Thursday, September 4, 2014

Monthly Dialogue




Debra Barone:   Have you ever considered giving me a hug?

Ray Barone:   A hug?

Debra Barone:   Yes!  A hug!   Did you ever think of that, you big jerk?

Ray Barone:   Well, it's pretty hard to hug someone who's trying to kill you!

Debra Barone:   How would you know?   You've never even tried it!

Ray Barone:   Well, look... *this* is not huggable!  *This* is not Debra!  This is the woman who shows up once a month to tear into me like a monkey on a cupcake!

The above is one of my favorite episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond called "Bad Moon Rising" in which Ray blames Debra's foul mood on PMS and his mother refers to them as her "ladies days."
As I type, I am in the throes of womanhood.  (Sorry dudes... you might want to run on this one.)   I was commiserating with a friend of mine during our last visit about 'that time o' the month.'  (We're chicks, isn't that what guys think we do anyway?  Why disappoint?)

I'm on the pill so I can basically predict with lightning accuracy as to when it should show up.  If my ladies days were a sitcom, the exchange might go like this:

Aunt Flo:  "Hi there!  It's Tuesday so I'm going to start kicking you in the lower back if you don't mind."

Me:  "Give me your best shot lady. No, no... I was kidding. Please don't."

Then comes Wednesday.

Aunt Flo:  "Me again. You know what I thought would be fun?  I'm going to swing from your Fallopian tubes like a monkey at a zoo. Weeeeeee!"

Me:  "Not funny. Don't take this wrong but, I strongly dislike you."

Thursday rolls around.

Aunt Flo:  Release the kracken.

Me:  *starts counting down the years until menopause*

My friend isn't on the pill and she knows at some point in a week's time she will be blessed with the same general issues but sometimes she doesn't want to leave the house she's in so much pain. I guess I'm a wimp, I like that the pill, for me, keeps the kind of pain she was describing somewhat manageable. We were comparing our idea of comfort, besides keeping Stayfree® pads in stock.  

Tea
I've gotta have my green tea or some kind of hot tea.  I don't know what it is about some kind of warm beverage at that point is so soothing. 

Ibuprofen
Ibuprofen must be within arm's reach whether I'm at home or in the car.  I don't like to take anything if I don't have to but when I'm losing the cramp war, anti-inflammatories are right up there in my arsenal. 

Exercise or some kind of activity. 
I know, this sounds like the last thing you'd want to do but for me being somewhat active to keep my mind off of it helps. I'm not talking "hey let's go for a squat and burpee record!" but a good walk around the park or even a decent aerobics session will do the trick.

Movies
If I know we're going to be home on the weekend then it's time to dig into the queue to watch mindless movies I'm on the fence about or grab my favorite comedies to keep me laughing.

Doting
This is where the Mr will win big points if he retrieves my tea, gives me a lower back massage or even just giving that look of empathy/horror when I hiss "YOU should have to go through this every month!"  Tip to any brave men who stuck around this far, your lady will love you even more if you pick up some of these tips. Oh and for those in new relationships, never assume her bad mood or what you perceive as an irrational argument is due to a woman's time of the month. If you want to keep all of your body parts intact, never utter the words "are you PMSing?"

Depending on how bad it is for my friend, she either grins, bears it and goes with whatever plans she and her Mr made or she stays curled up in a ball, eating chocolate and trying not to hiss.

Hey, I say do what works.

What do you do to get comfort during your "ladies days?"

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Leave a comment below letting me how you pamper yourself for a chance to win a $100 Drugstore.com gift card!

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83 comments:

  1. Luckily I don't have to worry about this anymore, but back in the day the heating pad was my best friend. It helped the back pain as well as the cramping.

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  2. Midol. Extra Strength Multi Symptom Midol. I get Joe Peschi before a snickers bar mean without it. Plus it cuts down the pain and bloating.

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  3. Ibuprofen and chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate. Occasionally ice cream, too.

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  4. Thankfully I never had it too bad so ibuprofen usually did the trick and my hubs would know to be extra kind to me and he obliged. Now I'm in old lady phase and leaving this all behind soon.

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  5. When I was a teen, my mom would buy cheap Manischewitz wine and give me a few tiny sips to take the edge off (yay, mom!) As an adult, I require a heating pad, ibuprofen, hot jasmine green tea, a comfy blanket, and one of my puppies to cuddle (puppy can also double as a heating pad in a pinch, lol!) I've also found that gentle movement (like a walk or treading water in my pool) helps. And I agree: my hubby definitely scores brownie points when he is extra-nice to me during my period!

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  6. Only naproxen works for my cramps, so I take that. Also, watching my favorite movies while lying on the couch is great.

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  7. Pamper myself with a hot bath and good book

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  8. I ask my husband for a massage.

    mami2jcn at gmail dot com

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  9. tweet:

    https://twitter.com/mami2jcn/status/507646827898736640

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  10. I like to pamper myself during my ladies days by taking a relaxing time to enjoy our hot tub. It really soothes me.

    Nicole.ddziedzic at gmail dot com

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  11. My tweet: https://twitter.com/lil_lady_dz/status/507682219054231552

    Nicole.ddziedzic at gmail dot com

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  12. I like eating chocolate and just laying down

    dlatany at gmail dot com

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  13. https://twitter.com/sweetums82/status/507699643279368192

    dlatany at gmail dot com

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  14. I like to pamper myself by taking hot bath

    elena150980@yahoo.com

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  15. I pamper myself by eating chocolate and wearing my favorite pajamas.

    kellywcu8888ATgmailDOTcom

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  16. tweet
    https://twitter.com/kellysaver/status/507700862417137664

    kellywcu8888ATgmailDOTcom

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  17. https://twitter.com/ElenaIstomina/status/507700999276855296

    elena150980@yahoo.com

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  18. I pamper myself by lighting candles and taking a bubble bath!

    Thanks for the chance to win!

    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  19. tweet--https://twitter.com/WildOrchid985/status/507719264229687297

    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

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  20. i pamper myself by taking a long hot bath at least once a week

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  21. https://twitter.com/LuLu_Brown24/status/507919088895549443

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  22. I pamper myself by getting a full body massage.

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  23. I like to sit down with a good book and a mug of tea.

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  24. Tweet
    https://twitter.com/clc408/status/507949749182660608

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  25. i like to take a long hot bath with a face mask, lots of bubbles and a good book!!!

    vanitizebaby at yahoo dot com

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  26. tweet

    https://twitter.com/MeandBells/status/507956717930704897

    vanitizebaby at yahoo dot com

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  27. I pamper myself by taking a nice bubble bath while listening to music and reading a good book.

    s2s2 at Comcast dot net

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  28. https://twitter.com/susan1215/status/508053241276272641

    s2s2 at Comcast dot net

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  29. I try to pamper myself by going for long walks or runs and by taking lots of hot showers. Listening to music is also pampering.

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  30. I tweeted about the giveaway with twitter id @yarbr012 : https://twitter.com/yarbr012/status/508405975016296448 yarbr012 at gmail dot com

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  31. Taking and epsom salts bath for about 10-15 minutes and ibuprofen.

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  32. Considering how jacked up my periods have been (have had it two solid months...no joke), I've taken great care in trying to be good to myself so I don't go insane. One of my favorite things to do is to light a candle that reminds me of fall (I like Wood Wicks because it sounds like a crackling fire), grab some hot chocolate loaded with my gingerbread marshmallows (yep, even in summer) and sit on the end of the couch that reclines and wrap myself up with a beautiful soft yellow afghan my mom's friend, Judy, made for me and read a romantic suspense from start to finish. No tv, no music, just the sound of that crackling candle and me getting lost in the story. Makes me feel good each and every time.

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  33. I pamper myself by taking a nice, hot bath with a good book.

    prettyinhotpink6 at gmail dot com

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  34. https://twitter.com/PrettyHotPink6/status/509064152329879552

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  35. I pamper myself by splurging on my favorite Starbucks drink once in a while.
    tcarolinep at gmail dot com

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  36. -https://twitter.com/tcarolinep/status/509529819538010113

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  37. hot baths, pedicure, coffee and donuts pryfamily5@gmail.com

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  38. I tweeted: https://twitter.com/thepryfamily5/status/510240598977036288 pryfamily5@gmail.com

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  39. i take a long hot bath
    tina19820115@gmail.com

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  40. https://twitter.com/HappyTina0115/status/510973721318670336
    tina19820115@gmail.com

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  41. I pamper myself by taking 15 minutes to myself to drink a cup of tea, eat some chocolate and catch up online.
    mummytotwoboys@yahoo.com

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  42. Tweeted for a second entry
    https://twitter.com/mummytotwoboys1/status/511333053289869312
    mummytotwoboys@yahoo.com

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  43. Tweet: https://twitter.com/OneFrugalGirl/status/511626232740737025

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  44. I like to watch romantic comedies or anything funny really.

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  45. I enjoy pampering myself with a box of chocolate, some music, and a glass of wine!
    stoopidgerlart (at) gmail (dotcom)

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  46. The rare moments I get a chance to sit down with a cup of tea and enjoy some silence is great pampering!

    chambanachik(at)gmail(dot)com

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  47. I take a warm bath.
    MCantu1019 at aol dot com

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  48. My favorite is to get a foot rub.

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  49. tweeted
    https://twitter.com/rubylorikeet/status/513124989545902081

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  50. I pamper myself with fancy chocolates and a cup of coffee.

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  51. I JUST KICK BACK AND RELAX (AND POP A COUPLE MIDOL USUALLY TOO, LOL) afjackly@oakland.edu

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  52. https://twitter.com/kytah00/status/514601122242510848 afjackly@oakland.edu

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  53. I pamper myself by taking care of my nails - I am usually taking on the phone or watching TV at the time, and I take off any polish that is on them, and then I groom my cuticles, file and shape my nails, and then if I want to put on a new color I do that (base coat, 2 coats of color, top coat, and drying drops). It's a necessary task, but also relaxing. :-)

    Thanks so much for having this giveaway! :-)

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  54. I tweeted here (yay for an extra entry!) :-) -
    https://twitter.com/missbonniebelle/status/514621385038397440

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  55. i love to go to get nail done for a treat

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  56. https://twitter.com/purplelover04/status/514891887086686208

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  57. A warm shower always helps with aunt flow.....but a bath is my favorite way to pamper myself.
    nuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net

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  58. tweeted: https://twitter.com/KerryBishop/status/515841782286782464
    nuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net

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  59. I pamper myself by taking a long bubble bath with a good book!

    Thanks for the chance to win!
    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  60. tweet--https://twitter.com/WildOrchid985/status/516290735914876928

    wildorchid985 at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  61. I'm past the age of periods and in all honesty after my first child was born things got 1000% better. But I still like to pamper myself with long hot baths, preferably late at night when no one will bother me.

    willitara [at] gmail [dot] com

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  62. Tweet - https://twitter.com/willitara/status/516381329903325184

    willitara [at] gmail [dot] com

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  63. By taking a bubble bath

    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

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  64. tweet https://twitter.com/ChelleB36/status/516593607935946753

    tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com

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  65. I pamper myself by getting my hair colored each month.
    sonyadmorris@gmail.com

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  66. Link to tweet:
    https://twitter.com/catholicfanatic/status/516462320344506369
    sonyadmorris@gmail.com
    Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  67. My daughter and I set up a "spa" in the bathroom and do each other's nails! It's great!
    Shiebs24 at gmail dot com

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  68. I pamper myself with relaxing music, a bubble bath and a glass of wine.

    ReplyDelete
  69. tweet: https://twitter.com/myfolly/status/516834586673041408

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  70. i get manicures when I can
    POKERGRL8 at gmail.com

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  71. https://twitter.com/aes529/status/516982336945418241
    POKERGRL8 at gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  72. I pamper myself with new nail polish and a pedicure.

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  73. I Tweeted: https://twitter.com/lisalmg/status/516986078964625408

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  74. i pamper myself by relaxing with a good book!

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyDelete
  75. I pamper myself by drinking a hot mug of cocoa with whipped cream! mmm so relaxing and delicious!
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  76. I tweeted here: https://twitter.com/MsTofuFairy/status/517051414041088000
    Angie
    14earth at gmail dot com

    ReplyDelete
  77. I like to go out to a nice dinner to pamper myself.

    rounder9834 @yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  78. https://twitter.com/thomasmurphy40/status/517053801334050816

    rounder9834 @yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  79. A nice manicure and pedicure
    tweety800265(at)yahoo(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  80. https://twitter.com/disneyfan40/status/517084596845178880
    tweety800265(at)yahoo(dot)com

    ReplyDelete
  81. i posted a tweet here:

    https://twitter.com/bellows22/status/517088526626992128

    debbiebellows (at) gmail (dot) com

    ReplyDelete

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