Tuesday, December 20, 2016
Thoughts on Gifts
There are usually four camps people fall into as the buyer.
"I know you so well, I'm going to pick out what I think you like because I'm just that good!"
"You'll get my present and like it and if you don't, I don't care. I will say let me know if you need the receipt but will use it against you in gossip and will totally complain if you don't have the item out when I visit."
"I listen carefully to clues of things you said you wanted during the year and pick up things I know you won't buy yourself."
"Give me your specific wishlist or Amazon link so I don't waste my money."
I fall into the last two camps because I have been the victim of the first two camps particularly my first 10 years of knowing the Mr. There is nothing I hate more than seeing people waste their money. One year I got a horrible toucan plaster pin and the back of it had a blood stain on it. Yeah. What about me screams "toucan!" and you obviously didn't flip it over when you bought it at the yard sale to see there was a reason it was out there. I believe that was the same year I got earrings with ear crud still on them and it was from the same person. I smiled, sent a thank you note and they promptly went into the trash. That's just gross. Since then, the person has wised up and just gives us money to buy what we want. May seem impersonal to some but I tend to hoard it and then before I know it, I've got a lot to go toward something big. Or maybe treat myself to a few massages to keep out of jail. (The Mr wants me to make sure you know it is NOT him!)
We have wishlists on Amazon and my mom, best friend and Grandpa's wife shop off of them. We add to it all year long and then 1 month prior to birthdays, we go through it and make sure we still want what's on there, delete as necessary and then release it to the family masses. Again, may seem impersonal but it ensures we get what we want/like and not gifts we already have or have no need for. I can't count how many times I've gotten "extra" gifts that weren't on the wishlist and I smile and when they leave it's like "um...what do I do with this?" Then I get into a situation where I feel guilty for not using it and hold on to it like it will magically become something I need one day. Please don't think me ungrateful, I'm not! But when someone spends an extra $20 on something I know with certainty I will never use, I die a little inside for the money they wasted. When you live in a shoe box, you don't have the actual room to fall into that trap. So I usually have a box handy after the holidays and anything I get that I didn't ask for that I don't anticipate needing goes into it and straight to Goodwill. I feel awful about it but I say a little prayer asking for forgiveness and then move on.
I always ask people what they want and thankfully they all are very specific with me because they know that's how I operate. They know "if I tell her I want X, I'll get it" and if I don't get it, I'll pass it along to someone else who could use the idea. I actually really appreciate people giving me ideas and specifics because it makes it easier on me and I know they'll like what they get.
What camp do you fall into as a buyer? As a receiver, do you like when people ask you what you want or guess what they think you'll like?
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