I thought I'd write this out for my own sanity and thought if anyone else needed a reason to think about their week, maybe this would help.

Saturday I made our food again instead of eating out.  Again, there were sweet treats but they were kept under control even though I reeeeeally wanted just one more thing as the night wound down.  Calories were 3000 that day.  If that sounds appalling, we could do anywhere from 1000-1500 more than that depending on what we got to eat for lunch or dinner from a restaurant.  (If you ever track eating out two meals over the weekend, you may be shocked at what you consume.  I enter calories as close as I can based on what restaurants are in the tracker.)  In addition to that, I burned 1000 calories on the floor bike broken up into two sections.  (1050 but I always subtract 50 calories for lack of accuracy)  I didn't drink quite as much pure water as I wanted but 32 ounces and four cups of tea and a decaf coffee with almond milk for over 8 glasses of liquid that day.  As I was making the caramelized onions for our burgers, I also threw together turkey mushroom meatloaf so I could have that ready to roll this and next week.  I like it on nights when I'm craving comfort food because it's only 200 calories for a good sized slice.  

Today I've got the crock pots working overtime as I have turkey chili brewing in one and a 3 lb pack of chicken breasts going in the other.    I'll have the chili ready for a dinner and likely use the other for a weekend meal as we really love chili cheese fries.  Obviously, the cheese will have to be kept to one serving or if I am feeling particularly healthy, with nutritional yeast.  You can find fries at Whole Foods with no salt added and bake 'em up in the oven.  Or if we're waxing nostalgic for Hawaii, I'll cook up some brown rice for a chili rice bowl.   (For comparison's sake, chili cheese fries depending on the restaurant can run from 650-1350 calories and sat fat 25-50g or my version 500 cals and 5g sat fat.)  The chicken breasts, which run about 8-9 oz per breast, will be frozen and pulled out as needed for stuff like stir fries with cauliflower rice, enchiladas with red pepper hummus and taco sauce and/or BBQ lavash pizza.  The goal is to make prep during the week as easy as possible on myself.  If I have it in me, I'll throw together a few cauliflower rice bowls for lunch this week but that might be pushing it.  We also got low sodium cottage cheese which helped me hit my protein goals last week.

On the exercise front, we've got a bit of a deep freeze right now but the temps will warm up to the 30's eventually.  Sadly no snow left to shoe in so we'll have to decide if we want to walk the park before the kids get out of school or around 5pm when they should be crawling home.  If not, then time to throw something more formal back in the mix in the basement.  I wanted to start strength training this week but I'm wondering if that's a good idea because I have some overhead priming/painting on tap and if I have bad DOMS then I might not be able to do it.  We'll see how the week goes; maybe I can fit it in somewhere in the there like bodyweight exercises.  Stair push ups, lunges, squats and stuff like that to get the muscles ready to get back in action.

I need to get water on point.  I know that's my weak spot so I think since emails are too easy for me to snooze, I'm going to need to set my watch alarm for every 30 minutes.  I also need to balance getting in too much so that I'm not up weeing all night long and screwing up any chance at sleep...yet another thing I must tackle but not this week in addition to everything else.

Sorry if this is riddled with typos.  My proofreader is watching the last episode of Silo so I'm leaving him alone.  

Anything you want to do to help yourself in the coming week?


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