Monday, October 31, 2011

A Milestone Hit!

Welcome to the 200's to me!  This may make skinny girls recoil in horror (to which I flick your feather like body off into the stratosphere) but to a girl who was tipping dangerously close to the 500 lb. mark, this is a big deal.  I haven't seen the 2's since 1999.  At that time I lost 85 lbs. and was feeling pretty friggin' awesome.  But due to the fast weight loss (it was just melting off then, no fads), my gall bladder gave me issues and it took 6 months of pain, dizziness and horror to finally get diagnosed that it was shutting down.  That was the beginning of the end and then add coping with family illnesses, deaths and work stress with food got me to where I was at my worst.

When I hit the 300's, I said when I hit the 200's I wanted to hike this hill that is in a town that was a fun part of my childhood.  It's about 250 feet with a 45 degree slope in many spots and for about a decade there was just no way I could fathom doing it.  I could barely do the stairs or inclines at our local park.  But I longed to lookout over the town and declare my victory over this seemingly impossible hike.  As if by fate, I had booked an out of town trip to this area for this past weekend.

Friday before we left...I hit the 2's.

Saturday, I hit the top...


It was an amazing feeling!  Not only did I make it without really stopping (except to take a pic of a deer) but I felt like a normal person, a fit person.  There was a bit of a lung burn toward the end but I think it was because we actually did a WAY worse hike by accident earlier in the day that made this look like chump change.  I wore my heart rate monitor and over the course of those hikes, I burned 2200 calories that day. There is just no way I could've done that even a year ago.  I think about when we went to Memphis last April and my feet had really bad blisters all over them and I could barely walk without a hobble because of them the next day.  We walked a similar amount Saturday (though much more strenuous due to the amount of inclines and stairs) and I just had a small amount of soreness and no huge blisters on the bottom of my feet.  That's a 70 lb. difference between now and then and I'm so thankful for it.  I remember how frustrating it was then to feel like I'd lost so much but my weight was still holding me back.  This time, I felt like I wasn't held back at all.  There were quite a few groups of people with overweight and obese people that had to stop for a bit to catch their breath but I was glad to see they were still out there living despite it.  So many of us don't.  I so remember that feeling but was glad that we could go at a pace we were now comfortable with and that pace was comparable to what most consider a "fit"pace.  I told myself I would stop if I needed to but I could count maybe two full minutes added up even after going up flights and flights of stairs in a row.  Heck, even young boy scouts were sucking more wind than we were.  There's something to be said about awesome cardio!  So it was a great weekend of celebrating this new chapter on my path.

I need to think of how I want to celebrate getting into the 1's.  (I will NOT call it "one-derland" because I don't enjoy barfing from cheesy sayings)  I hope it doesn't take as long as that 100 lbs. did but I'm going to do it up right y'all!

Do you celebrate milestones?  Any suggestions for the next 100 lb. milestone?

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Friday, October 28, 2011

It takes working not wanting

A person on a weight loss site was noting the negativity there and how people are so down on themselves saying how they can't do it or calling themselves failures before barely trying or assuming they're doomed to fail because how is this time any different than any previous attempts?  I remember having these thoughts many times on my various "attempts" over my years of trying to get this thing right.  I remember the name calling, the negativity before ever really committing to the change or just assuming I couldn't do something because it looked hard or God forbid, I sweat!

When people ask The Mr. or myself how we're doing this, they listen intently, eyes aglow, smile on their faces waiting for us to give them the secret behind our success.  They can't wait to hear what book they need to buy, what pill they need to shop for or how many ounces of wolfbane and eye of newt they need to place an order for at the local witchery.  When we say eating healthy and exercise, you see the smile leave their faces, posture drop and eyes glaze over.  If they bother to engage you at all after that, it's typically to say "oh, I thought you were going to tell me something I don't know."  Sorry to disappoint you but the magic pill isn't here and you shouldn't sit on your ass getting fatter waiting for it.  I was always too scared to get pills and surgery wasn't going to be my path regardless of how fat I got.  In the days of attempting change over the years, we would lose a little weight and then hit that dreaded plateau and then say "I don't know why this is happening...we're doing everything we can and nothing is helping."  The truth was, we were "eyeballing" or putting forth enough effort to get by but certainly  not doing everything we could.  Lying to ourselves seemed more conducive to our psyches than to say "time to kick it up."  We were eating better than when we weren't on a plan but still not watching sodium or looking to get in the most fruits and veggies possible, we would exercise but not 5 days a week and we didn't do it with the kind of effort we put into it now.  We were drinking more water but not enough water.  All of these things we improved upon slightly but never really fully committed to were somehow "doing everything we could" to us.  Pardon my French but bullsh*t!


Thursday, October 27, 2011

It's The Great Pumpkin Cupcakes

Tonight one of my favorite childhood cartoons is on TV.  "It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" is a timeless favorite for young and old and I can't wait to curl up with The Mr and hear Linus faithfully try to talk everyone into staying in his sincere pumpkin patch or Charlie Brown watch his rock collection grow.  (Seriously, how rude!  Poor kid.)  In honor of this childhood classic (and needing to make something for The Mr's Halloween potluck today), I came up with these "It's the Great Pumpkin" Cupcakes.


This is more about decorating than a big homemade recipe so I'm keeping it simple.  Here's what you'll need:


24 baked spice cupcakes from a box of Duncan Hines Spice Cake Mix (I followed the lower fat recipe)
1 can of whipped vanilla frosting  (used whipped over buttercream to save on some calories)
Wilton Gel Kelly Green food coloring
Autumn Leaves sprinkles
Brachs Mallowcreme Pumpkins
Wilton #233 "Hair" decorating tip and coupler
Wilton disposable piping bag (or ziptop bag and a lot of patience)



Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Review: Supreme 90 Day System

We've been doing the Supreme 90 Day exercise DVD's for about 2 months now.  I schedule one cardio and one strength training session for the most part every week.  I'll be honest I was skeptical when I saw a DVD combo kit that promised to deliver the kind of results that I would see on fancier infomercials for a mere $20-25 especially when I was seeing comparable systems for 4-5x that amount.  I wanted to get through all 10 DVD's before doing an official review for it.  To fully utilize the workouts, they suggest you have dumbbells, mats and a stability ball however, we don't have stability balls and they give you modifications for doing it on the floor.  We've never felt like we're missing out because of it.  If you don't have dumbbells, you can use large soup cans or half gallon milk jugs (with easy built in handles!)  But using the weights will net you the maximum results so invest in even a set of 5's, 10's and/or 15's to have on hand as you progress.

To say it was the best $25 we ever spent is an understatement.  I loathe these workouts in the way that you loathe something you know is good for you but will kick your ever lovin' butt.    The two cardios I like are the Cardio Challenge (my favorite) and the Tabata Inferno.  They keep your heart rate up, you use light weights and by the time you're done you just want to eat to restore your energy.  I mean we did the Cardio Challenge last night and I had chili in the crockpot and we felt like we could feel the life coming back into us as we ate because we had just expended so much energy.  The focus is interval training which we all know is hot right now but that's because it works.  It's full blast for 30 seconds then 30 second rest or the other is like on for 4 minutes off for one, I think?  (If I were being paid for this review I'd get off my butt to double check it but my legs are jello so said butt is stayin' put)  I'll admit my scale isn't doing The Dip ala Freak Nasty  (tell me I'm not the only one who knows that song) but I've gone down a dress size on top and I feel muscles that once you peel away the squishy layer will look quite sex-ay.

The strength workouts focus on muscle confusion and working different muscle groups per DVD.  I have really like all of them except for the one dedicated only to legs.  I don't know what it was about it but I hated it so much I actually stopped mid-workout to do a different one.  That's just me though, you might like it.  My favorite is the Back and Bi's.  It sucks...in a good way.  The next day I always feel like I'm going to keel just lifting a soup can!  There are these moves called "good mornings" where you hinge, lean forward then do what would be an overhead press and hinge back up.  It's toward the end and sweet baby Jesus you feel super human for completing them some days.  

When we first got this workout, it was for the days we were going to "step it up" and now that we have, we're so glad we did.  It almost makes me emotional because before I started or even the first 100 pounds into this journey I would've looked at that video and said 'there's no way in Hell I could ever do that!'  I would often dismiss hard moves in any workout as something my big ol' body just couldn't do without ever giving myself a chance to prove myself wrong.  At the point we bought this workout, I had gained some confidence in workouts and while I still have to modify things here and there, I looked at it and said 'I could do this eventually.'  Then when it came time to put the gonads on the line, we popped in the DVD and I did it straight through modifying minimally and coming out the other end proud as a peacock.  

So would I recommend Supreme 90 Day?  Absolutely.  Because whether you're currently ready for it, looking to switch up your routine or need to aspire to work up to it, $25 is a small price to pay for 10 DVD's much less 10 DVD's that are this good!

(This is *not* a paid review for this workout DVD.  If it was I would likely not use a Freak Nasty reference or say gonad.  Before starting any new exercise plan, check with your doctor or personal trainer)


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Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The thin line of visible and invisible

When you're super duper morbidly obese, you get used to being invisible.  The rare times you decide to throw yourself to the mercy of the public, you accept as fact that people like furniture store sales people, fellow shoppers in a grocery store, cashiers and even the usually predatory car salesmen will not acknowledge you.  You will literally have someone cut you off with their cart to the point that you are astonished that they didn't physically run over your foot and I'm not a "fetal fattie", I will go off on a beeotch, yo...or at least let them know I know what they did with an "are you effing serious!?" turn to the Mr and say loudly "did you see that rude ass!?"  There is nothing more irritating to me that people who are blatantly rude to others in thinking their mission is any more important than yours or someone else and I am the champion of the underdog so I just say something.  Oddly, no one outside of a car has said something back.  They seriously are in their own world and you are just not important to them especially if you're fat.

When we lost over 150 lbs, we started seriously noticing a difference in how we were treated at those same places that we were shunned before.  It was both a relief and maddening because everyone regardless of size deserves to be treated with some respect.  Suddenly furniture places looked at us as though we could afford what was in their stores and car salesmen deemed us prey-worthy (that one I could do without) and we were even acknowledged a few times in the grocery with an "excuse me."  It was all enough to make us think that was no longer a hurdle but we had one of those days last weekend that made us just totally feel like we'd crossed back into invisibility.  From almost getting hit by some d-bag that wasn't paying attention (and watching he and the Mr have a bit of a screaming match side by side) to getting ignored by multiple employees at a home store except for the one obese employee who did approach us (which is fine by me because in commission based businesses, I will ALWAYS give my money to the underdog salesperson who is too shy, too shunned or too overweight to be considered competition by sleazeball co-workers) to this scrawny wench who seriously stepped INTO me at Old Navy and I said "SERIOUSLY?" (no response) and I was breathing down her neck she was so close to me.  I'm surprised she didn't think she was getting accosted by a ghost with my irritated heavy breathing on her neck until the Mr lead me away from her.  I totally got the attitude that SHE belonged there and I didn't so she was just going to step into a space I was already occupying.

It was just one of those days but a good reminder that even at almost 200 lbs down, I'm still fat by society's standards and still not worthy of "fitting in" to places they'd rather not see me.  TOO DAMN BAD!  I'm here, I'm workin' on it and I'm not going away!  I am glad for this reminder because there will come a time that getting acknowledged will happen more often than not and I never want to forget that feeling of feeling less than in other people's eyes just based on my cover.  It'll remind me to always treat others out in public the way I would want to be treated.

Have you ever been ignored and felt it was because of your weight or image issue?

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Monday, October 24, 2011

Ring a Ding

Well we did it.  After talking about needing to do the deed last week, we went to our jeweler to get our rings resized.

The Mr went down a size from an 11 to a 10.  Mine went from a 10 to a...are you read for it?  7 1/2!!  That's two whole and a half whole sizes!!  I am still floored!  I mean it felt like I went from baby hand to POW size 10 fingers in high school on.  I have never in my life been a 7 1/2 in any rings I've worn except maybe I don't know 6th grade?  Who knows!  That's a size a 'normal' person wears.  Like, they actually have those sizes for people to try on at the jewelers instead of me having to slide it on my pinky and visualize.  I am in utter disbelief and so happy.  This is a major non-scale victory for me so I'm going to relish it.  I don't expect many to understand just what kind of milestone this feels like but I really needed this one.  (It didn't hurt that when I was in my skivvies the other day The Mr said 'damn girl, you are looking svelte!' and I laughed and said 'I don't know about svelte but thank you!'  He said 'well I like the way things are looking!  Now learn to accept a compliment!'  So that was nice along with the 2 lb. loss Saturday)

That was my excitement for the weekend...what was one good thing that happened to you this weekend?

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Saturday, October 22, 2011

Sooo close - Weigh In

I lost 2 lbs this week!  (insert rump poppin' dance here)

If I can lose 2 lbs next week I can hit my goal and be in new BIG numbers next weekend.  The problem with this  is we're not going to be able to weigh in on our normal day so weigh in would have to be Friday and I can seriously lose a pound overnight.  (I usually knew what I weighed Friday could be down a pound like clockwork on Saturday)  So it's very possible if I hit it, I wouldn't know it.  Don't think it hasn't crossed my mind to bring the scale with us but it's a big ol' doctors office plug in scale and I wouldn't want to screw up the calibration in it so I'll just have to hope for the best Friday.  I just really wanted to be able to celebrate new numbers by the end of the month.  We'll see.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

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Friday, October 21, 2011

Childhood faves

I'm thinking it's time to dork off today.  It is Friday after all!  The topic?  Childhood.  Here are some of the faves from my childhood which will sadly date me and make some of you not want to associate with me anymore to which I say...screw you, you'll be approaching middle age one day, be desperate to od on nostalgia and you'll remember this post...and cry.

These are the things that give me warm fuzzies.  Click the pic to enlarge.

Row 1:
Barbie Townhouse (in which my kitten took more than one ride up and down the elevator.  Settle down animal lovers, she liked it)
Fashion Plates (I was sure the prairie skirts and halter top was a bitchin' option for cutting edge fashion.  Too bad by the time I got it, they were already outdated fashions.  Ask me if I care)
Monkey Swing (Loved that thing!  What I wouldn't give to be able to swing on one of these without fear of the branch breaking!)
Holly Hobbie Oven  (Baking with light bulbs was the coolest!  Can you imagine how many weeks it would take to cook now with an LED light?)

Row 2:
Lite Brite (Luckily I wasn't corrupted enough when I had to make suggestive pics or curse words.)
Strawberry Shortcake dolls  (My whole room looked like Strawberry Shortcake exploded in there from wallpaper to sheets to the record album..."smile a sunny mornin'")
Wacky Wall Walker (usually found as a prize in cereal boxes and only good for about 4-6 throws before it started collecting dust and hair on the sticky adhesive that made it walk.  It was never the same when you washed it off)
View Master  (I really wish I could recall what discs I had back in the day but we just bought one at an antique store.  Sigh)

Row 3:
Monchichi  (Still have mine in the basement!)
Scratch and Sniff Stickers  (For our 14th anniversary The Mr got me the Hot Stuff Pizza sticker and the Happy Birthday Cupcakes I always loved.  Why didn't I think to keep these things!?)
Fresh N' Fancy Make Your Own Make Up  (I swear I think I'm the only one that had this thing!  I loved making perfumes and nail polishes and make up)
Swatch Watch  (That was my Swatch.  That effer sells for hundreds on Ebay now.  GRRRR!)

Row 4:
Whoopsie Doll  (You would squeeze her belly and her pigtails would move.  She was my favorite baby doll)
Jarts aka- Lawn Darts  (These are THE most awesome things ever.  Metal tipped and you knew you'd better get your ass outta the way or risk getting impaled by grandpa if you're not paying attention.  The plastic ones are for wusses)
Dream Date PJ/Barbies  (She's representing the whole Barbie clan for me but she was always the one I considered the most glamorous.  Interesting she's not an actual Barbie.  Also had Western Barbie (who reminded me of Dottie West from my grandma's era), Crystal something or other Barbie and 10 others as well as the obligatory eunuch Ken doll whose head popped off way too easy) and finally
Simon (it was so revolutionary for its time and you didn't want to be the one who screwed up and got the ominous buzzzzzzzzzz)

What are some of your favorite childhood toys that give you the warm fuzzies?

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Thursday, October 20, 2011

Baby It's Cold Outside

I have such a hard time finding coats that I like.  I'm so tired of settling for coats with no shape because my shape is so screwed up.  I did something I swore I wouldn't do but I ordered a coat online after hearing I could return it to the store if there was a problem.  It's the style I've always liked, oh and I got a killer deal scoring it for $96 instead of $159 with a coupon code:


It's pretty simple.  I can pick any accent color scarf or gloves with it but honestly I'll probably stick with my black ones.  I know, I really go out on the fashion limb, do I not?  I am nervous for it to get here because I just want to know it fits.  I hate not being able to try something on because it takes me back to the days I had no choice but to order from catalogs.  But the stuff I was finding in store were just hideous and I said last year I wasn't settling when I had to get a new coat so this is my current idea of not settling.  So keep your fingers crossed that the "middle muffin" (between the boobs and the gut) allow me to sit in this without popping a button off and getting charged with manslaughter.

Are you getting a new winter coat this year?  Where are your favorite places to shop for coats?

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Wednesday, October 19, 2011

No longer a perfect 10

I've always had big, long fingers.  My class ring size when I ordered it my sophomore year in high school was a 10.  When we were looking at rings for our engagement and the woman sized me, she told my then boyfriend (now hubby) "it'll be easy for you to remember her size, she's a perfect 10" despite the fact I was probably 50 lbs heavier than when I got my class ring.  Even when I got to my highest weight, my ring size was still basically a 10, albeit a little tighter depending on the day.

Now that almost 200 pounds have come off, I didn't really expect my ring size to change much since it didn't seem to change when I put those pounds on and I still have about 60 pounds to go before I reach the weight I was when I ordered my class ring.  But as I sit here typing, I'm wearing my wedding and anniversary rings on my index finger.  My middle finger is now the one well worn by the rings for the past year and wearing it on my index finger proves to be a little tricky as it likes to get caught on everything from my sweaters to my forehead when I forget its there.  So I'm thinking it's time to resize and the Mr may need to get his done as well.  His has already been resized once and it's getting loose again.  So I suppose I'm okay with not being a perfect 10 anymore in Ringland.  I'm putting my body on alert though...I would like to have weight come off in other places before dealing with this issue again so if you have some kind of "preferences" section in there, I request checking the stomach and legs options over the hand, shoulders and boobs being at the top of the list for shrinkage.

Have you had to have your ring resized on your weight loss journey?  If so, how many ring sizes?


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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Pumpkin Cookies

I'm sure you're overwhelmed by pumpkin goodness right now.  Recipes, actual pumpkins everywhere, decorations, etc.  Well, here's some more:


I love pumpkin cookies.  When I see them in the grocery store with the bright orange icing on them, I get all nostalgic because when The Mr. and I were early in our relationship, a now defunct grocery chain made these really awesome ones that other grocery stores just don't seem to compare to.  I'm still searching for that ultimate pumpkin cookie recipe but these are some great ones that I found and put my own spin on and to say the family loved them is an understatement.  They're thinking of asking me to make them for Thanksgiving (which I think was basically them testing the waters to see if I was open to it.  Sure add a 4th thing I'm supposed to bring.  *Pfft*)  These babies are good on their own, dipped in glaze or used as adorable mini whoopie pies.  They stay fresh, moist and light for the length of their little lives.  (Okay, I'm going to confess something.  I made a buttload of these and after I brought them to the Mr's birthday celebration I put them in the fridge and totally forgot about them!  It had been a week since I made them, they were still in perfect condition but tasted of fridge because they were in a crappy thin ziptop bag.  I threw away pumpkin cookies! Who am I!?!  Those suckers wouldn't have lasted 3 days here in the olden days!)  So yeah, these are the things I was talking about yesterday that would be perfect to take a loverly dunk in your morning coffee, tea, milk, hot chocolate, water...okay maybe not water.

If you're looking to enjoy them as well, click here for the printable recipe.

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Monday, October 17, 2011

I'm a Teatotaler...


...in both senses of the word...the real one (teetotaler- one who abstains from alcohol) and the fictional name I just gave for a pseudo catchy title that hopefully got you here, meaning one who totally drinks tea.  Like that? (Stop rolling your eyes!)

I'm a pretty big wuss when it comes tea flavors.  I like white, green, black and when I go hardcore I roll with English Breakfast tea.  Color me dull.  I drink iced tea everyday and the occasional spot of hot tea which is quickly worming its way into my morning routine as the weather cools down.  When we were in a hotel, they had an array of teas they brought me every morning so I brought some home to try at my leisure.  I tried the orange spice.  Meh.  The Earl Grey.  No thanks.  I even hoped I'd be oh-so-fashionable and see if I was a chai girl.  Chai don't think so.  It doesn't stop there.  When it comes to iced tea I want straight up black tea.  I've been to places that have only raspberry tea or lemon tea and I when I realize that, I order water.  I'm just not cosmopolitan when it comes to tea.  I'm a bore, I know but I'd like to think I make up for it in other areas so I'm fine with my lack of an adventurous side in tea arts.  Tomorrow I'll bring you a recipe that'll have you wanting to dunk it into your morning hot drink of choice so make sure you swing by.

What about you?  Do you drink tea?  What are your favorites?

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Saturday, October 15, 2011

Back to the starting line- Weigh In

I lost the pound I didn't deserve to gain last week.  So I'm back to what I was when I started the month.  I'd celebrate but you know, it's like I've lost nothing this month and all of my workouts have been for nothing so I'll just say it is what you make it and move on.

Stayed up waaaay too late watching the Hawaii Warriors and San Jose State go through a 12 turnover game only to have my Warriors lose by 1.  Quite a game but not good when you're up early for a road trip.  Zzzzzz.  Hope everyone has a great weekend!

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Friday, October 14, 2011

A Torrid Affair

You've heard me talk about vanity sizing before.  I have recently been reshaping the bod due to the increase in kick butt strength workouts so while the scale is mooning me every week, I'm somehow slipping down a size.  Now I know that despite the 18/20 label that Avenue and Lane Bryant neatly tuck into my shirt to tell me "atta girl!  You're smaller than you thought!" that I'm not a true 18/20 right now.  I know that in old school sizes I would be closer to say a 24/26 (not a 28 nor a 22 typically attached to those two numbers so that's why I made up my own size there).  I don't mind.  The point is I'm going down a size and lying to me about what that size is does not make me feel better about myself.  I'm glad I'm shrinking but I prefer to be spoon fed some hard truth numbers, you dig?

So I'm thinking since at least 2 places (no, 3 now that I think about it in a big box store) all have my top half at 18/20, I was lulled into a false sense of security that this was now my size.  I spied Torrid having a 50-75% sale and knowing that I can fit comfortably into my 22/24's from there, I figured when there were a few 18/20's at great prices, I should snag them up and saved $60 on 3 items.  (Actually I didn't save $60 because I wouldn't have paid full price but I digress...)  The package arrived the other day and I rip open one of the shirts and I held it up and laughed and said "this will never fit."  Oh, it fit.  It fit my rolls like saran wrap baby.  These shirts were TRUE 18/20's...which is not my true size and instead of feeling all crappy about it, I wanted to write them and thank them!  THANK YOU for not treating me like some brittle esteemed d-bag that needs a particular number to feel validated.  Torrid says "this is you sister, deal with it!"  You know what?  I am.  I like not being pandered to and being slipped the red pill to show me the reality.  I gots mah big girl panties on (figuratively and literally) and I'm all good.  One day I'll fit into them and the victory will be that much sweeter for me!

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Thursday, October 13, 2011

Allow me to geek out for a moment

It's probably pretty obvious that I'm an amateur photographer.  I may have done some weddings and turned out some fairly good landscapes in my time that are hanging in people's living rooms (which makes me giddy to no end) but photographing food?  Well, that's a lot harder than it looks.  I have what we call a "2 butt kitchen."  It's remodeled but not fancy.  The counterspace is nil and natural lighting is non-existent in our south facing kitchen which usually harbors rather hard light bouncing off of my car windshield out front.

It has been my goal to one day get on a site like Foodgawker.com.  I see tons of bloggers with these amazing pictures of food that looks straight out of Bon Appetit magazine and I think "I could never do that.  They have amazing props, kitchen prowess, natural light and photography skills you will never possess."  That's the spirit!  *rolling eyes*  After getting rejected a few times from them and another site, my self esteem was in the toilet and I was ready to give up.  A few that I thought were good were just not in comparison, I guess.  Finally, I got accepted!  My homemade  pineapple sauce was put up for all to gawk.


It was the first one I was truly proud of before it got accepted and now I'm even more giddy and goofy over it.  I have sooo much to learn when it comes to getting it right photographing food but this gives me the boost I need to keep learning and aiming higher.  When you're overweight and trying to get healthy, you're used to feeling that inferiority and that you're not good enough.  It's hard to shake especially when you branch out but I'm tired of being "that girl" that never believes in herself or just assumes she will fail at everything she tries.  I failed at weight loss more times than I can count but I seem to have gotten something right.  So why would photography be any different?  I already see major improvements from when I first started doing it and I know that as long as I continue to apply the same determination I have with my weight loss journey to something I have a passion for, like photography, then it will be a given I will succeed.

To see the picture on Foodgawker.com, click here.

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Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Happy Birthday to my honey

I met my honey when we were just kids.  I was a senior in high school and he was a freshman in college.  Through various circumstances, we found ourselves at the same job not once but twice and we even worked beside each other at one for a few years so carpooling was convenient and I always had a lunch buddy.  I knew within 6 months of meeting him I wanted to marry him.  We'd already been tested by many things from family issues to bad intentions by people we thought were in our corner and came out on top.  (I truly feel like "Still the One" by Shania Twain was written for us.  The pop version, not the twangy one)

My hubby is a LOT like his father and that's a very good thing.  His dad was a good man and so is he.  He is kind, considerate, a hard worker (the man has a work ethic that make most people look like utter slackers), he doesn't complain when I want to shop- in fact he likes it, he got fat with me and is getting healthy with me (how many hubby's do you know that support much less participate in a weight loss journey?  Sadly, not as many as there should be), he's easy on the eyes and has the most amazing green eyes you've ever seen.  So many people tell us we're lucky and they don't know anyone with a better marriage than ours.  I'd have to agree.  We balance each other well and while we still have much to learn, I'd say now that we've been together more of our lives than not, that we have to mechanics of this well oiled machine of a marriage down pretty good.  There are always challenges but how would you grow closer if not conquering those things and supporting each other?

I felt lucky to go to my senior prom with him.  How many women can say that?  I've watched him grow from an unsure boy into a wonderful man.  I've seen him at his best, his worst, his most insecure and confident, I've seen him make decisions that shouldn't have had to be made and decisions that brought him praise, I've seen every side of him emotionally, physically and literally and I love them all.

I am so thankful his parents were feeling randy on that January night when they made the most perfect man for me and didn't even know it.  Happy Birthday my love.  You are everything right in this world.




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Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Pineapple Sauce

I was reading The Novice Chef's post for pumpkin applesauce and wondered if I could make something similar. I only have monster vats of pumpkin right now that I didn't want to open but I did have 8 oz of pineapple I froze the week before and thought the combo of that with the granny smith apples I had left from an overzealous trip to two grocery stores would make a good pairing.  I was right.  Ker-pow did that baby hit the tastebuds!


It was nice to make my honey something homemade that he usually spoons out of a jar for his lunches.  I packed all of them up into five 4 oz cups for his lunch so he'd have a little sweets from his sweet.


You can make it for your sweetie too...for the printable recipe, click here.
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Monday, October 10, 2011

Meh

I must've written 5 different things here.  All too twisted for color TV.  I'm in a horrific, suffocating funk right now.  That's about all I can say.  I'm just here with my spoon...trying to dig my way out.

How do you handle funks?  (I'm not talking the kind that turn into something that may need meds)

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Saturday, October 8, 2011

Ugh-- Weigh In

The 190 lost gravatar is still in tact but not without weighing a pound more than I weighed last weekend.  Between Aunt Flo and a rather liberal high cal day last weekend, we know what needs to be done.  High cal days are getting a makeover.  It's time.

I'm not jazzed (and honestly I didn't deserve a gain but the Mr. gained a pound too so it was pretty obvious) but you do what you've gotta do.

Now, off to take some ibuprofen to get rid of this headache trying to brew before a road trip.

Hope everyone has a great weekend and congrats to those who get to enjoy a long one due to the holiday!

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Friday, October 7, 2011

Pie face

I made pumpkin cookies last night.  They were puffy, good and needed cloves next time.  That's not the point.  I had about 2-3 tbsp of pumpkin left and didn't want to throw it away.  Then I remembered this facial recipe I'd heard of about a year ago.  Did you know pumpkin is a major source of antioxidants and not just when you eat it but it can be used topically as well.  Yeah, like on your skin.  People actually pay $95 for that crap!  You don't have to.


Grab 2-3 tbsp of pumpkin, 1 tbsp of plain or greek yogurt and 1 tsp of honey.  Then mix it all together until it looks like a cute little crustless pie you want to throw in the oven.


Then dig in baby.  Slather it.  Feel the cool, refreshing antioxidants doing what they do best.  Getcho pie face on!  Leave it on for 15-20 minutes and then wash it off and pat your face dry.  This is a nice way to use some of that leftover pumpkin and get a refreshing beauty facial on the cheap!  It's really a matter of being green.  Reduce, reuse, recycle and all that jazz!  Or maybe you just want to put pie on your face without the judgment of a face print in the Thanksgiving version!

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Thursday, October 6, 2011

The Virtue of Snail Mail

Yes, I realize virtue may be a strong word when referring to snail mail but it's a dying art.  There is nothing better than getting an honest to goodness handwritten letter in the mail.  As a friend and I were looking for ways to reconnect across the miles, I wrote her a handwritten note and folded it up like an arrow like we did back in high school and would pass to each other between classes.  (To see how to do it yourself, go to this video.)

She said when she got it, it made her smile and when I received one back, it did the same for me.  Monday was a good day.  The Mr. made an grocery run without being told, bought me flowers and a card.  As if that wasn't enough, I got not one but two cards from 2 friends.  One was a Halloween card and the other was a thank you card from the friend mentioned above along with a handwritten "school" note.  I think I had a smile plastered on my face for 5 solid minutes.  She ended with how proud she was of me and our health accomplishments and that meant a lot to me.  Sure, it would've been nice to hear in an email (not in a text though...mainly because I don't text!  Yeah, I'm boycotting) but in the end, there is nothing like seeing someone's handwriting.  Just seeing the way someone dots their I's or writes their A's differently than anyone else you know makes it special.  I mean really, how special would a recipe be if it was just printed from the internet or a Word document?  But when written in Grandma's handwriting, it becomes a treasure.  In a time when all we can really expect in our mailboxes are bills or junk mail, how nice is it to get a card or letter to know that someone thought of you and more than just to "poke" you online.  (Gross!)  It could come on a day that someone is feeling particularly down or had a bad day at work or felt like no one cared.

So here's a well being exercise for you.  Write a letter.  To your parents, your child or spouse (and SEND it in the mail to them!), a best friend, an old friend, an old boss, a teacher you loved in school or anyone you like.  It doesn't matter what you say (well, I suppose it does, don't be an a-hole!) but just that you thought it would be fun to write them.  Not only will they feel good getting it, you'll feel good writing it!  I just sent one back to her with Charlie Brown Halloween stickers just like mine were decorated with puffy stickers.  It's a small gesture to let someone know they're thought of and more than just to shoot off an informal email.  It says "you're worth the time and effort and you're special to me!"  And that my friends, is a virtue!

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Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Dark Chocolate Muffins

A week or so ago, I was craving a chocolate muffin something awful.  I don't even eat chocolate muffins so I don't know where it came from.  I found a recipe (which I am desperately searching for so I can credit it.  I'm usually so good about bookmarking it.  Will update when I find it)  I stocked up my pantry shelf in the basement so I could have anything on hand when the whim struck.  When I sent the Mr down to grab some chocolate chips he said we only had dark chocolate chips.  Darn.  A tragedy in the making.  A delicious, melty, tastes-like-grandma's-cookies-but-they're-muffins tragedy.


Yeah.  I used white whole wheat flour to give a little more nutrients in it, I used Hain No Sodium Baking Powder to reduce sodium but listed using that and regular in the nutritional info and you know, since dark chocolate has flavinoids and all, they're practically healthy right?  *wink*  The Mr's co-workers said it tasted like a cakey chocolate chip cookie and seemed to love them.  We agree!

If you want the printable recipe, click here.

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Tuesday, October 4, 2011

A Gift from my HRM

I didn't tell you guys this because I wanted to give it a month to see if it was going to effect anything.  When my age flipped over another number this year, I updated my HRM (Heart Rate Monitor) and it gave me a "gift"...it upped my target heart rate zone.  Gee thanks.  So now I would have to work even harder to burn the calories I want to burn each week.  (4200 calories is what I shoot for every week)

I was filled with dread because the Mr is always complaining about how he can never get up to his target heart rate for more than a few minutes per workout if at all.  I was now in his range.  It wasn't going to change my calorie burn.  If I had to do another 10-20 minutes to hit the 1000 calorie mark I needed then that's what was going to be done.  Period.  I was glad to see that I really only needed another 5 minutes and/or more intensity to get what I needed.  Now I will say that after adding those newer Supreme 90 Day over the past 5 weeks that our usual walk in the park with hills now requires 2x around the trail (for the most part) to reach the same calorie burn.  Now THAT sucked!  So we will have to just accept that an extra 20 minutes will have to be added to that one.  But other than that, I've come out calorie burn wise, unscathed which is a relief!
So eff you new age, you're not going to beat me!

Have you noticed you have to work harder from year to year or has your calorie burn/effort remained pretty steady?  (Please note I'll curse you under my breath if you're the latter!)

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Monday, October 3, 2011

Channeling Julia Child

Okay, maybe I wasn't whipping up Boeuf Bourguignon or Coq Au Vin but I was feelin' my culinary mojo yesterday.  I was craving a good grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup since the weather is a little cooler, it seemed like a good time to dive in.  I rarely indulge in soup because of the sodium content (well over 1000mg of it for a can) but yesterday that was what I was craving and so was the Mr.  I busted that bad boy outta the park!  He wanted ham on his so I gave him a full serving and I did half.  I got some Trader Joe's Italian Loaf round bread and I picked my poison.  A slice of thin lacy marbled colby jack, a slice of lite muenster and 1/2 an ounce of asiago cheese.  I pressed it on the panini press and we chowed down.  The hubby raved, which is always my objective.  He said he'd have paid for it and it was better than anything in a restaurant.  Good thing I was inspired for dinner.  Earlier at the grocery store, I bought some tri tip angus steak.  We rarely have steak but I was feeling it.

I put some black pepper on each side and seared them and then finished them off in the oven.  As they were cooking, I microwaved some potatoes, scooped out the middle and added an ounce of light cream cheese, cut up some green onions, pepper and skim milk.  I returned the dreamy mixture to the potato shells, topped them with a little asiago and broiled them for a few minutes.  While that was going on, I made a quick garlic herb butter and after the steaks rested, I put about 1/2 tbsp of it on top and served it to the salivating hubby. Here's a crappy pic of it with the point and shoot...



He sunk in his chair, eyes rolled back, groaning that groan that symbolizes total foodgasm and makes every cook, professional or not, feel accomplished.  It was damn good.  He raved from beginning to end and even gave me a big ol' smooch.  He said that we have eaten better in the past few years since we began our journey than we ever did when we ate whatever we wanted when we wanted.  Curious yet true!

What signature dish do you make ensures you'll get rave reviews?

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Saturday, October 1, 2011

Le' Goose Egg - Weigh In

Don't know what's so friggin' French about it but ate the same amount of calories (even on high cal day) and burned the same amount as last week when I lost 3 lbs and got nothing.  The Mr. lost 2 pounds though after staying in his calorie range but eating enough sodium to send a horse into ICU.  Don't you love the fairness of this whole thing?

So yeah, I'll be fat forever.  At this rate I should have those 4 lbs off by our Spring trip, if I'm lucky.  I knew last week was a fluke.  Next week Aunt Flo is here so that means another zero despite my best efforts.  Meh.

*Multiple finger gestures to my body*

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