Friday, November 2, 2012

Mountains vs. Molehills

I was doing an at home circuit the other night and had one of those moments.  You know the ones where you realize you can do something you couldn't do 200 lbs ago?  (Or even 20 lbs ago for some people)

Our cardio "stations" are the treadmill, aerobic step and the rower.


I'd love to say we got this because we wanted this fancy schmancy water rower but nope, it was the only one that could hold my close to 500 lb butt back in the day.  (I call that the "fat tax."  Having to spend twice as much or more on a piece of exercise equipment because you're over the weight limit by an amount you don't want to risk.)  I used to do this with my legs on the floor basically straddling the tank and rowing that way because my big ol' gut would crush me if I tried to strap my legs in.  God I remember how uncomfortable that was but looking back that had to be comical the 2x I attempted it.  It was like as I was rowing forward, my gut would only allow me to go so far and then bounce back.

Row...~*~boing~*~...row...~*~boing~*~

About the past 2 months, I just strapped myself in and did it like a normal person without even thinking about it.  The first time I did it, I thought "I know I can do this, dammit!"  I strapped in and while there's still some goo in the center like a Cadbury egg, I can row forward and not knock myself into last week when I do!  While I realized what a milestone that was when I first did it, I didn't give it the proper recognition.  I guess because I felt like "so what, it's how normal people do things" but when I did it this week, I had a bit of a flashback to the old days and remembered how far I've come.  I remembered the frustration and yes, tears.  I remembered feeling like I would never be able to strap in and do it the way it was meant to be done.

I think of all of the things I want to do but still have so much weight to lose to be able to do them...really good, fun things that I'm deliriously irritated that I can't do yet.  But I need to appreciate overcoming the molehills as well as the mountains or else I'll never appreciate all of the pieces that make up my life.

What molehills have you overcome?  What is the mountain you're looking forward to conquering?

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24 comments:

  1. I was so happy to see that you started using the rower "the right way". It's funny how you don't even know exactly when that moment comes that you realize "hey, I can do this now" but it's awesome when it happens. So proud of you baby!

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    1. Yeah I remember when you said "hey, you've got your feet strapped in!" I'm glad I was finally able to get them in there and row away. How the hell did I ever do that for 30 minutes in the old days!? 2 minutes drives me nuts now!

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  2. WOOT! You are going to make that rowing machine your. . .well, you know.

    There are a TON of mountains in yoga I want conquer. One of the big ones I'm still working on (and may for the rest of my life) is Crow.

    I have made some excellent progress with a few other poses I really want to dominate. My Wheel is coming along nicely and my balancing poses are all getting stronger and stronger (but balancing poses are something I'm naturally stronger at, so I don't really count them).

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    1. You know it! I've always heard the Crow pose is the hardest, I should probably look it up. Maybe it can be one of my goals when I get more weight off!

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  3. SWEET!!! My nemesis is an activity that every child can do, but I dreaded... Still don't like them, but I can do them. The jumping jack! It hurt SO bad to have my gut bouncing around. It felt like it was going to rip off, like in some horror movie. Although, that would have solved the problem, mmm. IT's awesome when you realize that you're not going to kill yourself while trying to live.

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    1. Girl, I HATE jumping jacks. I have to wear the super duper sucker pants if I know those are on the agenda. I'd give myself a hernia (seriously) otherwise.

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  4. That's a great NSV - and you're right, it needs to be recognized properly.

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  5. Thats awesome...I have it with pushups. i can do 20 knee pushups. i want to be able to do regular pushups without breaking my back!

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    1. Push ups can be tricky but I know you'll do it! (With your back in tact!)

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  6. Running... when going for a quick 2 mile run just isn't enough of a workout! Who would have thought! No way I would have thought that 25lbs ago!! HA!

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    1. Isn't that awesome! I find the same with a lot of my workouts. Stuff that used to torch some calories are now on our "easy" list!

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  7. That is wonderful! We do forget to recognize those milestones along the way. Easy to be so focused on what we still can't do that we forget where we came from. Lately I've realized that I now just naturally cross my legs--not just the ankles, legs. I do it all the time now without thinking about it because it's comfortable. Before I lost weight, though, I'd have to grab my pant leg and hoist it up to get one leg over the other, and then I couldn't sit like that very long at all. Oh, and like Laz, running. A mile or two is a 'short' run these days, doesn't get my heart rate up enough to do much.

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    1. I did the same thing! It was like one day I just did it because there was this urge there to do it. Almost like your body tells you when it's ready to do something even if your mind hasn't quite caught up yet.

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  8. Back in the days before Sparkpeople, at my heaviest, I tucked my fears away and went on a hike of maybe 2 or 3 miles, with about a 400 foot drop and regain. I was amazed I could even do it, but I paid for it by not being able to move for two days. Now I think nothing of six or seven miles with 1000 foot elevation gain, and no fatigue or muscle soreness afterward. It's easy to slip into complacency about something you couldn't have done with the weight on, and SO sweet when you come to full, conscious realization of how far you've come.

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  9. Way to go, sista!!! Always need to recognize things conquered. It is an amazing feeling to realize you can now do things that you couldn't before.

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    1. Absolutely! It's the little things that add up to something big!

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  10. Woo hoo! It's all those little victories that add up to the big ones. You should be so proud of yourself--I'm glad you stopped to recognize it!

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  11. Molehills and mountains have been conquered. There was so many...I had shut myself off from life. I went to work, came home, ate and ate and ate, watched TV and slept (in a recliner, the bed was too uncomfortable). I still go to work (but only seven more weeks til retirement!), I still eat, but I eat so differently, and I still watch TV. But I do so much more than that now. I am spending so much time with my grandkids. They come out all the time and spend the night and the day and I love it. We are developing relationships that I hope they remember fondly for the rest of their lives, long after I am gone. I have taken both granddaughters to get their pictures taken at the Mall in the last two weeks. It's a Christmas surprise for their parents. I couldn't have done that before--too much walking--too much effort--TOO MUCH for old fat me!! I have gone to the amusement park two summers in a row with the kids and grandkids. We walked all day long and I fit on every single ride! (That was on my bucket list--things to do again when I lost weight--checked off now--but I may go back anyway--it's so much fun!) I go to volleyball games and football games (when I get the chance)! I walk and I shop and I am active in life. When I sleep, it's in my bed--all night long. I have confidence and self-esteem. I talk to strangers, unafraid of their judgement because of my obesity. There's no obesity to judge anymore. I'm off almost all my blood pressure meds, no more pre-diabetes or heart worries. I'm substitute teaching and loving it! I'd have been scared to death to stand up in front of a bunch of kids when I was fat--ridicule and harassment were sure to result. Retirement is going to be so much better (and hopefully longer) now.

    When you're fat all those molehills combine to make one giant mountain. Finally I had just given up. There was so much I couldn't do because of my size, just basic movement hurt and wore me out.

    But I discovered change is possible. I slowly climbed that mountain and I'm looking down from the top and the view is AWESOME!!!

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  12. There's a street close to my home which is very, very steep. It's only 0.8 miles but you seriously earn each step. I was going up it at least once a week before my back surgery ten years ago, even being injured. Then two years ago I found that I couldn't go half way. My husband and daughter were way ahead of me and I wasn't gonna make it. Had a second surgery for something else last year and been waiting to try it again. Well, last week I conquered that sucker and nearly cried at the top. Two days later I conquered it again and took the long way back to the car for a total of five miles. Yay me!

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  13. What an incredibly wonderful moment that had to be for you! And good for you for going back and giving it the proper recognition, too! You've EARNED it! As silly as this sounds, I cannot wait for the day when I can get up off the couch without having to brace myself to do it. When my big gut is a small gut that I don't have to heft around, and when my core is strong enough to help me stand without the use of my hands. Few things make me feel older and fatter than wrestling with a piece of furniture to be able to stand up right. Another mountain is the day I can look in the mirror and say, "not bad at all". I'm nowhere near that yet, but one day I will be.

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  14. Oh my goodness I had a giggle fit reading this! *boing boing!* Yes, I know exactly how that is!

    One thing I can do now is sit on the couch with my knees brought up towards my chest (not all the way, but MUCH closer!). What a cool feeling!

    I want to be able to run a 5k, that's my goal :)

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