Thursday, October 24, 2013

Guest post from The Mr: Talking to my old self


Oh you're in for a treat today, y'all. You get a break from my sorry ass and get to listen to the Mr spout off!  Buckle up buttercups!

First of all I'd like to thank the Mrs for asking me to share a post with everyone today.  This all stems from something that happened to me this week and we both felt it was something that perhaps everyone could appreciate.  I suppose I should introduce myself a little first.  I am married to your trusted blog-mistress, and have been through this weight loss journey along with her.  At my heaviest I weighed 455 lbs and am around (not counting any recently acquired vacation weight) 265 lbs.

During my weight loss journey, I had a lot of co-workers who would all notice the differences in my weight at various times.  It's funny how some people can be oblivious for much longer than others but that is how it is. Eventually, however, the weight loss became so noticeable that virtually everyone in my immediate work area noticed and for a long time I was getting compliments all the time.  That is a little hard to get used to at first but eventually I saw it as a gift.  Now that I am in the tougher third leg of my journey and not losing as much weight but maintaining what I have lost and I rarely have anyone say much of anything anymore.  Until yesterday, that is.

I was walking through the hall at work yesterday and had a guy who I've seen before but don't actually work directly with.  He works on a totally different floor and our paths rarely cross but he does come down for the occasional meeting.  He was heading in the same direction as me and I noticed he was kind of walking next to me and then he said, "pardon my asking but how much weight have you lost?"  I told him and his next question was "forgive me for being rude and asking but I have got to know, did you have weight loss surgery?"  I proudly said no and the look on his face was a mix of disbelief and, dare I say, relief.  I should mention that this man is probably close to 400 lbs and it was as if his eyes lit up when I said that.  He then said that was encouraging to him because another co-worker of ours died about 3 years ago from complications of weight loss surgery.  I knew the guy but had not known that he died of that, so this was news to me.

He suddenly had a ton of questions for me.  "What do you eat"? being the biggest one.  I found a lot of my old self in him.  It was like the old me at 455 lbs asking the new me how I did it and all of those questions I always wanted to ask someone who I'd seen who lost weight.  When I told him that I had slowed down in my weight loss lately he said "yeah but you keep losing weight."  He said, "I saw you lose weight initially and then over the past couple of years I'd come down here and see you and be like, wow that guy lost even more weight".  Then he said "when other people lose weight around here they tend to follow a trend where they eventually start to creep back up again but with you, every time I see you you're still losing weight so I finally had to ask you how you do it".

So all this time I never even realized that there was this person who noticed my weight loss from afar but maybe either didn't want to say anything or just wasn't ready to yet.  I understand that completely because I have been there.  It's funny because there is this part of me that wants to help everyone I see but then I'm reminded that you cannot just walk up to any big person and be like "I know how to help you" because I know what I would have done if that had happened back in the day.

But as much as I feel like I have helped someone else, I also realize just how much he helped me today too. Just by getting a reminder of where I've been and how far I've come is a big boost to the ego but also my motivation on this journey.  Just the shot in the arm I needed.  So I guess the moral of the story is that you should most certainly approach another person you've admired from afar.  You just might be helping them as much as you're helping yourself!

Do you see any inspirational people in your lives and want to say something but don't?  What is it that you would say if you could? 


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12 comments:

  1. That's really great that he had the courage to finally ask you. Just goes to show you never know who is watching and the hope you can give someone with a lot of weight to lose when you confirm you don't need "the surgery" to do it!

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  2. how great is that! being an inspiration when you didn't know someone was admiring from afar!

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  3. Great guest post Mr. I admire you guys, one gal at work that has is a tiny thing, but works so hard to maintain that - she makes me with I had followed her path in the beginning instead of going the hard route. Otherwise there aren't many role models for me in terms of weight loss. In terms of just general human-beingness there are a lot of people I admire.

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  4. Awesome post Mr. U know the quote..Smile coz someone could be cheered by it..this is similar..u rock and definitely amazing to know people consider u an inspiration and if that helps us in the return isnt it worth it!! so many folds!! way to go...

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  5. Wow, what a great story! I don't really know what else to say. I'm glad that this encounter was inspirational for the both of you and that you gave him the information he needed/wanted to hear. I hope that you and the Mrs keep pushing onward to reach your goals and keep inspiring others both through this blog and in real life!

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  6. Great post! I have had people ask me similar questions, and I am always happy to talk to them. I think sometimes people think it might be rude for them to bring up weight loss, because then they're implying you were heavier, but I am always flattered. I am struggling with my last 30 pounds, and it seems like it will never happen. But, I've learned it's better to maintain than gain, so that's something.

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  7. What a heartwarming story! I'm a backslider myself, even more so in the last few weeks when we have hosted friends who are waiting for their rental apartment to be available. We take turns cooking, and she has no need to watch her weight...quite the opposite, in fact. I can't make them eat what we should, so I'm cooking like I used to also. So, as soon as they leave and we can quit eating like early 20th century farmhands, we're back on the plan. You guys inspire me to keep working on it, even when I've put back on quite a bit...at least I'm not back where I started.

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  8. Great post, Mr.! Thanks to the Mrs. for sharing her space for a story that can inspire us all.

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  9. What a heartwarming story! I'm a backslider myself, even more so in the last few weeks when we have hosted friends who are waiting for their rental apartment to be available. We take turns cooking, and she has no need to watch her weight...quite the opposite, in fact. I can't make them eat what we should, so I'm cooking like I used to also. So, as soon as they leave and we can quit eating like early 20th century farmhands, we're back on the plan. You guys inspire me to keep working on it, even when I've put back on quite a bit...at least I'm not back where I started.

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  10. I would say, "you make it look so easy" (this wouldn't be about weight loss per se, just overall life) and I know what the person's answer would be, 1) trusting in God and 2) it only looks easy. And as mush as I think I'm there, I've a long way to go. Though some people have said the same to me. Recently with hubby out of work and healing from a knee surgery things have been rough to say the least, and people keep telling me "I don't know how you do it all" and the truth is sometimes I don't. I've been crumbling. And then they say, "Yeah, but you keep getting back up". It's funny how you admire someone for the very thing others admire in you.

    I'm glad this co-worker of yours found the courage to ask, he is so ready. It begins in the mind and creeps out to the body. Maybe, and maybe this is just a girl thing, maybe you could take a sampling of the tasty treats your wife makes so that he could taste that losing weight doesn't have to be bland. I know you often take treats to work to share, maybe they don't make it to the other floors.

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  11. Thank you for a great reminder to give kudos where deserved. I bet that made you fee l good and give you more motivation to continue.
    You both have done an awesome job. Nice work.

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  12. Great blog! I've been getting some comments myself latley and I always get uncomfortable. I'm not sure how to handle it but this puts things in a different light.

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